Mend My Broken Heart
by Moonshine79
Summary: What would you do if the person you loved was taken away from you? Will you give up or do what your heart tells you to do: LenxHino...Chapter 8 finally here!
1. Chapter 1

Another story….hopefully my second thank God! I still hope you enjoy this and give me honest reviews! Please….R&R! (Read and Review) Thanks….. :]

I woke up and saw the bright light of the sun beaming from my window, my eyes hurt from crying I just couldn't bare the pain anymore he was a dignified person in school and he deserves the best he doesn't deserve a worthless girl like me, who was he kidding? Choosing her over me it was the right choice why would I still hesitate that he would turn back now? I'm just so naïve

I sat at the side of my bed and looked at my alarm clock surprised to see that I woke up before my clock even alarmed, which would only happen to me once in a blue moon maybe because if I closed my eyes once more it would just cause me great sorrow and I can't bare to shed another tear again. I stood up and headed for the bathroom, there I washed up and I saw my reflection at the mirror. My eyes were red and it looked obvious that I cried the entire night, why couldn't I get over him yet? The fact that he was never mine and that I never owned him why was I this desperate and this hurt? Is it possible it was more than simply just a crush? Is it possible…that I'm in love with him? No, it's not possible

I took the towel and wiped my face, I made my way down the staircase and there I heard my mother preparing breakfast and as always nii-sama was still asleep and drooling in her bed

"You're up early Kaho, something wrong?" a tone of worry was in her voice I could tell

"I'm fine, I just couldn't get enough sleep that's all" I replied to her and gave her a good morning kiss on the cheeks I could smell the delicious food

"Mmm, smells great is it done yet?" I asked

"Soon, it'll be done in a few minutes" she gave me tender and sweet smile I smiled back

I went to the leaving room and sat down at the sofa, I didn't feel like turning on the tv I wasn't in the mood, I didn't even feel like going to school anyway but what was I suppose to do? I only wanted to go to school to see _him _the one and only reason asides from associating with my friends and where I could play freely that was the main reason why. But now that he has found someone else what's the use of attending anyway? Lessons didn't much concern me, I find it a torture always sitting at my classroom and listening to my teacher's boring lessons…as always, studying never interested me nor did it found interest in me but still my mother would always scowl me "Education is the key to success it opens new doors for you and if that key is lost you may never open those doors" I smiled knowing she was right 'Mothers are always right' I thought my mother always wanted what was best she would never lead me something to my misery, she was caring, kind, loving, and understanding I loved her I really do.

Time passed so quickly and as I knew I was already wearing my school clothes I didn't want to attend school. I never wanted to enter the gates of the one place that made my world crash and stumble I didn't want to return to hell, which I always thought of ever since that day…

_~Flashback~ _

"_Everyone I would like you to meet Akiko Sakomoto, she is a new Music student and will be joining the concourse" Kanazawa-sensei exclaimed as she steeped into the room every one was all shocked _

"_Whaaattt!?" everyone was in shock except Tsukimori-kun since it was __the__ Akiko Sakomoto the great violinist who as talented as Len she was beautiful and smart she's got everything: Beauty, brains and talents and was rich and famous she was almost perfect _

"_Nice to meet you all" she bowed to show a kind gesture _

"_And I'm sure you will enjoy here Akiko-san" Yunoki said and gave her a warm and sweet smile she in return, smiled back as well _

"_And besides that, she is also Tsukimori-kun's fiancé candidat" Kanazawa-sensei said, we all gasped even Len _

"_F-fiancée candidate? H-how could that be?" he was so much in shock and so was us. _

"_You're mother never told you huh?" replied Kanazawa-sensei, Len shook his head_

"_Please let me explain" Akiko said "I'm sorry for surprising you all for this especially Tsukimori-kun" she glanced at him who made me jealous of somewhat "You see Ms. Hamai didn't formally discuss about this she only me and my parents knew, me and Tsukimori-kun have been childhood friends and we were always spend the day playing our violin right Tsukimori-kun?" He nodded _

"_But I still don't understand the whole engagement thing" Hirara was scratching his head _

"_My parents have already decided for me to get married before I turn 17 and since he knew how Tsukimori-kun is a very determined person towards his music what more if he was over me?" she gave him a smile which made him blush "So father suggested an engagement for me and Len" looks at him "Is it alright if I call you that? You will be my husband anyway" she asked. In my thoughts I was thinking 'what?! His husband? This can't be happening' _

_Len was still in shock but gave his answer "I won't mind…Akiko" _

"_Great! But now you know that we are engaged in spite I don't have any ring but that can be settled soon are you mad for not knowing earlier?" _

_He was quiet for a while "Yes I am for my parents not having me a say in their plans for 'my' future" he answered with dismay _

"_I see, but you knew that this was coming right?" she said _

_He gave out a sigh "Yes" _

"_Wait? Now I'm totally confused" Ryoutaro groaned me and Fuyuumi-chan just looked at each other _

"_You see" he started out "My parents were planning that I should get married at 17 but I still didn't agree with the thought of it I was still young to have a family and a wife, I didn't know how to handle much expenses and with that great responsibility towards a woman but they didn't consider that as a good excuse I had to argue over that, they were already hiring some candidates but I never expected it to be…Akiko" looks at her "We were just friends…nothing more" he gave out another sigh "Why did you agree to this?" he asked her _

"_Because I like you!" she said without hesitation just straight out _

_End of flashback _

Ever since then, they were always together like eggs and ham they never were apart the way she confessed to her made it sound so easy why didn't I do that before? Why would I still hesitate about attempting to tell him the truth, she did it straight out not even being a nervous wreck. I knew that tears were about to come out but I held them back, I didn't want to cry anymore I couldn't take it anymore.

Does Tsukimori-kun even love Akiko-san? I'm sure off that, I mean if he didn't he would have canceled their engagement already, they wouldn't be walking to school, they wouldn't be having lunch together or play duets together during breaks if he didn't love her and I'm 100% sure that Akiko-san loves him as well.

I walked along the streets and making my way to school, I looked up and saw the beautiful blue sky birds were flying up above me and forming a v shape I gave out a smile but that smile didn't contain any happiness I just did that to make myself better and to not feel the pain I needed to be strong. I'm a few feet from the school's gate and I just stood there with my head low I looked like a statue, I couldn't move my feet I wanted to return home and lock myself in my room and just sit in one corner and cry, cry, cry that's all I can do right now I'm helpless. Then I felt a hand on my shoulder I looked up and saw Hirara

"Don't just stand there like a statue c'mon you'll be late for class" he gave me smile but that wasn't the smile that I longed for

"I-I'm sorry, Hirara-san you want to walk together?" I asked and gave out a fake smile

"Sure" he said with full of glee. Kazuki was a person that never failed to always cheer me up, he was always there by my side like Ryoutaro and the others they were always there for me to keep me company they were my loyal friends or should I say best friends

We walked together inside the building and as I entered the nightmare begun. There they were her hands wrapped around his arm and they were walking together looking like a happy couple glued together and can't be separated I knew that he was already happy with her and he didn't need me anymore he already has someone to love him and to take care of and she was already the one, she had everything: Riches, fame, beauty, talent and she was intelligent and smart not to mention she was fun and a sunny person like me but still….we were different I will never be like her and will never be the person whom he will love for the rest of my life. When I thought of that I just bowed my head and my chest became heavy and my heart was aching I knew that it was already being hammered into pieces I felt that every night and day.

"Don't worry Hino-san; I'm always here for you" I heard it and lifted my head to him

Again he gave out a smile "Me and the others will always be at your side we will never leave you" on him saying that made me feel lighter and the pain was slowly starting to ease "A-arigatou, Hirara-san" I gave him a smile, this time a 'real' smile "I know that you guys will never leave me" I said

"And remember, if you have any problems feel free to approach us anytime ok? Don't be to timid about it" he reminded me, I gave him a nod

I waved to him as we parted ways and I was entering my classroom

"Good morning Kaho-san!" Two girls greeted me as I made my way to my seat

"Good morning Mio, Nao" I greeted them

"Well your early today Kaho-san" Mio said

"Yes, I agree when did you become an early bird?" Nao teased

"I'm not always late you guys!" I blurted out, they just laughed

"Hey! What's so funny?!" I gave them a what's-so-funny look

"Sorry Kaho-san we just never expected that you would look so cute when you're angry" she gave a slight giggle

"Forgive us, Gomen we just want you to lighten up a bit Kaho you have changed ever since you know what happened. I was silent then Mio took my hands and held them tight

"We are your friends and we want you to be happy Kaho-san we hate seeing you always crying and frowning right?" Nao nodded

"And besides you don't look pretty when you frown you should smile always" she said, I pouted

"Aww, c'mon Kaho it's early and you give us a pout?" Mio said

"Well you guys didn't give me a nice morning…."

"Of course we did! We always do! We did that to make you smile Kaho stop being a party pooper and give us a smile!" she was commanding me

"Please Kaho-san, just one smile I'm sure you'll feel better" Nao said to me

"Please!!!" Mio looked at me with those 'puppy dog' eyes whenever she did that I would always give in

I just sighed and gave them a simple smile

"Do it like you mean it" Nao told

"Fine, fine I will" I groaned, and gave them a sweet smile even though I didn't mean it just to satisfy them

"That's better" they both hugged me, I was surprised at first but hugged them in return I was lucky to have great friends like them all of them and I love them

"Alright class to get the square root….." (And so on….can think of a good lesson so just picked math…even if I hate it. Gosh!)

Its math already our first period, God I hate math (just like the author haha!) I hate the teacher, hate the lessons, I hate numbers and my mom suggesting I should take Business management as a course in college which you handle all those finance and such. How could I handle finance if I couldn't even handle my own allowance in my piggy bank and spend it with nonsense things that I find so interesting and me to handle a thousand Yen (or whatever the currency is in Japan I dunno) what would you think I'm going to buy with a thousand cash? Or a million?! Mom can never get me sometimes but she could almost read my mind, maybe it's a mother's instinct. I just sat there in my seat pretending to listen to my Math teacher as he scribble numbers on the board; I just stared at it blankly as my thoughts were flying to someplace else "Class get out your notebook and copy the equation" Sensei ordered, I took my notebook on my bag and opened it to a fresh new page I took my pen and started copying it "Eh? This is so hard" I thought, well it is since I didn't pay any attention in class anyway I'll manage somehow…I think

I started writing down the numbers "1209 square root of blah…blah" then without any notice I suddenly wrote down his name on my notebook and decorated it with hearts all over when I cam to my senses I scribbled out the name and crossed it out 'What was I just writing?!' I ripped the paper and crumpled it "Anything wrong Kaho?" Nao asked who was sitting behind me "No, I'm fine" I made it sound like a whisper for sensei not hearing us or else we were in trouble. After copying the equation I closed my notebook and placed my hand under my chin and stared outside the window.

Why was I still thinking about him? He is about to get married, he doesn't need you anymore Kaho he has someone else just get over it already!? I was shouting in my mind, my brain is telling me to forgive and forget but my heart indicates something else it tells me to fight what I love, have the courage to confess to him you just can't turn your back now go fight for him! Fight? How can I? I am a weak girl who plays the violin not that pretty nor that rich, I'm just an average school girl to him and compared to her? It was like comparing a peasant and a princess, I am weak and she is almighty, she is rich and I am not, she has everything and all I have is an empty pocket, she is respected by people while people would still criticize me for my playing. So he wouldn't have second thoughts on agreeing to the marriage and the engagement. Again my chest felt heavy and my heart was aching I could feel tears in my eyes but it wasn't the right time to cry not in school not with all these people who will just make fun of me, Be strong Kahoko! Be strong!

"RIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGGGGGG" The school bell 'Saved by the bell!' I said in my mind, I got up from my seat and stretched out my arms and gave out a yawn "Waahh…"

"Are you tired Kaho-san?" Mio asked me

"Just a little sleepy Mio" I replied

"Well you did wake up early, earlier than your alarm clock to trigger right?" Nao said

"Yeah, you're right" I gave another yawn "So shall we eat?" I asked both of them

They nodded, I took out my lunch and the 3 of us exited the room to eat at the table where we usually gather with Fuyuumi-chan and Amou-san

"Finally, you came! I am starving already!" Amou-san whined

"Sorry for the wait you guys, our Math teacher gave us some out of this world lessons and assignments it made our head explode" Nao reported them

"Well, s-shall we start?" Fuyuumi-chan asked us

We all nodded and sat at the table took out our lunch and started our conversation

"Hey, Semestral Break is near what do you guys think of a good vacation?" Amou-san asked she always wanted plans to be set out straight and at the last minute

"Hmm…well what about the beach? That's nice right?" Mio suggested

"That's so old school Mio let's have a new gig" Nao disagreed, yeah she was right we would always go to the beach every vacation and emphasis on the _every. _

"Let's plan something different for once" Amou-san said

"I-I know…." Fuyuumi-chan spoke up "W-we could all stay at my Villa f-for the whole semestral b-break a-and we could do some o-outdoor activities and could have some s-slumber parties and such"

We were all silent about her idea

"Great Fuyuumi-chan!" Amou-san hugged her

"That's such a great idea! We can do some camping, and parties and more since you're villa is like a huge mansion" she said with a wink

"But is it alright if we stayed at your villa?" Nao asked

She nodded "My parents will be out of town for a business trip and I'm sure they won't mind if you guys stayed at my villa they will be pleased with that…since" she grew silent

"Since what?" Amou-san asked her in chorus

"W-well…" her face turned red "S-since you are t-the only f-friends that ever v-visited the place a-and I am m-more than glad that y-you would agree"

"Awww…Fuyuumi-chan" Mio gave her a sweet look "Of course we would! We wouldn't miss it for anything!" she smiled at her

"Right, that would be very nice Fuyuumi-chan!" said Nao "don't you think Kaho-san?" glancing at me. I was just silent

"Kaho-san" I was just quiet

"Kaho-san!" she shouted, I was startled and came to my senses

"S-sorry I was thinking about something, what were we talking about again?" I was thinking about Akiko-san and Tsukimori-kun again

Amou-san gave out a sigh "About spending the whole vacation at Fuyuumi-chan's Villa she will be very glad if all of us came" she explained, I looked at Fuyuumi-chan

"Is it alright?" I asked her

"Yes, very much" she smiled at me "W-will you join us Kaho-san?"

All of them were looking at me and anxious to hear my answer

I gave a little laugh "Of course Fuyuumi-chan I will absolutely join you" I gave a smile

"Great! But we shouldn't just keep this to ourselves you know we should let the others know about it was well" Amou-san popped out another idea as always we were just all confused

"Huh? Who 'others' are you talking about Amou-san?" Mio looked confused

"You all know what I mean like Hirara-san and the others" she gave us a familiar look

"But then, that would also include…." They all turned to me, then in an instant I knew what they meant

"Will it be alright for you Kaho-san to invite them?" Fuyuumi-chan asked me in worry

I was silent and didn't give any reply

They all paused and our group became quiet silence fell upon us

'_Should Tsukimori-kun and Akiko-san join us?'_ I asked myself '_it would be so selfish of me to just say 'no' for an absurd reason, what's it going to be Kahoko? Make a choice already' _

"If you don't want to Ka-"

I broke Amou-san's sentence "It'll be fine, Amou-san I wouldn't mind if Akiko-san and Tsukimori-kun came along" I forced a smile

"You're lying Kaho-san we could tell" Nao looked at me, she knew me too well

"You shouldn't force yourself in doing this just for him, he was the one that made a mistake don't blame yourself" Mio was trying to get my hopes up but it didn't work

I bowed my head

"Maybe i-it wasn't a good idea" Fuyuumi-chan sounded hurt

"No! No! Fuyuumi-chan it was a good idea, let's just make it a girls vacation no boys that way we won't have to worry too much huh Kaho-san?" Amou-san said

My head still low and didn't utter a word, I was silent

"Let's just think of another trip!" Nao suggested

"No!" I lifted my head up to face them "Please don't worry about me to much"

"But Kaho-san…." Amou-san started

"Stop it" I trailed her off her sentence "I know you guys are trying your best to make me feel better and I thank you all for that, I am glad that you are all here and the idea was great we should have a vacation at Fuyuumi's villa all of us should be there even Akiko-san and Tsukimori-kun, I know it still pains me that I cannot accept that they are happy with each other and love each other I will never change that between them I could never interfere"

"But you love Tsukimor-kun" Mio trying to argue

"Even if I do love him he can never love me for his heart has longed for someone else and that 'someone' is and always be Akiko-san, Akiko is a kind person and I am sure that she will take good care of him like I would and this is the best way to get over Tsukimori-kun no matter how badly it hurts me I can still manage that pain inside of me because I know I have loving friends like you" I glanced at them and I continued "The heart is never fair, so is life it's just a balancing act it's a cycle you fall in love get hurt and move on you will do the same thing over and over again what's the difference?"

"The difference is" Amou-san exclaimed "that even if you say that you have moved on the heart will always say different meanings from the brain what you're saying is your mind speaking and not the heart Kaho-san"

"_Is it true? Is it my mind talking and not my heart?" _

I was silent and just stared at my lunch that was already half finish _is it what my heart says? To move on and just let go off the past?_

"We're sorry Kaho-san for ever brining up the topic" Fuyuumi-chan apologized. I look at all of them with a straight face "I know you guys won't believe me that I am alright with having Tsukimori-kun and Akiko-san stay with us during the break but I can't run away forever right? You guys all know that I would have to face this and this may be the solution to that and all I ask is just for your consideration and just bare with me" I was already pleading to them about the idea I was nearly teary eyed

They all looked at one another and Amou-san gave out a brief sigh "Alright Kaho-san, if this is what you want then all we have to do is just approve it and we will be at your side no matter what" I smiled big "Yes, and if anything happens bad we will be here all the time no worries" Mio hugged me and I did so in return, I am glad that they understand me with my decision they are all very understanding. I faced them "Thank you very much" I stood up and packed my lunch "Let's go before class starts again"

"Aren't you going to practice Kaho-san?" Nao asked me, I turned to her "Maybe later when I'm all spirits again" then I walked away not even giving a smile as I leave, am I this helpless? Isn't there anything I could do to help myself? I pity myself so much; I am a poor girl who only wishes to have the guy he loves in his arms and to caress his beautiful and handsome face

"_Because I like you!" _it still haunts me in my head she confessed to him and didn't care if we were there, if _I _was there but it bothers me so much. Her first day of school and then she just blurts out to him that she like him? I hate her! Wait, why do I hate her? no I didn't have the right nor the privileged to hate her absolutely not he isn't mine, he _never_ was mine nor never will be mine, she owned him and she will love him no matter what.

I am just a foolish high school girl who is dreaming of having what she wants but somebody already took it, what else was I suppose to do?.....but cry

Chapter 1 done! There are more okay so just wait, school will be very busy now so I hope I could finish it in time….and please give me reviews (honestly) thanks!

-moonshine-79


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2, ok please tell me if I am such a bad writer….I am new with this stuff but please enjoy…and don't forget the reviews……thanks again! And thanks for the reviews…..I can't quite classify you all but if you are reading this: thanks for the reviews:] **

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Chapter 2

"I really missed this place….ahhh" Amou-san said as she inhaled the fresh air, all of us were standing outside Fuyuumi-chan's villa this is where we will spend the entire Semestral Break, a great place to kick off all the exhaustion and headache from school I want to spend the break anywhere but at home I don't want to spend my school break just up in my room and seeing the same corners everyday, I have to escape and this was the solution to all that, I didn't mind spending time with family it's just that I always do that everyday and I also need time to associate with my friends and just have the time of our lives even though I know that I will have my heart crushed at the same time.

"This place is very big and beautiful Fuyuumi-chan" Akiko-san said as she was still observing the place and looking around "T-thank you Akiko-san" Fuyuumi-chan gave her a smile and so did she.

I never thought that she would agree to us on coming here and spend the school break with us, I know it still bothers me that she is wearing an engagement ring on right hand but it would be impartial of me if I just had invited Tsukimori-kun, she is pat of the group now and even though it hurts I have to just accept her

"I missed this place as well" a familiar voice said behind us, it was very familiar we all turned around and shock to see that it was Kanazawa-sensei_ what is he doing here?_ I thought. We were all silent and well also in surprised to see him, he looked….different he doesn't look like the teacher we have anymore he somewhat looks younger, he shaved, with much shorter hair now and his clothes: he is wearing green baggy pants with black sandals and a shirt that says 'Forever Young' now when does a teacher have that kind of fashion sense? He looked really…handsome if you describe him in first sight and has he been working out? He was so fit

"You guys are mean say something to me it's like you've seen a ghost" he said playfully as he approached us, we were still confused

"K-Kanazawa-sensei…i-is that you?" Hirara-sempai asked him who was unsure if it was really Sensei.

He chuckled "Well who else do you think I am? George Clooney?" he joked with us and laughed but we just remained silent

"Well we never expected you to be here sir" Akiko-san said and I agree we didn't invited him "I know you guys are all surprised by me just showing up and that's all thanks to Azuma here who invited me" he exclaimed and we all glanced at him

"Well don't be mad at me, we should invite sensei after all besides what's wrong with having some parental guidance around?" he laughed

"Parental Guidance? Who said about that?" Sensei said rather surprised more than us "I'm here to have some fun too like all of you guys, I know I'm still your sensei but teachers need some off too you know"

We all looked at him Mio and Nao still looked very confused

"Well then teach since you're here having a grown up won't be so bad….I guess" Kazuki rolled his eyes

"Hey sir have you been working out?" Tsuchiura-kun asked him

"Me? Well just some morning jog that's all…." He replied _Morning jog huh? Well seems more than that_ I said in my head

"Well we can't just stand here all day let's get going!" Tsukimori-kun said he sounded rather impatient "Don't ruin the beautiful day with that attitude of yours Len, be nice" Akiko-san tried to lecture him and as I watched them it made me feel so envious if I have only told him sooner I might be the one wearing the ring she is right now _if I could just start things all over again then that would be for the better. _I had to shake of those thoughts, this is the time I would have to move on with my life and forget about the man I have to start over again that's right be the old Kahoko Hino who is a jolly person before all of _this_ happened just forgive and forget just remember that Kahoko and you can make it through

"Are you alright…Kaho-sempai?" I heard a sleepy voice, I turned to my side and saw Shimizu-kun, he still has a sleepy look on his face and his eyelids looks so heavy and his golden hair with shiny sapphire eyes he looks so much like an angel.

I replied with a smile and said "I am alright, no worries"

"Alright guys, let's not waste anymore time before other unexpected things happen" Amou-san told us and she opened the door, we stepped in the villa it still is beautiful and elegant as always, nothing has really changed much ever since the time we had training camp

"Wow, Fuyuumi-chan and I thought the outside was beautiful" Akiko-san looked at the place with amusement and delight and I saw Len just observing her beautiful face and I saw that their hands were intertwined

Again my chest felt heavy and I felt the pain again, I know I have to move on but the more I try the more I still feel the pain why can't I just let it go? Is this how love really works, the others have the love of their life in their arms while the other suffers and watch them be which it should have been them? This is torture….I tightened my fist and just looked away _Let it go Kahoko, Let it go_ I kept repeating those words in my head to let my chest feel a little lighter

"Well we should be assigning our roommates now huh sensei?" Azuma glanced at Kanazawa-sensei

"Me? Well you kids planned it out how should I know" he shrugged his shoulders and he was acting like his youth, what happened to this guy? He totally is different from the teacher we know

"What happened to the strict teacher we know?" Tsuchiura-kun gave him a playful look

"Ok let me set it straight" sensei began "1. I told you I am having like a day off with you guys and 2. I am not strict it's a good thing I didn't stop you kids from doing this without my permission" he gave us a strict look

"Well you're here now and since you tell us that, fine we'll be assigning the roommates ourselves" Amou-san declared, I grabbed her arm

"What are you doing? How can you assign us roommates?" I doubted her

"Are you worried because I would let Tsukimori-kun and Akiko-san in one room?" she asked me, I was just silent and I was guilty _am I worried?_ Was just lowered my head then I felt both of her hands on my shoulder I lifted my head and she gave out a smile

"I know what you feel Kaho, I'm not just doing this because I like bossing these guys around I'll also do it as a favor to you, remember that" she gave me a wink and I don't know whether it was right. _Should Amou-san do this? _

"What do you say Kahoko? Do you agree?" she asked me, I was surprised that she called me by my first name she rarely would call me that

"I…." I was saying in a whisper "I….don't think you should do it" I finally said

She froze for a while

"What? Are you saying it's alright for me to let them be assigned in one room?" she gasped at me to hear such a thing

"Well I think it's wrong to keep them apart just because for my sake and even if you do so I would still feel uncomfortable for you doing this" I said to her

"But Kaho….what you are doing will just make things more complicated" she was arguing with me, I hate it when people argued with me

"Look Nami…ju—"I was cut off when someone butted in with us

"How long will you girls talk this over?" Kanazawa-sensei asked us, we were both quiet "If you are having a hard time then I'll help you with it" he sighed and looking quite annoyed

"Well don't be annoyed you should be the one doing this since you are the adult here" Amuo-san crossed her arms "Hey, you listen young lady you should respect me here I am still a teacher" he declared

"And you said you weren't a strict teacher" she turned her back on him and still arms crossed"

"Why you—"

"Whoa…okay guys stop the fighting, just assign us roommates already for us to relax" Hirara-sempai managed to cut off the tense moment between them

Amou-san and Sensei just exchanged glances at each other

"We don't have all day you two" Azuma told them with an impatient tone, they just both sighed "Fine, fine we'll get started" Amou-san said and stuck her tongue out to Azuma which all made us giggle.

They talked it over for 15 minutes; my legs were trembling from the _trip how can you be so tired by just sitting in a car? _My butt was sore for sitting for an hour or so, once we would have arrive I thought I good just throw myself on a soft bed but we still have to be assigned with our roommates, which should have been done while we were in the car.

All of us were just standing there and waiting, good thing that I could wait this long or else I would have just anybody's arm and dragged them to a room myself and I wouldn't care who that person would be…"Do we have to wait until sunset?" Hirara-sempai whined

"Okay the decision has been made Hirara-sempai happy now?" Amou-san looked at him

"Yes I am and I would be much happier if I could relax" he whined more

"Quite the whining we're done already…shees" she gave a stressed expression which all made us laugh again

"Let's start before anyone whines again….For the boys: Kazuki and Azuma, Keiichi and Ryoutaro, Len and Sensei…"

"Why do I have to roommate with Kananzawa-sensei?" Len said with disagreement with the assignment

"It's my choice Len so just go with it" he just simply told him, since he couldn't argue with a teacher he just gave out a brief sigh

"For the girls…." She continued "Kahoko and Shouko, Mio and Nao and lastly me and Akiko" she gave out a playful smile to Akiko

"Wait" Akiko spoke up "I think it would be much better if Len and I shared one room together"

_One room? One room?! You have got to be kidding me! Who does she think she is? Their not even married yet for god's sake _I was screaming that in my head, my temperature was rising.

"I know that you and Tsukimori are engaged but I still think that it is not proper that you 2 should be sharing on room together, you are allowed if you are in marriage but since you are not it will be unethical if the both of you did so" Kanazawa-sensei exclaimed and gave out a strict look on the both of them, Akiko-san was just silent and didn't say a word

"Alright, now that you know you're roommates you are free to choose any room you like"

Then I felt someone holding my hand and I noticed that it was Fuyuumi-chan "Shall we choose a room now Kaho-sempai?" she asked me and I nodded, I followed her to the halls and there were different doors

"Which room?" she asked me

"Um, I think you should choose Fuyuumi-chan I am not really familiar with the place" I replied to her

"Alright then" we both stopped at a wooden door, I reached for the knob and opened the door, it was the same room as before just like training camp but instead of 1 bed there are 2 beds now which mean it won't be so hard for us to sleep unlike last time.

We both stepped in and I sat at the side of the bed near the balcony, I looked out and it was a beautiful site I could see the ocean from here as the waters sparkle like crystals.

I lazily lied on the bed and let my body relax, I was tired…obviously I could just lie in bed all day

"Aren't you going to unpack Kaho-sempai?" Fuyuumi-chan asked me

"Maybe later Fuyuumi-chan…waahhh" I yawned "I don't think I have enough energy to do that, is it alright if I took a nap?" I glanced at her

She nodded "Of course, Kaho-smepai can take a nap as long as she wants it doesn't bother me" she replied with a smile

"Thank you Fuyuumi-chan" I said, she was already placing her clothes in the drawer

I comfortably positioned myself in bed and closed my eyes as I fell asleep.

(A/N: I am not in a mood to write about her dream so let's just skip that part shall we? I am lazy doing this part so sorry for the mistakes or errors)

I woke up and gave out a yawn, I still could see the room in blurs I rubbed my eyes and blinked a few times, this time I could see much clearer I am still lying in bed and the room was dark I turned to the other side of my bed and looked out the glass door of the balcony it was already dark and the stars are shinning brightly and the ocean gave out the color navy blue I looked at up the ceiling, I didn't want to get out of bed yet, I still feel sleepy but I can't sleep all day I should be out there having fun with my friends, I'm a teen and that's what teens to best: having fun and enjoying life that's what I want, despise the thought on how Tsukimori-kun thinks of his youth all he cared about was his violin and his music he was always impassive and he rarely would socialize with us, I badly wanted to change him but I didn't have the courage I was scared that he would just turn me down and he would just think that I am useless of his time as always, but ever since Akiko came he changed, he became softer and he was more open to us than before. He was changed because of love, and when I knew that the he changed because of Akiko that was because he _loved _her and he didn't feel the same way about me. I could feel the tears in my eyes and wishing that I was that person that have changed him I didn't want to cry but I can't help it love is a torture and it is also a sacrifice I know I can't move right now because as long as I can feel my love for him, I can still feel the pain.

I sat at the side of my bed and looked at the clock that was at the side table that separated the 2 beds together, it was already 8:09pm _did I sleep that long? _I stood up and fixed the bed, I stepped out of the room and I saw the hallways that was filled with lights and beautiful chandeliers _Fuyuumi-chan really is rich _I walked down the hallow halls and made my way down the stairs, I looked out the window and there I saw everyone at the garden circling the fire and sitting on logs and with what I expect I decent dinner inside the villa at the table with exquisite cuisine and really delicious food but all they eat is just barbeque and grilled patties Mr. Kanazawa was frying the meat, they were all laughing and exchanging stories I smiled to myself and thinking even though I don't have the man I love with me I still have these great friends.

Then I fixed my gaze on Tsukimori-kun, he looked handsome in his white polo and the 2 upper buttons open revealing his upper chest it was hot just looking at them and him with black fit pants and his blue hair he looked so perfect and didn't have to wonder why I fell in love with him, I was foolish; I scanned the garden and there I didn't sight Akiko-san she wasn't there sitting beside Tsukimori-kun as I expect she would be they were inseparable it was hard for her keeping them apart _Where could have she gone to?_ I wasn't concerned about her, well maybe just a little but I was curious on where she could be right now. When Tsuchiura-kun saw me by the window he smiled at me and gave me a wave I too wave back the others looked at his direction and also saw me I couldn't hear what they were saying but by telling on how their lips move Amou-san was saying "Come over here" I gave a nod and headed to the garden, it was a beautiful night and it was cold I approached them and I could feel the warmth of the fire embracing my body

""Hey, Kaho-san your awake! I thought you would never get up" Hirara-sempai teased me, Amou-san slapped his arm and he gave an "Ow"

"Seriously Hirara-sempai quite with the jokes already can't you see the girl was tired and needed some rest" we all laughed so did I, he was rubbing his arm from Amou-san's slap

"I didn't know sorry Kaho-san" he apologized to me," No need to apologize Hirara-sempai" I said

"Take a seat Kaho-san" Fuyuumi-chan offered me I looked at them and looks like there wasn't enough space for me to fit in, I can't just squeeze myself in

"Looks like there's not enough space I could ju—" "Sit here" I was cut off from my sentence when Tsukimori-kun offered me the empty space beside him, I was surprised to let him do that I know that it was intended for Akiko-san but he shouldn't have offered the to me

"Its fine I'm sure that Akiko-san is sitting there I could just grab a chair" I said to him

"Akiko needed to assist a few things in her room so she won't be able to spend the time with us so this space is free" he exclaimed to me, I was glad that he offered me to sit there which was surely for _her_ I just nodded and sat beside Tsukimori-kun and Shimizu-kun who, as always has a sleepy face on

"You slept for hours Kaho-san" Mio told me, "I know I guess I was too tired from the trip" my face was starting to turn red from embarrassment since it was our 1st day here and I would sleep like a bear

"Yeah well we all are tired from the trip, you must be hungry….here have some burger" Hirara-sempai offered me a plate which placed there a scrumptious looking burger and I could smell the yummy aroma but even though I slept for hours I didn't feel hungry at all

"Thank you sempai but I am not in the mood to eat right now maybe later" I refused

"Really? Are you sure? You slept for like 10 hours I'm sure you must be starving" Nao said, I shook my head "No, surprisingly I'm full thanks anyway" I just gave them a smile

"What did you eat for breakfast? A cow?" Tsuchiura-kun joked around and we all laugh even me "I'm just not hungry" I simply told them

"Anyway, more for me" Hirara-sempai said as he took a big bite from the burger and chewed with delight and swallowed "This is great! I could eat 5 more of this are you still making some sensei?" he asked, Sensei turned around wearing an apron and holding a spatula "Take it easy Kazuki you just had 3 of these save some for the others will ya?" he said again we all laughed, and I felt happiness and joy as we all sat by the campfire it is really great having these guys around.

Hours passed and we spent the whole night laughing and talking I forgot that I was sitting beside Tsukimori-kun, my stomach had an unpleasant feeling inside and felt the butterflies inside it I was still nervous around him. I noticed that Akiko-san hasn't returned yet _what happened to that girl?_ I looked at Tsukimori-kun and asked "Where's Akiko-san? It's been hours already for her still fixing something in her room" he faced me "She must be asleep by now it is late already" he said "Really? What time is it by the way?" I asked him, he looked at his wrist watch "12:17am" he told me "It's already midnight" I nodded "yeah, I'm sure she is asleep by now" I looked at the fire and just gazed at it and the flames, it was swaying as the wind blew; it was dancing with the wind and I looked up the sky it was beautiful; the colors of the grayish clouds and the dark blue horizon mixed and the stars twinkle and shine brightly in the heavens the tress dance as well like the fire as I continue to look up, and as I look up I wonder if the person up there right now could hear my heart cry and being destroyed, if they watch me every night cry and suffer and if they could here me now to grant my greatest desire that the man I am sitting beside him on my right could realize that he is sitting beside the girl he loves and not _her_, if he could just realize that he is making a big mistake and I know that this is not what he wants, I wonder if that person could hear me out and grant my wish to let a shooting star pass and may that shooting star be a loop whole to reach my greatest wish to _that_ person and if he does so grant it he will know how this will greatly change the rest of my life. Please whoever that person is up there I beg you to let a shooting star pass by and grant for what I have longed for please….father…hear me out. .

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**Okay…end of chapter…there are more please review! Thanks!**


	3. Chapter 3

**I present to you *drum roll* Chapter 3! Yehay! I managed to write this with my tight tutor schedule….I really going nuts now (not in the bad way) from the exhaustion so if there are any errors or mistakes please forgive me….review and enjoy people…and thanks to oreofudge'DD and to the others who read my stories you don't know how happy I am! Please enjoy the Chapter:]**

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Chapter 3

There I continue to gaze up in the sky and plead to my father to hear out my cry

"Kaho-sempai, you are spacing out" a sleepy voice said, Shimizu-kun who was at my side looking worriedly at me

"I am fine Shimizu-kun, please do not fret too much" I told him and gave him a smile, he just considering it returned to talking to Mio who was beside him

"Do you remember…." A voice said I turned to the other side and it was Tsukimori-kun talking this time "Do you remember when we played Ave Maria together?" he looked at me with those beauty of eyes he had, he spoke softly so that only the 2 of us can talk without anyone butting in with the conversation "Yes" I replied softly and this time looked at the fire not meeting his gaze

"You played so different back then" he said, this time I faced him "What are you saying Tsukimori-kun?" I gave him a confused look

"When we both played that duet, your heart was into playing and I could feel that passion of your Hino" _I wish for you to call me Kahoko _I said in my mind "But now….it's different" he trailed off

"How different?" I asked him "Your playing has become rough and when I hear you play you tend to always loose focus and I feel that you are depressed and somewhat….hurt"

When I he said the last word it was like lighting that had struck me, did he realize that I am hurt? Does he finally see that he being engaged has made me cry for all those nights?

Do you now realize the pain you have caused me Tsukimori-kun? How badly I wanted to say that to him, but all I did was gave out a laugh and said

"That is crazy talk Tsukimori-kun! I am feeling great, I am not hurt" I giggled but what I wanted to do was cry, I was lying to my own heart I can't show him that I was hurt or else that would be idiotic of me to cry on his shoulders while all of them were having fun "Stop lying Hino, I know you well when it comes to your playing and something is bothering you and I will be more pleased to help you what is bothering you?"

I was just silent I didn't want to answer that question because I know the words that will com out of my mouth is 'the both of you, you and Akiko-san you both bother me' but as far as I can go it was just stack up in my head and it will just remain in my head not slipping through my lips I cannot let him know that.

"It's time to sleep guys it's already 1:00am" my thoughts were cut off by Kanazawa-sensei,

"C'mon teach can't we stay a little longer?" Hirara-senpai asked him "We're not even tired"

"You guys are still kids and you need rest and sleeping late is not good for all of you" he told them, he took a bucket that was filled with water and dunk it to the fire which made it die and smoke traveled into the air, the place became dark "Now everyone off to bed" he ordered us as he pointed to the door, since he was out sensei all we had to is just obey, while Hirara and Amou-san stood up lazily they were being stubborn "You are such a party pooper Sensei!" Amou-san stuck her tongue at him which just made him chuckle

"Yeah, yeah go to bed now you brat"

"Who you calling a brat?! Why you…." She was about to charge him when Tsuchiura-kun and Hirara-sempai grabbed her arms which stopped her from hitting sensei, she was struggling with the 2 boys hands holding on to her arms

"Let me go! I'll give this guy a piece of my mind!" she was commanding them

"We can't do that, who knows what could happen in this time of day" Tsuchiura-kun said "Let's go to bed" the 2 dragged her in the villa

"Let me go! Let me go!" she was screaming, all of us were sweatdrop and looked at sensei

"Well goodnight" that was all he said and went inside the villa but he made sure first that Amou-san was already in her room

"Shall we rest Kaho-sempai?" Fuyuumi-chan asked me with tired looking eyes

"Yes, you seem very tired" she nodded, all of us went to our rooms and let the night pass into slumber.

I was there lying in my bed, I turned to my side and I could hear Fuyuumi-chan sleeping peacefully she wasn't snoring, I could here her breath; inhaling and exhaling she was really tired I never knew she could stay up that late at night, I am squirming in my bed and trying to sleep but I don't feel tired at all I just stared at the ceiling and knowing that I could not fall asleep, I decided to tour around the villa which was a huge, huge mansion so big someone could even lost in here.

A blazer is around my shoulders for it was a cold night I'm just wearing my night gown and slippers that kept my feet warm.

First I started with the practice rooms and decided to read about some history of great composers and musicians, since music is the only thing that can fill up my mind asides from Tsukimori-kun and Akiko-san. When I was walking I started to hear music but it wasn't just music it was the sound of the violin playing I heard the piece 'Ave Maria' I never thought I could hear that piece again since I didn't want to play it because I know it would just remind me memories on how we played together I just didn't want to doze off into my mind that someday he can be mine….but I will try. I followed the sound, when I came upon a clearing I realized that the sound came from one of the practice rooms my heart was beating fast and knew that, that was _him_ playing 'Ave Maria' I was nervous but how anxious I was on seeing him play since I haven't seen him in practice and that during lunch break he would always spend his time with _her_.

I peeked at every door and when I came to the last room, there I saw him with his perfect posture and the ways he plays, he blue bangs on his forehead and I watch them sway his muscular arms moving as he plays with elegance, good things no one is awake by this hour especially Akiko-san I wish she is sleeping like Sleeping Beauty not to be awaken by true love's first kiss.

I shut my eyelids and let the music flow to my ears _he should be asleep by now but instead he still has the energy to play at this hour_.

But honestly I didn't care all that matters to me is that I could hear his music and see him in that position, it also has been a long time since we played a duet together how badly I want time to start over again.

The music stopped and I opened my eyes, when I lifted my eyelids I saw him looking unto my direction and meeting my gaze me instead of just running away which is rude, opened the door and stepped into the room and clapped my hands

"That was great Tsukimori-kun, its been long since I last heard you played Ave Maria" I gave out a cheerful smile, which did him no good it just looks like he was irritated that I barged in and distracted his playing "It's late Hino, what are you doing here?" he asked me with his annoyed tone of voice. _You still treat me the same_ I thought

"I slept for 10 hours what makes you think I could sleep again for 8 hours? Besides I should ask the same to you" I crossed my arms, he gave out a sigh

"I'm not tired, and how am I supposed to sleep when sensei snores like a warthog it is completely bleeding my ears" I giggled when he mentioned that sensei snored like an animal "A little harsh aren't we Tsukimori-kun?" I said in a childish voice of mine

I walked to the window and rubbing my shoulders for warmth and looked at the moon

"Well you will say the same thing if you were his roommate"

I looked at him with a playful face "And when will that happen? Since he told us that a man and a woman cannot stay in the same room together unless they are married and since me and Sensei do not have any relationship that will never happen" I gave a smile and continued adoring the moons light that is beaming on my face

"Hino…" I heard his voice; I directed my body to him

"Yes?"

"Do you want to walk together?" he asked me with his head looking down on the violin

"Of course" I gave a smile

The 2 of us were at the balcony we were star gazing and hoping to see shooting stars which I ask for my father to let one pass by for it to be a loop whole on granting my request because I know this is the only way. We were 5 feet apart from each other and I could feel the cool breeze hitting my face and brushing away my hair

"It sure is cold tonight" I said to break the silence, he is a man of little words

"Indeed it is" was all he could say to me

"Tsukimori-kun…can I ask you something?" he looked at me with those golden eyes of his "What is it?" he asked

"D-do…y-you…d-do…" I was nervous _why am I asking this?_ "Do you love Akiko-san?" I said that fast and straight

He was still staring at me and I expect him to laugh regarding such a stupid question, of course it's obvious he loves her it's just that….it's so hard to believe that it is.

"Hino, why do you ask that question?" he must think I'm an idiot right now

"Um, that was stupid you love her I know that just forget about it" I looked away and I stared up into the heavens _I wish I never asked that, father please I need you right now I need your help _I was crying inside I could hear my heart in agony and sorrow, does this have to hurt this bad? Is this the pain how my mother lost father? I need guidance and advice but where can I seek that now? Knowing their wedding is settled in 2 months it is too late.

"There are things that are supposed to be avoided Hino" I heard him say "Right now, it would be best if I don't answer that" "O-okay, I'm sorry" "It's fine"

Did I hear correctly? That he wanted to avoid my question, but why? Doesn't he love her? Just yesterday they were holding hand in hand and exchanging passionate looks to one another it's just a simple question 'Do you love her?' he is hiding something and he doesn't want others to know, even to me…..can't he not trust me?

"Do you trust me?" I asked him _what are you doing Kahoko?_

He gave me a confused looks "what?"

"Do you trust me?" I repeated again, still looking at me blankly and obviously doesn't know what to say

"If you trust me Tsukimori-kun you can tell me anything, what is ever bothering you I will always be there to help you no matter what situation it is I want to help, I want to repay you from all those lessons you thought me and this is the only way I can I am not just your student but I am a friend and as a friend of yours I will be there for you….always" I managed to whisper the last word while saying all those stuff and thinking if I should put 'always' at the end

After saying all those things and him thinking maybe I was just tired and to walk me out, instead he gave me a warm smile with that smile I felt so light and relieved just to see him smile at me like that "Again, I will repeat: do you trust me?" I said in chorus waiting for his reply he laughed but in a friendly way

"After what you said to me? How could I not?" I smiled on hearing that from him he smiled at me back.

Then as we gazed at the star it was like my wish has been heard, we saw a shooting star

"Look Tsukimori-kun! A shooting star!" a pointed up at the sky with a big smile on my face knowing that my beloved father heard out my cry "thank you" I uttered the words from my mouth

"Let's make a wish, that what you do when you see a falling star right?" he told me, I nodded I closed my eyes and chanted my wish in my mind begging my wish to come true, I was being selfish at myself and I feel bad all the time whenever I think about it but I have to, being generous to much has can cause me too much harm I need to have a little sense of greed in me even the slightest bit.

When I was done I opened my eyes and saw the stars winking at me, I had a pleasant feeling

"What did you wish for?" he asked me

"Huh?"

"Tell me, what you wished for?" he asked me again

"I can't tell you that, or else it won't come true!" I said, he looked at me

"Do you trust me?" I was shocked on him asking me that "If you trust me Hino, then you can tell me" he was right, I can tell him because I do trust this guy

_What I wished for is something I always wanted, something I always longed for…and that something is you. Ever since that day you helped me fixed my violin when the strings broke, you just didn't fix that; you fixed something more valuable to me and that was my heart. I did my best to please you and never gave up because you told me too. I want to be like you and I want you to be mine I love Len why can't you realize that up to now that the only name my torn heart is screaming is you? I am trying my best to pick up those broken pieces and getting over you before the wedding, but stitching those pieces together will take more than days, week, months….it will take years of that. But clearly as you can see you are happy with Akiko and your happiness is good enough for me, all I have to do now is just bare the pain and let it sink in: sacrifice, I am all doing this for you….and then that can make me happy _

That's what I wanted to say to him, but instead "I wish for our friendship to last and grow deeper" I was lying

"I see, I could have wished something like that, but…mine is much deeper"

"And what is that?" I asked him

"To have the love of my life be with me always and to never leave me, even though I know that she is hurting" he looked at me

My eyes widened _what is he saying_ I am in shock, does he know that I love him and hurting? But how?! Did someone tell him? But who could it be? Amou-san?! No she would never do that to me, and so as the others. How did he find out?

"I like Akiko-san but, I cannot hurt her I know that she loves me and I cannot hurt a woman there are secrets I didn't tell her, on the point that she told me all of hers I like her, but I am not in love with her"

Wait, did I hear correct? Not in love with her? Impossible!

"What?! Of course you do! I can tell!" I blurted out

He shook his head "It may seem that way but I am doing that just because our parents set up an arranged marriage and I do not want to disappoint them and mostly Akiko-san, she is a friend and all will ever be….she can never have my heart" he gave out his usual expression, the old Len I knew

"I….I…don't understand, how can that be?"

He looked at me and reached out for my face he caressed it with his warm touch he then brush the bangs of my face and traveled his hand onto my head he lifted my face with this hand under my chin, my heart is beating fast…I didn't understand what was happening

He opened his mouth and said "I am in love with you….Kahoko"

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**End of Chapter 3! **

**I know there are mistakes….and it all happened so fast, but I stayed up until 4am to think about this I will right it down right away when I story hits me and don't care what the time is….so I hope you still like it even though it came so quickly…..Gomen!**

**Review please! **


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4! Sorry for the wait….I would like to thank all of my readers and especially to annalisemarie99 who beta-d my story! Thank you! Thank you! I am so happy, and also for the reviews they make my day great! Please Enjoy! **

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Chapter 4

I stood there and was dumfounding of what he said to me_ "I am in love with you…Kahoko…" _is this true? Is this a dream? No, it's not it is happening right here, right now I felt his hand on my hair and under my chin and I could feel my beating heart.

"I love you Kahoko, not a single moment passed without you in my thoughts" Lie. I know this is a lie I wanted him to tell me that but this is all wrong.

"No" I said as I stepped back "Your lying, you don't love me you love Akiko-san!" I said with anger without knowing why.

"I like Akiko-san but not as much as I love you" he was about to grab my arm but I pulled away my head looking at my feet, I wanted to cry

"No Len, if you loved me you should have been mine long ago" my tears traveled along my cheeks as I lifted my head to face him and to let him see the pain he had caused me "If you really loved me you shouldn't have been engaged to her, I wouldn't be here crying for you. You should have done what your heart told you to do, I watched you with her and I cried all those nights knowing that you can't be mine….why? Why didn't you tell me sooner so that I won't have to bare the pain anymore Len! Why?!"

I shouted at him, I cried some more I fell to the floor and sat to cry in front of him, I wanted to let him know all the mistakes and the regrets he has. "You made me suffer" I said in a soft voice, he stood there without saying a word I know that he was feeling guilty for me, I knew that I was right about the fact the should have told me sooner instead of now that I had spent all those nights sleepless and in pain. I faced him as I still sat there "Are you just going to stand there and say nothing like you always do?" I asked in a crossed voice, I was mad when he looked at me with apologetic eyes but he has to do more than that, he broke my heart and him just looking at me like that won't fix it "You crushed my heart Len!" I shouted and I wouldn't care if anyone would be awakened of my shout, still being silent I saw him tightening his fist and bowing his said "I'm sorry" he said

"Sorry won't do me any good now, that won't fix my heart" I bowed my head and cried my heart out, this time my chest pained more than ever than those past weeks I have never felt this crushed before.

He kneeled in front of me and I looked at him with my cheeks wet with tears, I felt his hand caressing my face and wiping my tears with his thumb, he hugged me tight and felt his warm body on me I buried my face on his chest and cried making his shirt wet

"I am sorry Kahoko, I never wanted this for you but this is true I love you" he whispered in my ear but I still was mad at him for doing this to me "If you did love me, I shouldn't be crying right now" I said to him, he stopped hugging me and he looked at me his hands holding onto my arms and he pulled me closer to him and he kissed me, he kissed me passionately I didn't know what to do so I closed my eyes and kissed him back, as I expected warm and soft lips just like I thought it would be. He deepened the kiss as I felt his tongue on touching my lips I placed my arms around his neck and his arms on my waist, we kissed for 30 seconds but it was almost forever to me I didn't want it to end.

"Isn't this what you want?" he asked me after the kiss.

"Yes, this is what I want but…..if you knew that you loved me you shouldn't have agreed with your parents to marry her"

"I know and I was foolish then and I could not handle situations like this and I am sorry for all the pain I have caused you Kahoko, but….I cannot refuse on marrying Akiko"

Is he still choosing her over me?

"But why? You said you love me but why still marry her? What is it that she has that I cannot give you?"

"I will and always love you Kahoko you know that, but this is a great deal for my parents and I have come this far just to back out, they will think of me as a disgrace"

"No they won't Len they are proud of you, they are and they will understand your decision because they know this will make you happy" I pleaded to him

"I am sorry Kahoko" he loosened his grip on me and stood up. I followed suit

"Please Len, don't leave me again just talk to th—"

"It is not that easy Kahoko!" he shouted at me I was in shock that he did "You are so avaricious Kahoko! This is not just about you! There are other reasons why I cannot just back out from the damn wedding! This is also for my family I am doing for! Stop thinking about yourself for once and consider others for once!" he was mad at me, did he just tell me that I am greedy? Is that what he thinks of me?

"Is that what you think of me?" I began to cry again "Selfish and heartless? Is that what I am Len?!" I shouted "You have no idea how my eyes had to pour out the tears in me, you do not realize all the agony I had been, the journey that I had to cross to just hear you say that you love me, those three words" my throat stiffened for I could not go any farther, I would tell him everything I wanted to say

"I love you Len and I am willing to wait for you! But after what you just told me, that wait is over!" it ached my heart to say that to him but it was what my heart tells me to say, I didn't deserve a person like him and so with me I scrammed and ran, I ran into the room and slammed the door shut and slid unto the floor and cried I heard Fuyuumi wakened and I knew that she saw me cry and she heard me, I felt her arms around me and hugged me I cried on her shoulders "He….he told me I was selfish" I said between tears she held me tighter "Love is never easy Kaho-sempai, nor isn't it selfish but the love you have for Tsukimori-kun…." I cut her off "No, Fuyuumi-chan….I have had enough of this" I said as I faced her, she was silent and I know that she was trying to figure out what I just said.

Silence fell on both of us. Then we both heard a knock on the door, we both stood up and fuyuumi-chan opened the door it was Amou-san, Mio and Nao all looking at me with me with worry. Fuyuumi-chan invited them in the room.

The 3 of them sat on my bed while I sat in the middle, burying my face between my knees and embracing my legs as I cried.

"We're sorry for what ever happened Kaho" Mio said in an anxious tone

"Did anyone else hear the shouting?" I asked them while wiping my tears

"We're not sure, but 'm positive that Akiko-san didn't she's still sound asleep in the room" Amou-san told me, I lied on my bed and sniffing

"Here you go Kaho-sempai' Fuyuumi-chan handed me out a box of tissues

"Thank you Fuyumi-chan" I got the tissue box and blew my nose, I was so pathetic

"I'm just a frail girl who just got her heart ripped out….again" I looked the ceiling, as I let my tears get back in my eyes I didn't want to be like this in front of them.

"What are you going to do now?" Amuo-san asked me, I faced them

"What I should have done in the first place: move on" I simply said

"You are just going to give up Kaho?" Mio was displeased with my decision.

I nodded "I can't just keep on waiting for nothing, I am tired and sick of crying and the anguish all the time, I need to let go" the three all looked at each other who gave out a frown, I knew what they were thinking. They are thinking that I am making the wrong decision which is written all over their face

"I need to heal" I started "You all think that I give up easily, unlike the old Kahoko who never gives up until she gets what she wants, but this is different; this is about love and love is never easy. If I don't heal then I don't learn." I forced a smile on my lips "Moving on is never easy, letting go is never easy but….when you love someone you have to learn to let go" I bowed my head and held on to the sheets of the bed, I felt arms embracing me

"We will always be here for you Kaho" Nao told me as the 3 hugged me

"Never forget that if you need a shoulder to cry on, ours are always available" Mio was trying to make me laugh, I just gave out a smile

"We will be there for you all the way no matter what" I thank all of them very much, they never failed to make me feel better I embraced them tightly and said "Thank you…for everything"

After that, we spent our 'girl moment' with fun topics and funny stories of each other.

This is it, the way it should be. I have spent those useless nights crying for you but now things will change I promise you it will, I will be strong and I can face a new tomorrow for me, I am healing but at the same time hurting this will past because I know fate will never let us be together you just are too good for me, Akiko-san does deserve you. I'm so stupid not having to realize that before _"I am sorry Kahoko"_ I am tired from all your sorry I can not take it anymore because that's what everybody says when someone hurts someone deeply when they know that they do not deserve the pain_._ This is how it will end; my love will just flow out of my heart like a water fall because this way….I can mend my broken heart.

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**End of Chapter 4! Ok Chapter 5 may take a while for another tutor week! Sick of it! Thank you again annalismarie99 and to all my readers!Please leave me reviews! ^^**


	5. Chapter 5

**I present to yuo Chapter 5, thank God it's done....i am sorry if the story happened so fast and if I am making things so dramatic...I just hop you all love it and would enjoy it! :] **

**THANKS TO ALL MY READERS AND ALWAYS...ANNALISEMARIE99 u have been such a great help to me! God bless you all^^ **

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Chapter 5

"Hurry up Kaho-san! I am starving here you know!" Mio whined while impatiently waiting for me to fix my things and get my lunch out of my bag. It was lunch break and we were back in school already, vacation is already over.

"I'm coming Mio, at least wait for me to get my food to eat" I told her with a smile

She pouted in response "My stomach can't wait any longer!" she said and pulled Nao's arm and mine as well, which surprised me. Before I knew, the next minute I knew we were in the school garden, I didn't even feel my feet on the ground I was shocked when I noticed that I was on Mio shoulders as well as Nao, we both looked at Mio who was panting from running _did she carry us all the way here? Man, she must be strong when her stomach's empty _

"Will you please put us down Mio?" Nao snapped at her, who did not like the feeling off the ground.

"Oh, sorry!" she did put us on the ground but not in a gentle way; my butt hit the ground hard which almost made me wanted to cry like a 5 year old, I rubbed it as I weakly stood up

"At least let us down _gently_!" I told her, as I continued to rub my rear end and Nao rubbing her head, I guess that hurt her more than the pain I had.

"What were you thinking?! Carrying us all the way here like that? What would happen if you tripped? Then all of us would have been in an accident" Nao began saying litanies to her which she just ignored and rolled her eyes, I on the other hand just laughed

"Can we just eat? I didn't drag you here for you to lecture me you know, I came here to eat because I am starving" she sat down on the bench and opened her lunch box, without a second to pass she ate like a bear just gobbling her food; we were both sweatdrop on seeing how she could act like when she really is hungry. It like she doesn't chew, she just swallows it's like she didn't eat for 2 months. What made her starve all of a sudden?

"Wow, Mio you eat like there's no tomorrow" Nao told her

"Yeah, what made you starve like this?" I asked as I sat down beside her and so did Nao and place a napkin over my lap

"I didn't eat breakfast today that's why I am this starved" she told us while as continues to eat her lunch

"Just that?" a looked at her, she nodded as she wiped her upper lip with her sleeve

"Honestly Mio! You act so not like a girl! You don't wipe your mouth with your sleeve, at least use a napkin!" Nao scolded her and wiped her mouth, Mio tried to jerk away but her hands on her were too aggressive and held onto her tight as she tried to clean the mess on her face, on seeing her struggle it made me laugh so hard that tears came out my eyes. I have never felt this good before, after all those night crying that all paid of to laughter and smiles.

That night that would always evoke my thoughts and made me feel so fragile and stupid,

I never thought that I was that helpless when I cried in bed with my friends along side with me witnessing my pain and sorrow. I never knew that love would be this complicated, this is the result I get when I try to get what I want knowing I could never have. That was the night I told him how much he made me suffer and how much love I had for him; so he did in return but in the end, despite on being a happy ever after for me and when I thought he would leave Akiko-san for good, matters just became worst for the two of us. _"You are so avaricious Kahoko! This is not just about you! There are other reasons why I cannot just back out from the damn wedding! This is also for my family I am doing for! Stop thinking about yourself for once and consider others for once!"_

The words he said to me on that night keep playing in my mind. Avaricious? He is still being the smart guy by giving me big words huh? Why couldn't he make it simple and easy by just saying greedy or selfish? But knowing that it would hurt me more if he said that, but it has the same meaning anyway so I don't see the point here, he still thinks I am so dumb. You are such a fool Len, for so many reasons why. On the same night I told myself that I have to move on from you and knowing that you will still marry _her_ in the end just because for what your parents what and what they will make you happy, but this isn't about them; this is about you they will just make things more difficult for you if you continue like this. I am asking myself to do something I cannot, and that is to get over you. Why is it so hard to just forget about you? All I have to do is forget everything about you. Everything. Your smile, your touch, you face, your playing, your music…..Damn! As I go on I find it so hard to forget about you more, what the hell is wrong with me?! Just stop Kahoko! Ok? Stop! Forget about that stupid boy! He isn't the person you want anymore, he isn't the man your heart calls out to…like before…. Sighs…I am fooling myself again, I have said that I wanted to move on so bad but my heart still tells me that there's hope, how is there hope when he is getting married in twi weeks, Akiko-san's parents decided to move their wedding before Len's 17th birthday. It's still sad to know that I can't do anything but watch the 2 say "I do" in front of the altar and I just pretending to be fine which I know I am absolutely not. When will this grief end for me?

"Kaho! Kaho!" I returned to my senses when Mio was calling my name and looking at me with worry "You're spacing out, anything wrong?" she asked me

I shook my head "I'm fine, let's just eat" I said as I took out my chopsticks and began to chew my food "Delicious!" I exclaimed after swallowing my lunch ,I saw 2 friends who were just looking at me

"What are you looking at?" I asked them, they both exchanged glances at other then faced me

"Are you sure you're ok Kaho-san?" Nao asked me

I swallowed my food before I could answer her "I told you that I am, isn't that enough for you?" I gave them a look.

"Well…no, something is on your mind" As like I said, she knew me too well

I smiled "Everything's fine guys, just enjoy lunch ok?" I began to eat my food again "Yummy" I said, but they were still looking at me with worry in their eyes

"What do I have to do to make you guys believe that I _am_ fine?" I told them, making it sound like a joke but they were serious about this

"Things will be better if you told us" Mio said.

I gave a sigh and was quite for a few minutes

"Why won't you just believe me?" I tried not to make it seem like pleading them, imploring them to understand "I told you that I am moving on from Tsukimori-kun and all the love I _had_ for him is now all gone, he is getting married and that is what he wants and I cannot stop him, no matter how hard I try" I bowed my head and stared at my lunch. I was lying my love for him isn't gone "I am no good for him, because I can never be like Akiko-san she is what he desires and what his parents what for him" I felt a hand on my shoulder, I turned to my side and it was Mio's hand on my shoulder

"But you are the one that Tsukimori-kun's heart desires Kaho, not Akiko-san and you know that" she was deep but she was right. I knew that he didn't love her and he loved me, but as he said he is not doing this only for himself but also for the sake of his family and I cannot argue with that knowing family first. I touched her hand that was placed on my shoulder and smiled.

"I know that Mio, Nao but this is what is best for him and knowing I can never be the 'best' I just have to forget that, ok?" I told them with pleading eyes just to let them understand me I wanted this to stop, once and for all. Releasing my grip on Mio hand and placed them down, I heard the both of them sighing in defeat and I felt her hand on my shoulder was gone, and they just continued to eat. Just stared at them eating quietly, knowing that they are worrying about me. I can't let this go on I am not the only one that can feel my pain but my friends as well. _I hate you Len! _

**A few minutes later **

"Geez, why did I have to be the one to carry this stuff to the principal's office? I am a girl he could have just asked a guy to do this. Does he not know my height? How does he expect me to see where I am heading with this pile in my hands?" I complained to myself as while carrying some papers to the principal's office, by all mean why did sensei pick me? He knows that I am so gawky and if I trip this will I fall to the ground embarrassing myself in front of others, I sighed as I walked to the halls.

When I reached the principals office, I stood in front of the door and my legs were trembling from the weight of the papers I was carrying.

_Curse you Sensei_ I said in my mind, I would get detention if he ever heard me say that, I knocked at the door and I notice the knob door opening and I saw a middle aged man with a black mustache, dressed in a black suit and wearing glasses, opening the door, He let me inside the office.

"You could place those papers on my table" he told me and I did as he told, as I placed them down, I wiped my forehead with my sleeve of my school uniform, glad Nao's not here or else she would scold me as well; she's acting like a mother to me and Mio.

"Thank you Miss. Hino" he said I faced him and bowed

"Your welcome sir" I said and stood up straight "I should be going now" I walked towards the door and reached for the knob

"Wait Miss Hino" I heard him say, I removed my hand on the knob and faced him

"What is it sir?" I asked him, he was fixing his glasses

"Have you heard about the wedding of Mr. Tsukimori and Ms. Sakamoto?" he asked me, my eyes widened on why he would ask me this it's not like he knows about me in love with him. Shit Kahoko! What are you thinking?! Keep yourself to mind will you!

I looked down at my feet because I might just cry in front of the principal, which is so stupid

"Yes, I do why ask?" I know that it's impolite talking to people without looking at them directly at the eye but I didn't want him to see my tears or cry which I might do, who knows.

"I don't know, I may be just wasting your time my apologies Miss Hino"

I lifted up my head "its fine Sir, I'll be going now" I forced a smile from my lips and stepped out of his office and closed the door; from outside I let my back lean at the door behind me. Why did I feel like crying when he asked me about Len's and Akiko-san's wedding? I thought I was in the process of moving on and letting go? What is wrong with me? Every time people around me mention about their wedding or even his name I just want to cry. _Get a grip Kahoko!_ I straightened my thoughts and walked through the halls of the building since the office is in the second building and the Gen Ed's building is the 4th building I should pass by the Music Department, I really don't want to but since it's connected I have no choice do I? I just gave out a sigh and continued to walk.

As I was in the music departments building the halls were empty _they must be in class _I thought and looked around it looked like a ghost town, as I walked by the stairs I heard music, the sweet playing of the violin…wait a violin? That couldn't be….

His music was so soothing and it filled my ears, it still is his same playing but different on how we played together at the villa at training camp. _What happened to you Len? _

I followed his music and just then did I notice I was in front of the door, the door where leads out to the rooftop and where he plays his music, I could here clearly right now I closed my eyes to just listen to him play _I miss you Len, please stop this nonsense_ why does my heart still call out to you even though all the anguish you gave me? Why? My hand was twitching and it wanted to reach for the door, what was I doing? I can't face him now it has been 3 weeks since I last spoke to him why choose now? When his about to marry….stupid!

But despite my what was in my head I obeyed what I wanted to do and I opened the door, and there my brown eyes so him….I stepped out and closed the door gently so that he wouldn't notice my presence and I am sure he is not aware that I am watching him play. He is standing there and with his playing he produces beautiful music from his very own violin, he strokes them with his bow and his muscular arms moving.

Why can't I be good as you? Even if I try hard, even if I practice day and night why can I not achieve your level? What do I lack from my playing that I cannot be as great as you…and as Akiko? Even though you teach me into playing, I am not improving you just say that I do to not hurt my feelings but I can realize that from myself that I am _not_ getting better at all, maybe this is the reason why you refuse on having me aside from her.

I closed my eyes.

That I am low class compare to you and your family, you as great violinist and your father and your mother the great Misa Hamai, and if you let me be apart of that family of your with great talent in music they would consider you a disgrace because you love a person like me, who has no talent at all even though how hard she may try she can't achieve that dream I am nowhere near you and Akiko. On the other hand, Akiko is great and almost good as you and this is the only way to please them by not letting a low class, no talent girl like me to be apart of that family instead of being proud of her, you just think of your own worries and problems; aside from the girl who had to cross great pain to just love you. Is that wrong? Loving you with all my heart and you repay me with anguish, I am not the one who is selfish here Len…..then the music stopped, I opened my eyes and then I saw those golden orbs of his looking at me with a stern face like the old Len before all of _this _happened.

"What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be in class?" he asked me in a cold tone as he slowly approaches me, I just stood there and like him giving no facial expression like he normally does

"So should you" I said and like him I gave no facial expression "I better go now, I just disturbed you" I was about to reach for the door but he grabbed my arm, which made me stop. "Let go off me" I told him, without looking at his face but he didn't let go, he held on to it tighter

"I said let me go!" I jerked my arm away and he removed his grip on me, and I just stood there like a figurine in front of him, I wanted so badly to cry again.

"Kahoko, please listen to me" he started to say "I know what I said about you at Fuyuumi's villa but I didn't mean ANY of them, I swear to God I was just confused and frustrated at the moment because there isn't a thing I could do to make you stop suffering and mine as well…I just…" he sighed "I'm sorry" he said in a whisper. I just looked down on the ground with my hand on my chest this time I had no choice but to confront him. I looked at him.

"I'm tired of all your sorry-s" I manage to say, he looked at me surprisingly giving me the expression 'what are you saying?' look. "How many times have you told me that your sorry but you won't cancel the wedding?! You don't mean your sorry-s because you still are engaged to her!" I took his hand and showed him the ring he was wearing in front of his face, a sign that he was engaged. I removed my hold on his hand.

"Why are you still doing this Len?" I asked him, as my tears have made its journey down my cheek "You know this is not what you want, what _we_ want and yet you still continue to be with her, why do it Len?" I couldn't bare the anger in me anymore

"Kahoko" he looked at me in the eye "I told you, it's not that easy this is not just abou—"

"No this is all about you!" I cut him off and shouted at him "You are worried that instead of marrying a rich girl like her you leave her because for a worthless player like me! You are worried that your parents would despise you for choosing me instead of Akiko! This is all about you Len! And do not deny that!" how badly I wanted to say that to him moments ago when I figured it all out, he was silent and just looked at me; the girl he said he loved is crying in front of him for the 2nd time because she was to helpless and to defenseless to have him. I cried so hard and buried my face in the palm of my hands and just sobbed, I felt him enveloping his arms around me and burry his face in my hair. How bad I felt for myself, I pity myself; why am I this weak? Why can't I fight for the man I love? Why?! Those were the questions that kept repeating in my mind.

"Please Kahoko, don't make things hard for me you know I love you and that would never change just understand me" he said in my ear

"I'm trying to Len, but do you understand me?" I asked him

"Of course I do all those misery you bear right now is just because of me and all the tears you she every night; I could never forgive myself for doing that to you Kahoko I should have solved things sooner in the past instead of our situation like this. Both of us are suffering, just seeing you cry breaks my heart."

"You know you are the only person that can mend my broken heart right?" I asked him

"Yes I know and I will mend that if I can get another chance to amend things" he looked at me, and my hand rested on his chest.

What did he say? Give him another chance? Would I give him another chance? What will I do? I know I still love him, but is he worth it to give him another chance? All this questions lurking in my head, what should I say to him? No, say No Kahoko just say No; one part tells me to just give up. Yes, you know you still love him and he does love you too go on say Yes; while one part was considering this, Which is right? What should I choose?

I broke our embrace and took a few steps back and lowered my head tightening my fist and with the words coming out of my mouth.

"I'm sorry Len but, I….I can't" what?! Why am I saying this…No, this is not right Kahoko

"What are you saying Kahoko? I love you and you know how well you mean to me"

I was silent.

"Please Kahoko, I will work things out; give me one more chance please" he is begging to me

"I really can't Len" I faced him

"Why not?" he asked me

What are you saying Kahoko? You do not want to say this, why are you telling him this? What is going on with you?

"I…I just….d-don't love you anymore…I'm sorry" I finally said and ran away leaving him behind crushed and I know he will leave with guilt all his life for the things he made me feel and for the things I said. No, that was wrong I didn't want to say that it wasn't me speaking at all I didn't want this I want to go back and tell him the truth but my legs won't let me. What is this? It's like someone is possessed me to say those words to him. I love him, I still do; and then why did I say that? Is it what my heart tells me? No it doesn't at all. I can't do anything anymore; I am running away again, is this all I can do? Just run? _Run Kahoko! Run and don't stop now…_

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Chapter 6 will take a while because I will be very busy preparing for school and tutors...*rolls eyes* I wish tutors are over...augh!! .

Anyways....there are more...ok? so just stay tuned..^^


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6...finally managed to write this before school starts...chapter 7 may take a week to finish or less, but i will definitely finish this guys! I just came home from school, and very tired . Dedicated to....**

**annalismarie99 **

**oreofudge'DD **

**Pathetic Rainbow **

**and lots more of my readers who left me reviews....this is all dedicated to you guys^^ and hope u guys enjoy. Please R&R! **

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Chapter 6

"_I…I just….d-don't love you anymore…I'm sorry"_ The words that came out of my mouth that crushed him and made his world go black; I am aware of what I. The words I didn't ever want to say words; I didn't even mean. But why? What was going on in my head when I told him that? It was like I was being possessed by something and I couldn't even stop my legs from running at the time I ran down the stairs and the good thing is no one saw me crying and running especially any of my friends; I have no idea what an excuse I would have to come up with to cover my actions. .

"_Yes I know and I will mend that if I can get another chance to amend things"_ I want to give you another chance, but I am just to petrified that if I do your parents will take the blame on me for ever leaving Akiko-san and won't permit me to be with you.

I sighed; I am so confused what do I do now? So this is how it feels when Len gets the feeling of frustration, well it's frustrating all right.

**Normal POV**

Kahoko sat at the bench at the school, sighing every 5 minutes still thinking of a clarification to this mess. "Haayy" she sighed one more time

"My, Kaho-san that's the 10th time you sighed this morning" an angelic voice said and to her surprise it was Akiko-san standing in front of her, she quickly stood up

"A-akiko-san…h-how long have you been standing there?" she asked still with the feeling of revelation seeing her, she didn't have the time to see her or even talk to her after what happened the night at Fuyuumi's villa because she was always with Len, and she was avoiding Len at that moment unto now.

"Mmm, just a few minutes ago" she smiled at her "You seem very depressed, on my observation" she sat on the bench where Kahoko was sitting, while Kahoko herself still remained standing

"Y-you were watching me?" her voice was shaky and she had an uneasy feeling that Akiko knew something about her…something deep.

"Well, you seemed like you were sad about something and I just didn't want to interrupt you all of the sudden that would be rude" she told Kahoko, she just raised an eyebrow "Don't you want to sit Kahoko?" she asked her

"Ahh…yeah I should" she sat down beside her, and placed her hands on her lap bowing her head.

"Lovely morning isn't it?" Akiko said as she adored the blue sky

"Yeah it is" she said in unison and followed Akiko's gaze. But she knew this day wasn't going to be lovely for her.

"I just can't wait for our wedding!" she excitingly said while clapping her hands, delight and happiness was evident in her features that had Kahoko thinking '_When was the last time did I give out that facial expression?'_ "Are you excited as well Kaho-san?" Akiko asked her with eyes gleaming.

"A-ano…well" she didn't know how was she going to answer, she knew if that day would come it would be like Friday of the 13th for her. She had to think fast "Well, let's just say that I am happy for you Akiko-san because you have a very lucky man like Tsukimori-kun to…l-love you" she was choking the word 'love' because she knew that he just likes her but doesn't love her and she found it hard to tell her something which was not true, as well about the 'happy' part. But Akiko was unaware of this and hugged Kahoko tight which made her feel that this was all 'awkward' just forcing herself to like Akiko even though she is sweet and always gentle she wasn't actually found of her unlike Fuyuumi-chan and Amou-san who came to like her just because she gave them bake cookies _pfft…_was all she could think about whenever she reminded herself of that. Akiko broke the embrace and smiled at Kahoko

"I am really glad we became good friends Kahoko, and thank you for all the kindness you have shown me in the past ad up to this moment" _what is she implying?_ Thought Kahoko _kindness? I rarely even talk to you, what kindness? You have got to be kidding me. _"Um…well, y-your welcome Akiko-san" she replied while thinking what kind of 'kindness' she was talking about that thought that she hates her and how could she be kind to a person you hate? I mean come on…was Akiko playing with her?

"And to repay you that kindness Kaho-san I will invite you to my party!" she declared while she grabbed Kahoko's hands; this time she was really confused

"Huh? What party?" she asked her, Akiko giggled

"An engagement party, silly! I know it's late and the wedding is in 2 weeks time but because we both didn't have time to arrange things because of school, so Len's mother planned everything out for us and the party's all set on this Friday evening!" she exclaimed which made Kahoko's ear drums hurt she too excited about the party and the wedding. "And I want you, and all of Len's friends to be there as well! This won't be a party if we didn't have any close companions around right? I mean what is a party if it's just us teens and all adults, how boring that would be!" she said and rolled her eyes, Kahoko gave a nervous laugh.

"Um, hehe…you see" she was about to decline Akiko's offer but regarding that this wasn't a bad idea and this would be the perfect even to finally say goodbye to Len once and for all, she absolutely isn't going to their wedding even if Akiko offers her to be the bride's maid, which may happen since Akiko always thought if Kahoko a 'close' friend and Kahoko thinks the other way around about her. **(a/n: let's just say she hates her ok? Very simple!)** "Um…well" she looked at Akiko-san and saw those cute and sweet face of hers which was so angelic and the way she ponytails her hair was so kawaii! No wonder all the boys were disappointed when she knew she was engaged, and when she stared at her; her eyes were talking to her and giving her a persuasive look and telling her that she should come….just starring at her eyes she couldn't take it anymore and just said "Yes! I will Akiko-san!" she couldn't believe she was defeated by her eyes! _Her eyes? Her eyes!? My gosh why do they have same look in Mio's when she uses her puppy dog eyes_ Kahoko was so frustrated that she couldn't help those eyes of hers, it was like they were hypnotic and Len said she wasn't in love with her if she has those kind of eyes.

"Kyaaa!" she hugged Kahoko tighter this time, and just the same as earlier for her this was just wrong "I am very happy that you said yes! Kaho-san, I will really look forward for you at the party!" she broke their hug and smiled at her warmly, but Kahoko just looked at her like what Len does when he looks at people; an impassive look

"And I am sure that you won't regret it! I am doing this because you are so kind to me" she told her Kahoko gave a baffled look and asked her "K-kindness? Um, I am flattered that you treat me as a close friend Akiko-san but….I just don't get what kindness you are talking about I am showing you I mean…I like you" _Like that would happen_ Kahoko said in her thoughts "but it's not like I'm saying I don't want to be nice to you and all but I am not treating you the way others do like Amou-san does, by making you cookies and such I mean all we do is just talk and well…..say hi" she was all telling a lie; luckily Akiko still was oblivious about this. Akiko gave a laugh and gave a warm smile to Kahoko, which made her more uncomfortable _please stop smiling! _She was begging in her mind

"Oh Kahoko, you have no idea do you?" Akiko looked at her intently

"Idea? Huh? Now what are you talking about Akiko?" she asked her

"I know you don't treat me…greatly as others but you did something that no one else on earth would dare do" she told her, her eyes fixed on Kahoko's face

"And what might that be?" Kahoko asked out of curiosity.

This time she was acting all different, she knew something but wouldn't tell anybody about it; she gave a devilish smile moved closer to her and whispered something in her ear "You didn't dare to steal anything precious to me" she said

_Steal? Precious? What, I don't get it was she just being played for just because she was rich and others stole her money, or other things expensive, what is she telling me? _

"If you were them, they would just get that without permission and never give it back to me" Kahoko eyes widened about what she just told her

"O-of course not Akiko-san! I-I would never do such a thing at all!" she defended herself for telling her she wasn't that type of person to do a thing at all; she never stole anything her _entire_ life. Akiko gave a smirk

"You see, unlike them they would just get my precious….let's say something important like a jewel and never, as in never ever give it back because they claim that they rightfully own it and you know how much it would hurt you if something precious was separated from you just like your violin wouldn't you feel miserable if you woke up and knew that it was gone, aren't I right Kahoko?" she whispered in her ear

"Um, yes it would sadden me a lot if I lost my violin or even can't play it anymore…." She meekly replied

"Exactly how I would feel, when others would do that to me….but you know that you wouldn't do that right?"

"Of course not! I'm not like that!" she said. Hearing Akiko giving a 'short laugh making a 'hn' sound and looked at Kahoko with a devilish look, which sent shivers down her spine.

"Good" she said tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear "And remember if you stole anything precious from me Kahoko, you do not know how miserable I will be, and whenever I feel miserable I will make sure that the person that made me feels that way will feel the same way as well" she was becoming a different Akiko Sakomoto by just saying those to her. Kahoko was shaken when she heard her say that.

She smiled at her, this time the usual smile she would give her; sweet and tender and stood up to leave.

"See you at the party Kaho-san and remember what I said ok?" Kahoko nodded and she walked away waving back at her. When she was gone Kahoko was dumbfound and still couldn't believe that Akiko told her those things _"You didn't dare to steal anything precious to me" _it was still ringing in her mind. _Steal anything precious from her? And what that 'anything precious' could that be? Jewel? I don't even fancy those things. Money? No, I do not steal money of course! What could it be? _

"_You see, unlike them they would just get my precious….let's say something important like a jewel or money and never, as in never ever give it back because they claim that they are rightfully the owner" _what was she telling her? Rightfully the owner, she didn't have anything Akiko-san possess what was she trying to say to her? Something's wrong, Akiko is acting different she isn't the sweet and angelic Akiko Sakomoto every one once knew; she changed and Kahoko realized that right away when she started talking to her like that. She was acting like Yunoki-sama. She had a good side and bad side. Just the way she looked at her a while ago with a devilish smile; she would never do that to Len or to others. And yet do it to her? If she would just know what she was telling her then she would fully understand what Akiko-san really wants from a girl like her, she isn't rich; she doesn't have any fancy jewelry, she doesn't even play that well in violin if she needed lessons she would have just asked Len to assist her since she will be his wife in 2 weeks. _Something's wrong, I know that she knows something about me….something very deep. _It was like everything happened so fast just then **(a/n: sorry, if the conversation came all too fast, it's because it's school tomorrow and I will seldom use the computer by then but no worries I will continue this and will finish it^^) **

**Kahoko's Pov **

"RIIIIIIINNNNNGGG" it was the school bell, I carried her things and made her way through the halls until she reached her classroom; once I went it our Sensei went in as well, everybody took their seat as well as me and my friends and their sensei was such in a rush that he skipped greeting them and just jumped unto the lesson _Sensei sure is in a rush today, maybe he has a date tonight he has to prepare_ _for_ I thought teasingly in her head, as their sensei tried to discuss about mathematical terms and equations the lesson lost on me and I didn't even bother to listen, I placed my hand under my chin playing with my pencil and scribbling notes in the notebook, just lazily looking at the doodle drawing of a boy holding hands with a girl and hearts all around them, I was in shock when I figured out that I drew that and marked it with a cross and ripped it from the notebook.

I am doing it again; _he_ is all I could think about, _how could you possibly of him when you told him you don't love him anymore? _I looked out the window and gazed at the sky while birds playfully fly in the sky, I let out and dreamt that I could be that free, free to just spread my wings and would worry about nothing except falling on the ground, what the feeling it would be to feel the wind bumping at your face and just shedding of all your worries and pain while the wind blows them away, why can't that be easy? Easy to just the scar in my heart heal by just shaking it off? Do I have to cross the bridge just to find out that the path I had taken was wrong? But I know that this is all wrong, from the very beginning I was making the biggest mistake in my life; she didn't own him I loved him first I should rightfully have Len! My body became numb and as if I was struck like lightning when I said to myself that I rightfully own Len

"_You see, unlike them they would just get my precious….let's say something important like a jewel or money and never, as in never ever give it back because they claim that they are rightfully the owner"_ Could it be? That she was talking about Len? Did she saw us at the balcony or if ever…at the rooftop? Did she know about that Len didn't love her and found out that he loves me? No…impossible

"_And remember if you stole anything precious from me Kahoko, you do not know how miserable I will be, and whenever I feel miserable I will make sure that the person that made me feels that way will feel the same way as well"_She is threatening me that if I took Len away from her something bad would happen to me as well; Akiko? Could it be? I pictured her face in her mind. That face, that smile and those eyes? Is all just a fake like Yunoki-senpai's? Was she playing with Len, did she really love him? I'm sure she loves him, she threatened me to stay away from him. It was a warning. A deadly warning, Akiko Sakamoto isn't the sweet angel everyone thought she was….she was the devil.

**I will just settle the party in Chapter 7, I didn't want them to wait as well as you so I made Chapter 6 like this…sorry if it is short and has a ton of errors Chapter 7 will take time for sure! Anyways, I hope you like it….**

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_Finally...done..stayed tuned for ch7...please reviews^^ god bless u all! _


	7. Author's Note

**ATTENTION TO ALL MY READERS! **

**Note: Chapter 7 will take me a week or 2 to finish post because I will be very busy with classes which have already started! Ugh! I really hate getting up in the morning, I don not have time in the afternoon because I will consume my time writing scripts for our school play which we will present next week and the teacher chose me to direct it! (Finally a chance to boss people around! Haha…) and after the play we will be having some test, bummer for 2nd week of school and we get a test? How lame is that? But it's just some IQ test and let's just see how I do and wait for the results. Wish me luck though! So I hope you all understand why it will take such a long time for me to update it…but I still hope you all continue to read and enjoy my story…Thanks to all the readers that left me reviews! God bless you all! Please continue reading and forgive me for the long wait! Bye now…time to study^^**

**With Love, **

**Moonshine-79 a.k.a Nicole-san^^ **


	8. Chapter 7

**Here is chapter 7 everybody, so sorry it took me so long...school is so hectic and homework is really killing me! I hate it! But the good news is that I passed all of my test! Yehey! And it makes me very happy...so does your reviews and I expect for you to like this chapter people...the longest I have written so far. Yehey to me! *claps my hands* Arigatou to annalisemarie99 as always and to all my loving readers! God bless you all^^ **

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Chapter 7

Akiko Sakamoto; when you hear her name the words that you are likely to use to describe her is: Kind, sweet, hospitable, talented, smart, elegant, neat….almost all of the good impressions you could possibly think of to describe this woman! Everyone thought she was an angel and so sympathetic. Well she's not! She is the freakin' devil! She dared to threaten me with a caution to stay away from Len because she somehow knows I love him. "Sigh" The only question that replays in my mind is _how? How did she even know about it? How did she know that I love Len?_If she saw us the night at the balcony kissing she would have pulled me away and slapped me by any chances, but she didn't, no one did. Amou-san even reported to me that when she went to check on me that night she was still soundly asleep in her bed…so she couldn't have saw us back then. At the rooftop, perhaps? But all I know is that all the music students were in class at the hour, and so it still puzzles me. Len should be in class as well, not practicing his violin during class hours; he is taking the whole 'perfection' thing way to out of hand.

"_And remember if you stole anything precious from me Kahoko, you do not know how miserable I will be, and whenever I feel miserable I will make sure that the person that made me feels that way will feel the same way as well" _Ugh. It still rings in my head the very moment she knows that even though I try my best to hold back from Len, she also too knows that I could steal him away from her anytime. But she doesn't rightfully claim Len….not yet, that is. Who is she to rule over him? She was just a violinist like him who has dreams and wishes to just be free and to play…. All I am worried about now, if she already had figured out that Len doesn't even fancy her in a way he does me. He could be so absent minded sometimes and isn't conscious on what he is saying, the reason to how I got closer to him; and how I fell in love with the boy even though he wasn't always gentle with me, the reason on how I got to know who he really is and what he entirely wants and also why I knew for an instant he was always so cold and harsh to others and didn't show much kindness…or maybe_ love?_

The only world he grew up in was in the world of music; he lacked care and love from his parents he never felt how is it to be loved by your parents, knowing them being famous and renowned people so they rarely even have time for him. And since he is an only child and no siblings to play with, he was often lonely. I always pitied him whenever I think about his childhood; he wasn't always as 'cold' as everyone thinks he is. He grew up in the world of music and all he ever wanted from the beginning was 'perfection'; perfection of music….the very day his fingers played that instrument was the same day that it had become his goal and ambition. They were 6,000 miles away from him performing in concerts or are in the presence of some business meetings and such; they were very hectic and even didn't give time spend time with him. He never felt how it is to live a 'normal' childhood like the others and I dearly pity him for that. Maybe that's the reason why he always acts like that to many. He was alone and the only people he would spend time with was his maids and his mentor, who taught him the violin instead of his dad, knowing that a child's first teacher should be his or her father but…for him, all they were was just: two great musicians instead of parents. The only best friend he had, the very companion he could talk to and the only 'thing' he would embrace and cry on whenever kids would bully him at school and let out the fear and the pain; the very 'thing' he could ever be with day and night was his violin.

We are riding in a car that is driving us to the Tsukimori's mansion, no not his house but his parents'. Akiko-san sent it for us the boys and the girl rode in separate cars and we, the girls are just spending time talking and thinking how the party would turn out and maybe how the witch, . Akiko-san would look like for her special party. I could here Mio talking about famous people attending at the occasion and meeting some famous composers or musicians while Amou-san can't wait on meeting some cute foreign boys to meet at the certain event, very typical of her to think so. Nao and Fuyuumi-chan would just nod and pretend to agree with every word they were saying to them.

Me? I wasn't even in the mood for talking or thinking, all I did was just stare out the window and watch the sun set and it was going to be nightfall soon. I could see my reflection on the window as it blended with the colors from outside; this wasn't going to be a good weekend for me, I know it. Remembering the very words she said to me a few days ago that she warned me about keeping my distance away from Len because somehow which I am still confused and trying to figure out how the hell did she knew about the fact that I love him, and just hoping she hasn't figured out what Len really feels towards her.

She is creepy and she had two personalities behind that innocent face of hers that no one knows except me, and to think Yunoki-senpai is the only person I know that would give an outlook like that, very surprising that Len's parents considers her the amazing and sympathetic. The Akiko Sakamoto that everyone watches on television or when she performs in various concerts. They are so wrong, all though it does come in mind she can portray herself as an actress; the way she could fool people by just giving such a blameless look on her face and acting that she could be so benevolent to others or…. maybe not so?. Maybe she is just doing that because she was just protecting Len from me, but what is there to protect? Is bad that you love someone else's fiancé? I didn't want to be a part of this mess or neither does Akiko-san, knowing that she didn't want to act that way towards me; she just did that for the sake for the love she has for Len and she believes that Len does so but I am impressed on how he could just act out his love for her; he should be an actor instead of a musician just seeing him thinking of this as a play and waiting for the cut, he could even make millions in the acting career instead of the music industry you know; think of them as Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt just acting out what they want; for the sake of their family or for the sake of the heart.

I just wish this to be a bad dream and just wake up and forget this nonsense! My mind will explode and just wish that I was never apart from this mess; wish that I never fell in love with Len…and wish to just let him chose the life that would be best for him and to make him happy. But is this all I can do: to just wish? Wishes were made to come true, but why isn't my wish being fulfilled? I asked guidance and help from my father who I know can hear my thoughts loud and clear but all he does is just sits there upon a cloud and leave everything to me; doesn't he know that his daughter is in pain and confused? Doesn't he know that a daughter misses his father and just prays to give her one 'father-daughter' moment again and ask for some advice that I know could change my life? What is fate telling me to do? To give it all up and consider my war with Akiko-san is over and I have raised the white flag or to just do what your inner voice tells you to do? Life wasn't being fair with me, I have already suffered enough and have experienced deep anguish inside my chest what more does it want? Does it really want me to suffer? Was I really meant for the pain? Is this what God wants me to feel? He has a reason for everything, but why Len has to take a foolish decision, why I had to fall in love with him, why I had to cry, why I have to be hurt, why I have to be here now wearing a dress and riding in a car with my friends and just waiting for one more week to pass before I could be really free from everything Len wants with me, because he will be with Akiko-san by then. And why would have to do is just stand there, holding unto my clutch bag dressed in a white fancy dress; holding hand in hand in front of he priest as he holds onto the bible the 3 of them stand before the altar and make a life long commitment to one another, and why….why do I have to just watch? Or why would I just refuse to do so and wait for the nightmare to end.

"Are you alright K-Kaho-senpai?" I was back on earth when I heard Fuyuumi-chan's worried voice.

I faced her and smiled "I am fine Fuyuumi-chan, don't worry about me."

"Alright, if you say so Kaho-senpai then I-I will believe you." She told me and I nodded at her and faced the 3 who were looking at us; I didn't give a smile, I just looked at them for a few seconds and set my gaze out the window again and thinking deep thoughts within me.

The car stopped in front of a black gate and the place was filled with lights and full of plants that have been used in the decoration. They overdid it but the place was still extravagant and I am sure that my other friends couldn't have agreed more with me that the fountain was a brilliant touch. Another car parked behind ours and we stepped out of the vehicle one by one; as I stepped foot the wind blew behind my back and gave me shivers on my shoulders I wasn't comfortable with my dress but I liked it, although it was too revealing for me: A backless black dress that reached up to my knees and had ruffles and at the end of every ruffle there was white lining at the end which paired with white strapped 2 inch heels**(a/n: sorry guys I am not the good in elaborating clothes or match making with shoes either)**my mother picked this because she said it would be very becoming of me and I can't disagree with that though, I do find myself beautiful wearing this, with my hair laid down that reached my shoulders. I am not wearing any jewelry because as I have said I do not fancy them even if I am a girl. I fixed my dress and my hair to look good to the guest because I know they are all fancy and rich and I am sure I am the only peasant girl at the party. I saw the boys getting out of the car wearing white and black tuxes I can't deny to myself that they look really handsome in their outfits and fits them very well. When Tsuchiura-kun stepped out from the car he quickly looked at me and gave me a smile which made my cheeks burn.

"You look very beautiful tonight, Hino." he commented on me.

I flushed. "A-arigatou Tsuchiura-kun, y-you look…uh, dashing as well" I was lost of words when he told me that I was beautiful.

"Shall we?" he stretched his arm in front of me and offered his hand; I smiled and placed my hand on his and placed my hands on his arm and walked in the mansion together.

Once the doors had opened we were so astounded on how the place looked. It was like it was a grand ball and to myself thinking if this was the right party this was just….too much to be an engagement party. I mean look at the crystal chandeliers, the hundreds of guest and the expensive table cloth on each and every guest table, the stage banquet that I am sure imported from Germany, Turkey, Main, France, America etc. and even chefs preparing the food for the guest at their table. That is service. And the music, performers playing the violin and the cello most likely a quintet and their music fills the whole place with liveliness and makes everyone alive. Faces I didn't even know but they all look so happy and very excited for the event, but I felt the butterflies rumbling in my stomach and wasn't excited as everyone in this room is.

"You want to get a drink first?" Tsuchiura-kun asked me. I nodded and we walked towards the punch bowl. The others followed us.

"This place really is…words can't even describe how this place looks." Hirara-senpai said, still turning his head looking around the place.

"Boy, is Len really this wealthy?" I heard Mio say out loud.

"Well what would you expect from the great Misa Hamai? She is famous all over Japan and in other countries as well so it's really not that surprising to have a house like this." I explained her, she couldn't answer me because she knew that I was right. They were rich because they always performed in concerts and traveled across the globe, how much money do you think they make? Thousands? Millions? So I am sure that preparing an engagement party for their only son should really be this…. great.

"Look girls, some foreign cuties at 3 o clock." Amou-san told us, Mio Nao, Fuyuumi-chan and I followed her look and led our eyes to 5 really, really handsome American boys all wearing black tuxes with corsages. They all had blue eyes and 2 blonde dudes, one brown haired and the other 2 black haired and they really had fair complexion and almost they looked perfect and nothing wrong with their physical features. So perfect and can't believe that I am drooling some guys I never even met; I snapped myself out of the thought and took a glance at my other friends they were all still starring at them and can't really help their cuteness factor, even Fuyuumi-chan

"Oi! Snap out of it guys!" I was shaking them from their sudden trance

"Kyaaa! This is perfect Kaho-san!" she held both of my hands "First you attend Tsukimori's- kun engagement party and decide to move on with him which we all know you will succeed." Amou-san was saying, I didn't like where this was all going.

"And then we arrive here looking all hot and attractive and at the exact same time in the party we spot some all cute American boys who look really irresistible and since they are a group of 5 and we are 5 as well; we don't all have to share and we could all have each one hot foreign guy! And this way you could move on easier with Tsukimori-kun!" she said while clapping to herself about her plan, I was just sweatdropped on how insanely obsessed she could be with boys and trying to get me involved and make the whole 'moving on with Len' an excuse for that.

"Eh, Amou-san….I…I am not really interested in boys right now." I tried explaining to her

"Oh come on Kaho-san! You have to spend your time entertaining yourself to forget that fool! (Len) and the best way to do that if you find a new boy to hang out with!" but she was firm with me.

"I like the idea Amou-san but…" I started

"But?" she raised an eyebrow.

"I really don't think this is the best time for me to…interact with boys and I cannot deny that they are really cute because they are really, really are." I finally admitted to her. "I know you want me to forget about Tsukimori-kun but it's not that easy, but if you want all of you could have fun and…just, catch yourselves some American boys."

She looked at me, took a deep breathe and released the grip on my hands

"Don't tell me you are turning down those hot guys just for Len! When will you realize that he is no good for you Kaho-san?! If he really loved you he should have left Akiko-san already and we won't even be here in the first place! So live a new life and forget the guy already!" she imposes me to do so.

I didn't give any answer I was just quiet and bowed my head; I didn't know what to say.

I heard her sigh again "You're doing this because you still love him huh? Am I right Kaho-san?" she asked me.

"You know me Amou-san" I smiled "but…not too well."

"Well, there are some things that you can't hide from us Kaho-san and I will be the first among them to find that what that is." she said.

I smiled "And I trust you guys for that." I gave her a hug.

"Well, well, well so glad to see all of you here." A voice said and to our expectations we thought it would be Akiko-san but it was Ms. Hamai; the great pianist or also known as Len's mother

"Pleasure to be here Ms. Hamai." Yunoki-senpai said as all of us bowed

"I am glad you came Hino-san." she looked at me and gave me a sudden hug.

"I am very glad as well Ms. Hamai." I said to her

"You all look lovely today ladies and to have you informed that there are some young, single foreign boys here whom are interested in young ladies like you." Misa was teasing us; Mio just squealed, I gave a nervous laugh. She doesn't know about me and Len yet but I know she'll figure out sooner or later; she could read Len and I like an open book.

"And as for you boys," she looked at them "I could sense that you guys will be the center of the attention of the party tonight."

"Huh? What are you saying Ms. Hamai?" Hirara-senpai asked her.

She giggled "Just take a look around and you'll find out" and so they did. They didn't notice that all of the girls were already having heart shaped eyes starring at them and especially Yunoki-senpai, all of us were sweatdrop and knew that this could be a crazy night not just for us but also for the boys. Some of the girls tried getting Hirara-senpai attention by waving at him and giving him a flying kiss; he on the other hand just looked away and giving us a red tomato face. We laughed.

"Well Hirara looks like you have a date tonight." Yunoki-senpai mocked him

"Ha-ha, not funny." he snapped at him and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"Len and Akiko will come join you guys a little later I just hope you all enjoy the party for the meantime you should all stay at the garden that's where the real party is." she told us

"We will, Ms. Hamai" I said to her, she smiled and walked away us leaving the 7 of us behind.

"Let's head to the garden" I heard Tsuchiura-kun said, we all nodded and walked across the room and headed for the garden.

Once we were there, what came upon us were 50+ tables and a hundred chairs, every table has a lovely set of flowers or a bouquet that was arranged nicely and the colors are very pleasing to the eyes. There was a stage and a lake? Was it a lake? I mean the garden was huge but I didn't think bog enough to actually have a lake, maybe it's a lake house or lake mansion; balloons, streamers, all these people, the expensive food and talk about the music they even have class performers performing and playing the cello and the violin and gives soothing music and at least something to ease up my mind.**(a/n:I am not in the mood to give more details on how the party looks like you could just think that up in your head ok? Let's just skip that and head onto the conversations, shall we?)**

"Our tables over here." Shimizu-kun said while pointing at a certain table that had a sign that said 'Reserved for the Concours Participants.'

"That's our table all right." Tsuchiura-kun said and took a seat, so did we I wasn't comfortable wearing high heels and I know I'll just get blisters for this.

"My feet are killing me." I mumbled.

"You really shouldn't wear heels you know, you know very well what happens when you wear them." Nao told me. Here we go again, she is acting like a mother hen again.

"Well what should I wear then? My school shoes? People will laugh at me." I argued with her.

"At least some doll shoes are already fine but you have to go with the heels."

I crossed my arms. "It's my feet and my body so I decide what I want to wear ok?" I retorted back.

"Fine. Fine" she waved her hand "But don't go to me asking me to buy bandages for you because your feet hurts" she notified me.

"Fine!" I replied to her all annoyed; it was my choice and it me wearing the shoes not her! Sheesh; what is happening to her? How does she spend her free time at home, doing motherly activities? Give me a break.

We all sat at the table and was quiet, for the first time Hirara-senpai was quiet and us thinking that he would compliment 'This place is huge' or 'Is this really a mansion? More like a castle to me' what happened to that Hirara Kazuki? Maybe his being quiet because he knows that girls are watching him and he is doing his best to not get embarrassed and playing cool.

"I wonder where Tsukimori-kun and Akiko-san is." Fuyuumi-chan said

"Maybe their still preparing and getting all dressed up." Shimizu-kun replied to her, she just nodded and considered his thought.

"Ahh! Fuyuumi-chan, Kaho-san and all of you guys came!" a voice full of glee said, we all turned around and saw that it was Akiko-san; hand in hand with Len. We all stood up.

"Akiko-san you look just adorable!" Mio told her and smiled

"Well I am glad you think so." she said and all gave us a hug. Len just stood there and just greeted us and didn't even give a smile he just looked at us. I knew that he was looking at me and he concentrated his gaze on me. After that incident on the rooftop he probably is angry with me because I gave up on him easily. I tried looking at him and observed how he looked tonight; he was wearing a black suit and I expected a tux but he still looked outstanding in whatever he wears a blue tie and the usual hairstyle he has even though he didn't wear tuxes like the other boys here for me I think he still outstand the others and looks very handsome; my heart was racing and beating so fast seeing him like that. I can't believe I fell in love with a person who is so gorgeous. How could I ever deny that? He is irresistible and I still love him.

Our eyes locked on one another's and he was studying the dress I was wearing and how I looked wearing it. I felt nervous because maybe I wasn't as beautiful as Akiko-san or the other girls here who I know their dresses are pretty expensive. I had an uneasy feeling in me when he still was looking at me and the dress

"Hino." it caught my attention and looked at him, we never really said our first names whenever people are around especially our friends

"Y-yes Tsukimori-kun?"

He smiled at me "You look very beautiful tonight and I am glad you came." I blushed and my heart was jumping and I thought it would escape out of my chest, isn't he still mad at me? After what I told him? Does he still love me? If Akiko saw us, who cares listen all she wants to with the two of us and let her know the naked truth behind all of this gibberish.

"Just enjoy the party." he said to me, I couldn't speak my voice was gone and I felt the feeling I was being dominated again over my body. All I did was just nod, he walked passed me and then placed his hand around Akiko's waist and came to greet the other guest I just watched them walk hand in hand and making others think they really are teenagers in love. Foolishness!

**(A/n: I skipped a lot of parts here because it will make the chapter really long so let's just jump to the part of Kahoko and Misa Hamai)**

The party had already started a few hours ago and now I am holding a glass with wine in my hand and trying to act like an adult in the party, I talk to people I don't even know but I didn't really care I was just doing that so I won't look like I am left out and just sit down by myself on a table and drinking wine. Mio and Amou-san are flirting with some Austrian guy they met, Nao and Fuyuumi-chan are having their own agenda leaving me out but I don't mind much though, the boys are being fought over a group of girls from earlier who waved to Hirara-senpai and now having a 'girl fight' to find out who dates Yunoki-senpai because Tsuchiura-kun and Hirara have already been taken; and poor Shimizu-kun just laying his head on the table and peacefully sleeping, he really looks liked an angel when he sleeps he must be really tired from always playing the cello until morning all the time, he really loves music.

_Playgirls,_I thought in mind. I stirred my wine by making my glass move in small circles and watch it play, I looked up the heavens and there I saw the stars shining and winking down at me I crossed my legs and just made myself comfortable in my seat and just scrutinize the clouds that were slowly passing by and covering the moon, as it the moon was already enveloped by the cloud, the moon's light on my face have disappeared as well. I was alone and didn't know what to do, I felt a hand on my shoulder and it was Misa Hamai who took her seat right beside me. I just smiled at her and continued stirring my wine

"What are you doing here sitting by yourself all alone? You should have fun like your friends." she told me.

"I'm really not in the mood right now." I said while placing my glass on the table and watch the flames of the candle dancing in the middle of the table with flowers decorated around it and placed in a candle holder.

"Why not? It's a Friday night and girls like you should have fun and even….fall in love"

"I am just sick of Love" I told her

She was quite surprised on what I said and rested her back on the chair and gave me an amusing look "And why be sick of it? Love is one of the most beautiful things on earth." she clarified to me

"I don't know, it's just…" I paused and thought how I would have to explain to her why I cried my heart out. I can't tell her 'because your son is marrying a bitch and now I have to suffer every time I would have to see them together that's why love sucks.' I could never talk to her like that. "I think it would be better if we didn't talk about it."

"Very well then, if you think hiding it would be the best way to at least ease up that problem of yours, I won't force you" she was about to stand up but I stopped her by holding unto her dress, she smiled at me and took her sit beside me again.

"Let's talk about this, what do you say?" she asked me. I looked away.

"I-it's not that easy." I tried telling her

"Love is never easy Kaho, so just tell me what is bothering you?" her voice was so calm

I turned my head to her "A-alright then." I took a deep breath and got first my glass and took a sip of wine and placed it back on the table

"What would you do if you love someone and you have to see them leave you and never come back? Will you blame that person because you already told him what you really feel and have the same feelings with you as well, but still leaves you behind or will you just give up and move on?"

She caressed my face and smiled "It's about Len isn't it? Just tell me Kaho." I was surprised on how she could find out so fast; she does read me like an open book because I could be very emotional sometimes and by looking at me you could easily tell what's on my mind. "H-how did you know Ms. Hamai?" I said in a shaky voice.

"Just call me Misa, it sounds much better" she told me

"O-okay….Misa."

She chuckled "You are so open Kaho, I read you like an open book." See what I mean?

"The connection you and Len have is different with the other fiancé candidates in the past, you changed him Kaho and I thank you for that because you did one thing me and his father couldn't." She looked at me with loving eyes and tucked some hair behind my ear.

"You are very beautiful Kaho." she continued and I blushed.

"A-arigatou." I said in a soft voice

"But I believe that Len loves Akiko." my surrounding became black, what? Did she say that Len_loves_Akiko? My eyes widened.

"What?" I wanted her to rephrase what she just said to me

"Len loves Akiko and I know your pain Kaho, I like you a lot I really do; I grew to love you just like my daughter and saddens me to see you in pain but I think this is what Len wants and what would make him happy and maybe change his life with Akiko." she didn't know me, she could read me but she couldn't read her own son? She did read me like a book but she skipped some chapters on me and most importantly the book of her son. She was wrong, I wanted to tell her that but seeing how much effort she placed into just to prepare this party for Len and Akiko would just ruin everything and would make her disappointed with me; I didn't want her to be upset of me I am even honored that Misa thinks of me as family and love me as one as well. She knows what I want; but doesn't know what_her_son actually_wants._"I just ask for your understanding Kaho, and just forgive all the pain that Len has caused you but this is for me and for him; this is what_he_wants Kaho, I know that you will find someone more worthy for you who will love you entirely." I don't need someone else, all I need is Len and no one else could change that for me. No one. "I admire your strength Kaho, I like you I really, really do but I think Akiko is more suited with Len."

My strength? She doesn't know all the tears I had to shed the past months and you call that admiring my strength? I was weak; I always am. I gave a weak smile and I wanted to cry.

"I understand Misa." I fought back my tears "I'll be strong."

She hugged me tightly "I know you will be fine and I believe in you Kaho, I always do" she whispered in my ear, lies! Lies! Lies! I will never be ok!

"And to make things better for the meantime I would like to introduce you to someone." She told me

"Huh? And who is that?" I asked her all baffled, she broke our hug and we stood up holding my hand.

"Kaho…I would like you to meet…Kaji, Kaji this is Kahoko Hino" I man walked behind Misa and introduced us together, he was….cute? Should I say so for my first impression of him? He was as tall as Tsuchiura-kun**(a/n: I can't tell what are the other features of Kaji though just imagine what he looks like in the anime in the manga not in the mood for detailing what he looks like or what he wears)**He looked like a real gentleman to me and he looks sympathetic anyway, so no bad vibes with this guy.

"Hello…Hino" he took my hand and kissed my knuckles which made me blushes furiously because I know people are watching us. When I looked around if any one was watching, I saw Len looking at Kaji as he kisses my hand and looks…mad? Or maybe jealous; he looked at me and I quickly escaped his look on me and just paid attention to Kaji who smiled at me and still holding my hand, I couldn't help my feel my cheeks burn uncontrollably.

"A-ano..." I was speechless in front of the guy.

"Well then, I'll just leave you two alone." Misa winked at me and walked away leaving the 2 of us_ No don't go! _As I watch her walking away I gave a nervous laugh to this guy here name Kaji…now I have an uneasy feeling in me

"Well pleasure to meet a beautiful lady like you."

I flushed…again. "T-thank you, a pleasure to meet you as well Kaji" I was totally lost and didn't know what to say to him.

"Now, shall we get some drinks or do you want to just sit here and get to know each other a little more?" he asked me

"I think we should get some drinks." I would prefer that than rather sitting and talking with him where there are less people around, that would be bad.

We walked through the garden and when we reached the banquet we got our selves some punch and there we started our conversation.

"Are you and Tsukimori classmates??" he asked me

"No, we're just school mates. He is a music student I'm General Educations but he is also my mentor he taught me before in the violin." I told him

"He was the one that taught you to play?"

"No he just tutored me…to improve; I learned the violin when…." I stopped and then realize what I was about to say; I couldn't tell him that my violin was given to me by Lili a fairy and was a magic violin but not now. Ever since the strings broke; I learned to play it for real without the help of magic. "A close friend just gave me the violin and I just started learning it all by myself." I said proudly because I really did learn to play the violin by myself "And I wouldn't be good in playing without the assistance of Tsukimori-kun."

"He must be really kind huh?"

I almost blurted out the punch that I was drinking when he said that he must be 'kind' at first he isn't but later on, he could be.

"Kind? Well at first not so but if you get to know him more, you'll find out that his a really good person." I explained to him while I was locking my eyes on him while he was talking with other guest

"Did you love him?" I was shocked and looked at him with wide eyes

"Excuse me?"

"Did you love him? I mean like did you have a relationship…girlfriend, boyfriend thing."

"Of course not! We never had a relationship like that, we are just friends." when I said that I was asking myself why couldn't we be more than normal friends? This is far as we could go; being normal friends.

Suddenly music started playing and people were starting to grab partners and dancing hand in hand on the dance floor. It was time to dance, I felt someone holding my hand and to my surprise it was Kaji.

"Shall we dance?" he asked me with a smile

"S-sure." I said, he led me across the dance floor and place his hands around my waist; my heart was beating fast again as I placed my hand on his shoulders and then our feet start to move along with the music. I was sure that Len and the others were watching us; I could feel their glare at us while we danced along with the others, I tried resting my head on his chest but I was to timid to do so; but he buried his face in my hair and breathed in my scent and whispered in my ear "It's fine, rest your head if you want to I'll be ok with that" I considered that and did so, I placed my head on his head and wanted to feel all relaxed, I wanted it to be ok and know that there is someone out there besides Len that could love me and who I can love…as I rested my head; I didn't feel safe, I didn't feel the warm feeling that I had felt when Len hugged me on the balcony at the villa. The feeling was different, it was wrong. This isn't right.

**Len's POV**

I watched them dancing along the and just feeling the music with their body; I watched_her_how she rested her head onto his chest and closing her eyes it looks like she feels so calm and feeling peace. Just watching she with other boys makes my heart being cut into pieces by a chainsaw, so this is how it feels when you are heartbroken, so inconsolable. The feeling is just too much and all the agony she has felt just to see me with Akiko is far more than what I am feeling now. You are a fool Len! You are letting the girl you love go; you can't even fight the love you have for her! Why are you so weak? I can't be smart and figure out what to do to let her be with you one more time.

"_I…I just….d-don't love you anymore…I'm sorry"_Did she really mean that? Doesn't she love me anymore? The love I have for her in my heart could never be replaced, no one could replace that. No one.

**Kahoko's POV**

After 20 minutes of dancing my feet really ached and I know I already have blisters_damn you shoes!_I cursed them in my mind, I really hate high heels; Nao did have a point and do need band aids but she could just be so bossy and so annoying some times even though if it was for our own good. I was limping my way for a chair.

"Are you alright Hino?" Kaji observed me limping.

"I-I'm fine, I just need to take a seat, that's all." I told him and still limping until I finally rested my butt on the chair.

"You need some water?" he asked me

"No thanks, I'm good." I said

"If you need me I'll just going to check on my fellow colleagues ok?" I nodded at him and he walked away.

I just sat there relaxing my feet and it was really sore from dancing when I couldn't resist the pain anymore I removed my shoes and walked quickly to a place where no one could disturb me and I could just be in peace. I reached a clearing and I saw a bench near the lake…or whatever form of body of water that is which looks like a lake let's just call it that. I walked towards the bench; barefooted and I could feel the grass brushing through my feet which is very ticklish, I couldn't help myself to laugh and giggle. I just wanted to enjoy myself as I walked towards the bench. I sat on the bench and placed my heels on the ground I swung my legs back and forth feeling the grass on my feet; the wind blew and I could hear laughter and music from the party; I am a bit far from where the party is so I am sure no one could find out now where I am; good just some time for myself…to think, and figure things out. I looked up at the sky and the moonlight shining down at my face and stars who are watching over me, tonight is really beautiful.

"It isn't much fun when your alone." I heard a voice; voice of a…boy, it couldn't be I turned around and it was Len, he was here and his blue tie was loose and looked like he was tired from entertaining all the guest each and every one of them; he sat beside me and rested his back on the bench while I was trying to keep my distance from him.

"What are you doing here?" he asked me

"I needed some place quiet that's all." I simply replied to him "What are you doing here?" I returned his question to him.

"It is so noisy and giving me headaches I need a quiet place as well." he told me

"The wedding is in a week, are you excited?" I asked him and looked out the lake.

"Not one bit, but Akiko is." he told me; I hated it when he said her name.

"What do you expect from her? She's happy about everything."

We were silent for a while, and the wind blew which made my hair fly behind me and swaying with the wing, I rubbed my shoulders and I was cold; I should have brought a blazer.

"Do you still love me?" I heard him asking me; I faced him and wanted to cry I was opening my mouth but closing it again because I didn't know what to say.

"Do you still love me Kahoko?" He asked me once again and this time looking at me and locking his eyes with mine

"I…I can't be with you Len." I managed to find the words to say "Even if I love you; I could never be with you"

"Why say so Kahoko?" he asked me

"Because, your mother is very much happy with Akiko-san and I could see the joy in her eyes and I could see she is very proud of you for making this decision and if I show up in the picture then everyone will be very disappointed and upset just because of me. I don't want to cause you any harm Len. I am willing to let you go if this would please you."

"This does not please me Kahoko, not even a bit not even a single decoration does not please me, me being here with you is the only thing that pleased me the entire evening and I know it does so to you Kahoko now answer my question do you still love me?"

I wanted to avoid the question but I know that I still have to answer him; I looked away and lifted my head up in the sky I wanted to keep silent and not say a word

"If you won't answer me, I would have to deal with that." I heard him say in defeat, I observed the stars that were glimmering down at the both of us and the moon shining down

"If a shooting star passed by one more time what would you wish for?" I asked him.

"Wish that I never have agreed on marrying Akiko in the first place." he answered me "What would you wish for?" he returned it to me.

I gave out a sigh first before I could give my answer "I wish there were no goodbyes, that way I wouldn't have to see people I love leave me." I faced him "Are you afraid of goodbyes Len?" I asked him

"No" he said "But if it means saying goodbye to you, I fear of goodbyes." he didn't look at me; he kept his gaze on the sky and the heavens.

"Why is that?" I asked once more

"The hardest thing in saying goodbye is not the fact that I'm going to miss you; but it's knowing you might not say 'hello' ever again" His words struck me, I never thought of it that way that once you say goodbye you may never see that person ever again. Just in the manner with my father, the last goodbye I said to him was at his funeral when I was just 6 years old and he died in a car accident I saw my mother in grief and seeing the pain in her eyes when his casket was being lowered down into the grave; I knew that once he would be buried up I could never hear him say 'hello' to me ever again and this is what Len fears of goodbyes? Knowing we may never see each other again? I gave a laugh.

"I won't die Len, we still a lot of time for us to meet again." I said jokingly

"But we don't know how much time there is left for the both of us." he told me "I only have a week left to be with you Kahoko."

"Are you ready for this Len?" I asked him; he faced him

"Ready for?" ha gave a puzzled look

"Ready to have a life long commitment with someone you don't even love, ready to say goodbye to me for good."

He looked at my eyes deeply and he reached out for my face touching my cheek and brushing along my long red hair, he pulled me closer to him and crashed his lips into mine. The feeling was warm and I felt entirely safe with him, he is the only one that could make me feel this way and no one else. He meant everything to me now but I know he'll belong to someone else just after a week; tears traveled along my pale cheek while he kisses me. He stops and looks at me; wipes my tears with his thumb

"Why are you even crying?" he asked me while giving me a playful smile

"Because this is the only moment we could even spend with one another."

"Is that so, then let's not let it go to waste." he was about to embrace me but I pushed him away.

"I think it's best if I head back to the party now" I told him he was still holding unto my arm

"But I thought you want to spend your time here with me"

"Things will just make things harder for me to forget you if we continue this Len, you are suppose to be with Akiko and not with me! So please Len I just want this affair between us to stop"

"Akiko? I told you I don't love Akiko! I love you Kahoko you and only you! No one can ever take your place" he was being aggressive on his hold on arm and it was hurting me

" Please Len, don't you see that this is the only time we could ever spare for one another? And sooner or later I could never have you or even let you others know how much you mean so much to me; no one could understand that but what is the use? You'll just leave me in the end and knowing you would never come back."

"Wait for me and I promise, I will come back for you Kahoko. Just wait for me."

"I have waited for you for months and making that years? Who knows how many pieces my heart has been broken into and adding more pain would even let me die in distress. That could happen to me Len; it could happen to anyone."

He released his grasp on me "Are you saying goodbye Kahoko?" he asked me

"If it could be for the best Len I have to because this way we could both move on and I know you fear this but you have to face your fear sooner or later." I explained to him

"But don't say goodbye to me now Kahoko, not now." he pleaded to me I stood up and took my shoes in my hands.

"Will you run away again? For the 3rd time? Is that all you could do Kahoko? Just run?" he demanded me, my back faced him revealing my skin.

I sighed "No Len." I replied softly This time this is…Goodbye, because I know even though how long we spend our time here we both know that you would end up with Akiko in the end so what's the use of it anyway? Nothing, so it's best if we both just forget everything and…move on" I moved my feet and slowly walking away leaving him alone….again, tears are coming out from my eyes again I am a coward and I am weak; I always am weak and I cannot find the strength to fight back the love I still have for him, I can't be strong, I can not manage get out the strength within me. What happened to the Kahoko that never gives up until she succeeds, until she gets what she wants? What happened to me? I girl just came along to school and I have changed, my whole life has changed. Saying Goodbye is never easy, just like what Len said having the fear of him never saying 'hello' to me again.

I wiped my tears with my hands and just swayed the shoes that were in my hands and I walked along the grass the wind hitting my face. Then a girl was looking at me; wearing her dark pink dress and her hair in a bun she smiles at me and approaches me.

"Enjoying Kahoko?" Akiko asked me acting all nice.

"Yeah, the party is great!" I tried giving a happy tone and not her noticing that I cried and me acting all nice to her

"Well I am glad you think so, isn't it—"she looked ay my feet "What are you doing not wearing your shoes! Your feet will get dirty!"

"It's fine, I like the feeling my feet on the grass and besides I am not comfortable wearing heels." I said

"Too bad those shoes looks great on you though or maybe your just not used to wearing them because you know you can't afford shoes like that when you live such a, how do I put this…a low-life?" she smiled mockingly at me; I was sick of that curve on her face what a fake!

"So what if I live a low-life and not as rich and beautiful as you; At least people don't suspect me as a fake?"

She was quite bomb shelled when I said that "Me a fake? I am not a fake Kahoko, I am the real deal."

"Then why show your dark side now?"

"I am just doing this so that you have to be aware to stay away from my Len for his sake, Kahoko."

"Your Len? You don't own Len."

"Not yet….in a week he'll be all mine"

"How did you even find out?" I managed to ask her the question that was taunting my mind for the past few days. She began pacing back and forth in front of me with her finger still under her chin

"It wasn't so complicated you know; in fact it was so palpable on just seeing the look in your eye when you see us together, the way we walk, talk, held hands. Jealousy was written through those amber eyes of your Kahoko Hino, and when I caught you starring at Len it was as if….he was the only person you could see and no one else. I am watching your every move you know that?" she paused and looked at me with those devil of the eyes. Speak of the devil.

"The wedding will be in a week, coming?" she asked me

"No." I gave a stiff reply

"Really? And why is that? I am sure Len would love to see you for the…last time." she sneered

"I just don't want to, considering that you're wedding would just be like a funeral to me and besides I would just waste my time watching hell."

"How harsh of you to say so Kahoko, don't you want to say your goodbyes to Len one last time?" she came closer

"I already did" I replied to her; she raised an eyebrow.

"You already did? Looks like it would be a waste of time after all, and when did you bid your last Kahoko?" she questioned me

"A few minutes ago"

"Did he stop you?"

"No"

"Then the looks of it he was setting you free, am I correct?"

"I wouldn't really say setting me free though; let's just say one way of him to move on and for me as well, because if you truly love someone you have to learn to let them go." I explained calmly

"And you're saying Len loves you?"

"Yes, with all his heart."

She gave a maddening laugh "Well, well, well just what I had thought so…Len loves you" she orbited around me and I felt her presence behind me and moving closer.

"He doesn't love you." I tried telling her.

"Is that so?" she whispered in my ear.

"Hey Kahoko! It's time to leave already! Better hurry!" Hirara-senpai called me and it was time to leave.

"Coming!" I shouted back at him and my attention at Akiko

"Well looks like you have to leave, what a shame!" She was mocking me.

"Don't pretend that you all enjoyed us being here in fact I think you even despise us being here" I told her

"Your right, I do, especially your annoying friends."

"Don't you dare talk that way to my friends!" I shouted.

"Touché, touché. You should get going I still have business with my…future husband." she said near my ears

"He doesn't love you." I repeated once more

"Then I'll just have to seduce him into loving me; that way we could get things…warmed up." she gave an evil laugh I felt her hands on my cold shoulders "If you ever interfere with our wedding; prepare to face the consequences Kahoko, because this is not a game this is reality and with every word I said to you that day at the garden was not a fake." She tightly clenched her hands on my shoulders.

"Even though what I told Len was a lie that I couldn't wait for him any longer because it would add up all the pain; I am willing to wait for him even until the very last day I die; just to get you out of his life I will do that because the goodbye I said to him was nothing but a mere lie."

"Be careful with your actions Kahoko; remember what I told you."

"So what? Kill me if yo—"

"Hey Kahoko! You coming or what?" Hirara-senpai called out one more time

"Time to leave princess, looks like my happy ever after will come true after all." she released her grip and backed a few steps away

"Len will never be happy with you." "We'll just see about that." I heard her gave a laugh and just walked away. I ran to Hirara-senpai and the others still barefooted. She was worse than Azuma, she has a split personality which is not good, and it was never good!

"What took you so long Kaho-san?" Mio asked me.

"Gomen to keep every one waiting! I just bid my goodbye to Akiko-san." I lied I didn't want to mention the conversation we had earlier; I could never reveal it to them.

"Well then let's get going!" Tsuchiura-kun said and we all followed him outside the mansion.

When we were outside the mansion and car was in front of us I turned around and took a good look at the mansion again, still lights made the place look bright but for me it already surrounds darkness around the place. Misa was standing outside the gate and saying her goodbyes "It was fun having all of you here" we all bowed to her and she bowed to us. "We hope you come and visit after the wedding"

"Sure we will! We will still see Len after all!" Hirara-senpai exclaimed, she smiled and we bid farewell. We went in the car and took our sits, my feet still hurts I was massaging it.

"The party was great huh?" Amou-san said.

"Yeah it was" Fuyuumi-chan agreed with her.

"Did you enjoy Kaho-san?" Mio asked me, I just gave a nod and thought deep.

The words she told; the way she looked at me and the way she smiled at me that was a different Akiko-Sakamoto I just encountered back there. Who was she? Who is the real Akiko? Her words struck me and I pondered every word that came out from her mouth._"I am watching your every move you know that?"_She was watching me and she found out; just by looking at my eyes and how my facial expression was whenever I looked at them; I wasn't aware of it and I never knew I am just so absent minded.

"_If a shooting star passed by one more time what would you wish for?"_the question I asked him earlier. Wishing upon a star just like in fairytales won't solve anything, it's just fantasy and never real how could I still believe in such things?_"Time to leave princess, looks like my happy ever after will come true."_For a person her age she still believes in happy ever after? It just makes me laugh.

"_The hardest thing in saying goodbye is not the fact that I'm going to miss you; but its knowing you might not say 'hello' ever again"_

One thing the Len fears the most asides from unable to play the violin….is the word 'goodbye.'

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**Thank God done! Just like chapter 7, chapter 8 will take a while as well....although much longer....I hope you are all willing to wait. **

**I just have one question: Does anyone know the link for Secondo Passo ep2??? it already aired in Japan last June 5 and if anyone knows could you please kindly PM me! Please inform me about this....**

**I have to leave now because my desk is filled with homework!! Wish me luck...again...hehe bye and please REVIEW! do not leave without reviewing ok? (haha...to demanding) thanks again! **


	9. Chapter 8

**Hello Minna-san!! Chapter 8 finally here...yehey! A million thanks to annalisemari99 as always and also to my lovely readers! **

**I hope you guys enjoy this chappie^^ nothing more to say....**

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Chapter 8

The sun rose the next morning, the colors of the sky shifting from a dark bluish color to a conflagration of yellow and pink, as an effect of it's rays. The air is fresh, sweet and cold but for a certain red headed girl it wasn't fresh nor was it sweet; it was definitely cold. She rose from bed even before her clock would trigger, she was already immune to it, one of her reasons why was always late these past few days, even weeks but somehow she managed to get up at around 6:30 am, very unlike her. She couldn't sleep, and was praying that daylight would not come, that the sun to not show its morning rays. Her day would start out bad and it would end worse, she cursed this very day. Yes it is a Tuesday, but other than that…it is also her biggest nightmare.

Kahoko Hino, a General Ed student dressed for school, her bag slung over her shoulder, her lunch pack hanging from her hand and dressed in a clean General Ed uniform. She is ready, glancing at the clock one more time before she leaves. _7: 23am_ . Still early for her to be at school but she wanted just wanted the day to be over. Holding onto the door knob, she lets out a sigh for not even saying goodbye to her mother who is still asleep and her sister is off to work; she thinks it is best if she didn't disturb her slumber. Turning the knob she stepped out of the house and closed the door behind her, clenching her soft and thin hands and glaring up at the sky, it didn't seem to return her glare so she departed from home. Walking along the busy road, she didn't pay much attention to the surroundings she is busy enough with her own thoughts. Today is Len and Akiko's wedding and also her biggest nightmare. The day she thought would never come, thinking it would just be a fantasy but it became a reality, thinking of having him for the rest for her life but he has to be with someone else; with someone she hates being the so called 'princess' in her own fairytale world but it's the other way around. She is her stepmother locking her up in a room and preventing her from wearing the glass slipper to be with her prince charming and living a happy ever after. Since when did the villains ever prevail in the end? She never heard a story without a happy ever after, maybe this is the first one that kids of ages 3-8 would here that a fairytale that prince married the evil witch instead of _his_ princess. She is the devil in disguise.

**Tsukimori's residence**

A very big day for a certain blue haired violinist and for a raven haired girl for today is their big wedding. People from different countries, even different continents will be present at the wedding just to be a witness of Misa Hamai's only son's wedding. A very special event is what his mother calls it, but for her son nothing was special about today, not without Kahoko by his side anymore. He had to suppress his distaste about thinking that Akiko would be his wife, how much longer could he pretend like this? He sits by his window sill in his bedroom observing the birds flying high above the sky, indicating on how the weather would be for today. It looked like it would be a….cold day, yes very cold in his situation right now but for anyone they could tell that it is a fine day, with Len? Nothing will ever be fine ever again. _Knock, Knock_ Someone is at his door

"Come in!" he called out, enough for the person to hear. He heard his door opening and feeling the presence inside the room turning his head to see who it is; it was his mother.

Showing him 3 tuxedos of the color, black and white and also paired with beautiful corsages, surely made by Japan's best designers and tailors.

"I have a few tuxedos here you may try on for the wedding, why don't you try them on and pick which on you like." You could sense the glee and excitement in her voice when she said 'for the wedding'

"Maybe later, I am not in the mood to play dress up," he said abruptly, her mother surprised with his son's reply

"Dress up? This is not a dress up Len, this is a preparation for your wedding day and you should know better!"

"You should have done that yesterday rather than today," he said curtly.

"You know how busy I can be with concerts and tours; you should understand that by now."

Being silent for a few minutes, he then finally said, "I should get ready for school." He stood straight walking pass his mother and opening his closet

"School? But you are excused for the day, I am sure the principal and you teacher would understand that, it is your wedding day of course." She said while laying down the tuxes on his blue bed. He pulls out a fresh clean uniform from his closet and quickly changes.

"I do not like the feeling of being absent from class, and I don't have a decent place to practice as well." He picks up his violin case from his desk, his back facing his mother.

"Is that all you could think about? Your violin? Akiko will be very disappointed with you when she finds out that your violin is more important than your wedding, you do not know how much effort we gave in to this just to make this day special." There is it again, the word 'special' -- how he hated thinking that it was something so exclusive. "And all of that effort will just go to waste," he murmured while packing his things in his bag, he zips up his bag and is good to go.

"I'll be leaving now." he faces his mother and walks to the door, pushing the door open. He suddenly pauses when her mother said, "And I thought you've changed" hearing her mother's words, struck him. He didn't change; no one could ever change him but Kahoko "I thought having a person you love in your life would change you for the good, but I could still see you are the same you" silence enveloped the room for a short while.

"Some people think the wrong things" he finally said and left the room, and her mother. Sometimes Len didn't see his mother as a real mother, he knew her by being a great pianist and making money by performing in orchestras, in tours etc. Whenever his mother was at home, the only time she had for him was when he would tuck him into bed or when he would accompany him during his contest when he was still a little boy. Never having the experience of a boy spending its mother-son moment, something he longed for as a little boy even until now.

He walks down the grand staircase, he had a bad start for today and matters are going to get worse.

"Good morning Len!" A raven haired girl greeted him as he walked by the living room; he was already irritated enough. Without an expression he greeted her.

"Good morning Akiko."

Akiko seeing Len dressed in his uniform just made her a bit confused. "You're going to school?" he nodded in response. "Today?"

"Should I say tomorrow?" was his grim response, Akiko pouted.

"At least be nice to me on the day of our wedding and how could you possibly even think of school when we have so much to prepare for!" She waved her arms in the air trying to convince him to stay.

"You and mother could deal with that matter; you still have plenty of time."

"And you let me do the work? Come on Len, I am sure that sensei would understand our absence I mean the whole school knows how important this day is to us."

He didn't hesitate or utter a word.

"What now? Give me the silent treatment? This is the most important part of our lives and you still think about going to school?"

"Education is still a priority." He explained.

"Of course it is, but this is _our_ wedding day my biggest dream and I will not let that go to waste Len so you should stay here and help out!"

"I'll be late for school, now if you excuse me—"he was about to approach the door but Akiko blocked his way. "I said excuse me."

"You are not going anywhere, you are going to stay here."

"I told you mother could help you with that stuff, I have to go now" but still blocking his way, she wouldn't give up

"What's the reason for you attend school anyway? You have a perfect excuse." she asked her while crossing her arms

"I feel bored staying here at home and school is the only place I can keep myself busy."

"You rather do school activities besides the activities for our wedding? I mean who in the world would choose school over their own wedding?"

"Please step aside." he gently pushes her away from the door and reaching for the knob

"This isn't about school is it? It's about that Hino girl am I correct?" Akiko asked, his eyes widening on bringing up such a topic. He didn't want to talk about Kahoko anymore especially to Akiko who knows what he could just tell her about Kahoko but she was right; she is the whole reason why he wanted to go to Seiso for one last time.

"This conversation is going nowhere, is it? It's best if we end it. See you tonight." He said his goodbyes and opened the door, closing it from behind he stepped out of the gate and started to walk to Seiso.

There she is, standing in front of the school's main entrance like a statue; just like before she would run back to her house, lock herself in a room, sit in a dark corner and cry she could do that if only she could move her legs. She didn't have the courage to even move her feet, she was too scared on how the day would even start for her she declares the Tuesday is officially her unlucky day. She slowly drags her feet as she enters the school; she walks slowly with her head hanging low, not showing her face, some people bump her but she didn't mind, and she didn't care.

"Oi Hino!" Someone called out her name, she lifted her head and turned around she saw Tsuchiura-kun waving at her; the tall green-haired boy.

"Ohayou Tsuchiura-kun!" she greeted

"Same here." He replied, they walked side by side entering the building.

"Exams are up, you ready?" He asked her.

"I haven't reviewed much these past few nights because….I'm a little busy."

"With what?" he asked.

"Um…stuff" she replied.

"What kind of stuff? Like your violin?"

"Yeah, one is my violin and the other is….forget about it."

"Come on, you could tell me you know my ears are always open to hear whatever is on your mind."

"I know that, it's just that…" She placed her hand at the back of her neck. "It's a bit complicated." She tried saying.

"Let me guess it's about the ice cube and Akiko-san's wedding right?"

"You're a good guesser Tsuchiura-kun."

"It's not that difficult to figure out, you know."

"It's pretty obvious huh?" he nodded at her.

"So what about those two?" he asked

"I told you just forget about it, it's nothing…serious anyway" she just wanted to keep all the things that had happened between her and Len as well with Akiko; it is private

"Hey are you going to attend the wedding later?" she asked him, he didn't give a pleasant expression on his face "Nah, who knows what I could do with the guy I could just punch him on the face," he explained.

"Even on his wedding day?"

He placed his hands in his pockets "I would do that for a friend" he looked at her, she flushed and quickly turned her head to a different direction "T-thank you…Tsuchiura-kun." She stammered.

"No sweat, I am like your big brother right?" She nodded at him "And as I big brother I will do anything to protect her little sister" she smiled

"I can't thank you enough"

"You don't have to…your smiles are the best payment you could ever give."

She giggled at his words. "Hey what's so funny?"

"I'm sorry," trying to hold her laugh. "It's just that I am not used to hearing you saying cheesy stuff like that."

"Was it cheesy? It didn't sound like it to me." he scratched his head

"Next time I'll bring a tape recorder for you to hear yourself" she teased him

"It's glad to see you that happy" he told her

"Yeah, for all those nights that I cried I can't believe that I still manage to smile even I if I am torn apart."

"If Hirara was here I am bound to know that you will be bursting with laughter right now."

"Hirara-senpai never fails to make me laugh, as well for all of you guys."

"It's a pleasure."

--

"See you Tsuchiura-kun!" Hino waved as they were about to part going to each other's classroom, he just smiled and walked away. Kahoko opened the classroom door and her two best friends were the first ones to greet her.

"Morning Kaho-chan! You're pretty early today!" Mio said

"Yeah I know, I woke up at 6:30." She told them as she heads for her desk

"6:30? Wow that's early and I thought were never an early bird." Nao teased her

"I didn't feel like sleeping anymore." she explained while resting her back on her chair

"Today is…"

"Don't even remind me about that." Kahoko cut Mio's sentence off sharply she just wanted to forget about what would happen after class hours.

Tsukimori Len enters the building and students all look at him as if they have seen a ghost, all surprised and unexpected to see him here because everyone knows what today is for Len and for Akiko, he shouldn't be in school right now he has other things he has to attend to rather than school or the violin. People start murmuring while watching him walk by, he ignores them and just continue walking to his class

"Tsukimori, I didn't expect for you to be here" A lilac haired boy said while giving an amusing smile on his face "Shouldn't you be with Akiko-san?" he asked

"Yunoki-senpai, Akiko-san could handle those things which I clearly know of like the…arrangement of the party, the guest…and things like that instead of me just wasting my time by doing nothing it would be best to spend my time here at school with my violin." He calmly explained.

"At least you could of some use for Tsukimori, you spend too much time with the violin; it's like you love it more than you do with Akiko-san."

"If you only knew," he casually said.

"Hm? And by any chances does that mean?" he asked with curiosity.

"I think it would be best if we would not talk about that, I have to be at my class now. See you" and he walked away, Azuma knew something was not right he was the kind of person who could sense things easily just by one look or by their actions. _Something isn't quite right here_ he thought deeply thinking what 'it' could be.

"DRRIIIIINNNNGGG!!!" the school bell rang and that meant 2 things 1) it was lunch time or 2) end of the school day; and you guessed right it was lunch time. Students arise from their seats exiting the room and the hallways filling with General Ed students making their way to the cafeteria to buy some food and to satisfy their famished stomach.

"Where do you think is a good place to enjoy lunch?" Mio asked her 2 friends while sticking a finger under her chin

"Where do you want to stay Kaho-san?" Nao asked her, but she didn't reply she looked out the window with her chin resting on the palm of her hands

"Kaho-san did you hear me?" she asked again

"…."

"Earth to Kahoko"

"…."

She was now annoyed and shouted at her ear.

"Yo! Kaho-san, stop day dreaming already and get your butt out of that seat!!!" she shouted, to her surprise she fell of, of her seat, making her bottom bump the ground. "Ow…" she weakly said as she stood up, placing her hand on the desk making it as a support while she meekly stands up and rubbing her rear end.

"You didn't have to shout you know you could have just tapped me on the shoulder!" she snapped at Nao while rubbing her painful ears.

"Well my bad, now get your lunch now and let's eat my stomach is nagging me already" then suddenly the 3 heard a growl. "See what I mean?"

"It's like your tummy could hear you Nao" Mio said playfully while sticking her tongue out, very childish of her to do.

"I'm sorry you 2 go ahead I just need to deal with something I'll catch up," she told the two.

"And that something is?" Nao asked while raising an eyebrow and folding her arms in front of her chest

"It's just something important okay? Now will you please, you two may go ahead and feed those stomachs of yours."

Nao sighed in defeat while putting down her arms and placing them to her sides "Fine, fine…let's go Mio." she grabbed her wrist and dragged her out of the room; leaving Kahoko all alone. The truth is she really wasn't in the mood for lunch right now even though she could eat like a bear sometimes; all she wanted was some time alone just to think about her problems. She is inconsolable right now and nothing could help her but being with 'him'.

She made her way to the rooftop, one the places where she would like to stay just feeling the fresh breeze blowing on her face, the place where she could feel so calm and serenity. Leaning on the bars and observing the blue sky with whit puffy clouds that looked like white cotton candy or cotton balls if you prefer. Her violin case lying on one of the benches and beside it is her lunch which she hasn't touched yet; she just brought it with her incase she felt like eating. The suddenly the door started opening, she felt someone's presence behind her assuming it would be Azuma or maybe one of her best friends. She didn't give much notice, not until the person spoke.

"Kahoko." The person said with a very familiar voice; the only voice that pierced through her heart. She turned around to see who it was, her eyes widen when their eyes met shivers were sent down to her spine and her body quivered.

"L-Len?" She said in a shaky voice, "W-what are you doing here?"

"Studying of course," he said in an irritated tone.

"I mean, shouldn't you be with…Akiko-san?" Saying her name, she lowered her head and stared at her feet.

"Could we just not talk about that, that's what people keep asking me this morning the reason why I came here to avoid those questions so if you may please avoid bringing up the topic," he told her impassively, not with feelings that he showed her. He sat on a bench beside her violin case and starring at the girl who changed him in a way he couldn't understand why. She wasn't as beautiful as the other girls in school, she wasn't as rich, she isn't that good with the violin either and yet he his the only girl that he ever respected and caught his attention, unto now he still wonders why of all girls she is the only one that could change his world forever. But he didn't care what he cared about is the love he has for her and that would forever remain in his heart.

Raising her head to look at the blue haired violinist looking him directly in the eye. "Fine, if that's what you want then I have no choice but to do so"

She turned his back on him and leaned on the bars she just wanted to pretend that he was not there because it makes her nervous when she knows that those golden eyes of his were watching her every move. She has an uneasy feeling in her stomach whenever he would observe her but she has a warm feeling in her chest.

Her clumsiness, her tardiness, the way she would embarrass herself in front of him she _hated_ it, but at the same time she _loves_ it. She hated it because she didn't want to show too much embarrassment in front of him, the mistakes she would make playing her violin every time he would tutor her, whenever her face would hit flat on the ground-- who in the world wouldn't be embarrassed by that?

But at the same time _she loved_, she loved it because she knows that he is always by her side, correcting her mistakes, guiding her every step of the way, helping her up whenever she would fall or stumble on the ground, treating her wounds.

He _cared _for her and she understands that; she knew him well like no other else in the world could, except for her mother of course. She knew his every move but what she didn't know the mistake his own son is doing right now.

Feeling bored of just sitting there and just gazing at her, which he _enjoys_ didn't really meant his time so he stood up and stood beside her leaning on the bars just like she did. The two were silent, moments passed without the two even uttering a word or making a sound it was like they were playing a quiet game or those kind of games that the players shouldn't talk or make a sound.

"You haven't eaten your lunch yet." Len spoke first

"I don't feel like eating yet." she responded in a soft tone

"That doesn't sound like you."

"And what could that possibly mean?" She asked him

"The Kahoko I know is _always _hungry and she wouldn't let the opportunity of filling her empty stomach pass." he explained putting a playful smile on his face, his head facing a different direction.

"Say whatever you want, it's my body so I could eat what I want and when I want," she snapped at him.

"Suit yourself." he approached the bench and unpacked her lunch box, she turned around and noticed what he was doing "Hey what are you doing with _my_ lunch?!"

"You said you weren't hungry and it would be a waste to not just eat it, so I thought why don't I eat it." He explained while picking up the chopsticks and picking up a piece of sushi roll,opening his mouth and about to place the piece in his mouth.

"You know it's rude to eat other people lunches without permission," she placed her hands on her waist "Where are your manners?" giving a strict face.

He moved the pair of chopsticks away from his mouth, closing it his mouth he spoke "Well then, Kahoko can I have the permission to eat you lunch?" he asked her, she was annoyed and she knew she lost; she could never win a conversation with him so anyway this is all pointless and going nowhere she just have to give up.

"I could never defeat you in conversations like this" she said and sighed "Fine, you could have it"  
she waved her hand in the air and sat at one of the benches facing him "Thank you" he muttered. She sat across him and watches him as he eats her lunch with delight. _He's nuts _she thought in her head eating her food just like that, who did he think he is anyway? Besides being her mentor, her friend, her enemy, her rival…her first love, the love of her life, the one that holds the key to her heart **(how cheesy)**, her life, her world….he is everything to her and how could you possibly think she could forget him in just a snap? For her it is impossible, one thing she could never do.

"Do you like it?" she asked him.

He swallowed first before he gave a reply "It's really good, I like it a lot did you make it?" "Hai."

He smiled, one of those rare smiles you could see once in a blue moon. "You make a very good cook, or should I say a wife with your cooking skills like this." he explained while continuing to feast on her food. _And I would be most happy if I am your wife, but I won't_ she didn't give any comment and was just quiet. After a few minutes, he laid down the chopsticks and rested her lunch on his lap

"What's the matter? Don't you like it anymore?"

He placed the food to his side "I'm full already, I have to admit that was really good I enjoyed it" he said fixing her lunch pack

"You don't have to do that; I could clean it up myself."

"Its fine, let me do it you permitted me to have it right? So I should at least clean it up for you"

"Ah…T-thank you." after cleaning it up, he faced her, they faced each other looking at each others eyes it felt like magic they both wanted it to last longer but they would look like fools just sitting there and observing one another, what foolishness…

"What are you going to do, Kahoko?" he broke the starring contest between the both of them.

She looked puzzled and asked ,"Huh? I don't quite understand what you mean."

He sighed, closing his eyes. "You never do."

"Well you should state out your point more clearly for me understand better," she retorted.

Opening his eyes, she saw her pouting and crossing her arms in front of her chest, he chuckled.

"You never fail to make me laugh you know that?"

Her face softened but still remaining her arms crossed "Don't flatter me."

He smirked "Back to my question, what are you going to do, now that I am about to be married in a few hours?"

"I thought you were avoiding the topic?"

"It can't be helped, just answer my question Kahoko."

She rested her hands on her side she couldn't think of any possible reply, what is she going to do? She never thought of that, all she ever did was to just cry, cry, cry and cry she never made plans she never intended to make plans. Why would he want to know what was she going to do?

"Why ask?"

"I'm just curious that's all, is it wrong to ask?"

"Not really but…" her head directing to her sides "the truth is I really don't have plans I haven't thought about them yet but…" she paused "the only possible thing I can do…is to just forget everything." she continued

"Forget everything? Could you possibly do that?"

"I don't know but…I'll try"

He stood up, his back stiff; he looked out far into the open seeing the tall building and trees being swayed by the wind; gracefully dancing.

"That's a lie"

Raising a brow, she said "excuse me?"

"That's a lie Kahoko." facing her

"And how could say that I am lying?" she asked

He gave a brief sigh "It's a lie to say you've let go of the past…nobody really let's go of memories."

"Len…"

"Remember this Kahoko because I will just say this once…each tear is an unforgettable memory…each smile is an undeniable mark…each heartbreak is an inerasable scar…nobody could ever let go of memories, there is no such thing as forgetting only acceptance, forgetting the things that have between us could never be forgotten and to think you could just forget it like that? I know I can't, what more if it was you?"

She stood up, slowly approaching him and stopped when she was a few inches away from him. "How could I accept that you would marry someone else? What makes you think I could consider that Len? Do you remember the night when we are at your parents' mansion during the engagement party?" he nodded in reply

"About what I said that I couldn't wait any longer…it…it was a lie, I could wait forever to just get what I want if you truly love someone you would wait for them until the end of the world, I know I would. For me there is no such thing as accepting you being with Akiko-san, never in my life would I consider that Len…"

She could feel tears forming at the corner of her eyes, thinking she wouldn't cry anymore but she failed.

"But you said you'll try to forget everything"

"I mentioned the word 'try' right? I didn't exactly say that I 'would forget' everything…you don't listen to me."

"I just misunderstood."

"I thought you could understand everything, understanding the biggest mistake you made your entire life." she turned around picking up her things and carrying her bag on her shoulders

"I love you, Kahoko," he said before she would leave him…again.

She turned her head to the side, looking over her shoulder. "Do the things that make you happy Len, not just pleasing others but not pleasing yourself…I will…always love you and I will wait for you even until the last day I die." Saying her final words she exited through the door, watching her leave him. _Do the things that make you happy Len, not just pleasing others but not pleasing yourself,_ very striking and pondering her words into his head…he will always remember that, but will he do it? He did everything to make others proud of him, but he didn't do it to make happy. He played the violin to reach his parents' level in music, just to please them, he would be marrying a girl whom his parent's chose to be with without his consent but agrees, just to please them. Clearly he did this to make his parents proud of him choosing the right paths, but not what he wanted. Should he still pursue it?

"You look like a fool just standing there you know," someone said, there he saw standing by the door was his rival Ryoutaro Tsuchiura, he is always irritated when he pokes his head in his business.

"How long have you been there?" Len asked as his intense eyebrows rested above his golden eyes.

"Just now, I saw Kahoko walking down the stairs so I figured she went here then I checked to see for myself what she could have possibly done, and with my expectations it was you and I am correct." He explained.

"You talk too much."

"That's why we have mouths, dummy."

He gave him a death glare but Ryoutaro wasn't afraid of him he didn't fear anything…except for snakes and spiders though.

"Watch your mouth; you can't just call me names."

"You aren't the boss of me; I can call you anything I want."

"Pfftt…what is your business for you being here anyway you are just wasting your time."

"I want to ask you something."

He raised an eyebrow. "And is that something, hm?"

"Are you still going to continue this Tsukimori, marrying Akiko?"

"What does it have to concern you anyway?"

"Nothing, but it does to Hino…and you know how much I hate seeing Hino cry or even just frowning, I am her friend and as a friend I will do anything to keep a smile on her face or preventing her from being hurt"

"But you failed, didn't you?"

Ranging with anger he approached Len and griping tightly unto his collar, making his feet leave the ground, but Len showed no expression or fear in his eyes; he wouldn't be threatened by a jock like him.

"Why are you doing this to Hino?!" he demanded.

"Why do you have to be so demanding when it comes to Kahoko?" he mentioned her by her first name, but he didn't realize.

Releasing his grip on him, he stepped a few feet away from Tsukimori

"That's because I like Hino," he admitted, he never thought he would admit it to anyone; he could have told Hirara about this or even Azuma but why in the world let Len, his arch enemy know about it first, why confess now? Len's eyes widen and his mouth ajar on hearing what Ryoutaro just told him, he couldn't believe this.

"But clearly I could see how affected she is on seeing you getting married and I know that she loves you and not me."

_Glad for you to know that, _Len thought.

"So all I can do now is to just help her for not feeling replaced with a drama-queen and yes I am referring to Akiko-san." He called Akiko a 'drama-queen', but Len didn't care, he didn't mind at all "You choose her over Hino, but you know that she loves you and you still let this go on? How heartless could you be? She is hurting, she said she is healing but I can tell that's not true; be considerate on how others feel for once!" He shouted angrily clenching his fists. His temperature was rising.

He remained silent, which made him more furious than ever.

"You're a jerk, Tsukimori! Remember that!" Slamming the door and stomping down the stairs; he couldn't believe he would not say a word after what he just told him.

"Baka!" He said out loud, people stared at him but he just continued to make his way down the hall, thinking that he has lost his mind.

"_But you failed, didn't you?"_

He's right, Len is right he failed from preventing Hino from being heartbroken and feeling crushed but no one said that he would give up. "You are unforgivable, Tsukimori!" He muttered in a raging tone.

"I will not give up on you, Kahoko."

* * *

Good or bad?

Just let me know what you think about this chappie and give me **reviews**, I need them...hehe

Bye bye and god bless you all!

P.S. Thanks to Pathetic Rainbow who gave me the link...


	10. Chapter 9

Wow! It's finally done!! Woohoo!!! I am having such a hard time updating my stories with such a hectic schedule...(-_-) I wanna thank all of those who reviewed my stories lately, I have new one so please check that out and hope that you'll love it! ....what to say? I'm just glad I'm back...I'm speechless at the moment hehe...have a happy reading!!

P.S. for the reader who's asking my nickname (I forgot your name, sorry!) just call me Nicole or Nicole-san ^-^

* * *

Chapter 9

What would you expect from the Tsukimori Len? Being a famous violinist is one thing; his cold attitude where it was hard to convey is a fact that nobody could ever deny of him, having been on the honor rolls in school? Yes, he did. He is one of those geeks, who would do anything for their grade's sake, no matter how boring the lesson in class may be or even if you could die from boredom, but the Tsukimori Len…let's just say that he would rather focus more on his priorities than to having waste his time in what he calls "useless socializing".

He has been staring up at the blue sky by the classroom's window for over 15 minutes already while resting his chin on his palm, studying the blue heavens being decorated with white puffy clouds seemed so much more enjoyable to Tsukimori than having to listen to his sensei yapping about the theory of this and that non-stop for another 30 minutes. Heaving out a frustrated sigh he doesn't know what he wants or what to do in a critical moment like his in.

_Tick Tock Tick Tock._ The clock seems to be ticking endlessly as his ears would twitch when he knows that just a few hours and he would be out of here, no…not that he is eager to leave…absolutely not that but it was the fact that he would want it better if he would never even leave school and never to return home again so that he could avoid his own wedding. May sound crazy but it is true, there were actually times when he tried to kill himself but he knew dying won't ever solve anything that would only add up to everybody's pain, so very difficult for our 'prodigy'. He knows he doesn't want to break _her_ heart twice and making her shed a thousand more tears but what about his family? He can't let destroy their reputation either. How could you even decide in a situation like this?

He also had a wish, he wanted more time to enjoy himself besides his music and the violin; maybe, he wished for fate to take him back in time where he still had the time with _Kahoko_. Sure he spent most of the time with her during the concourse and their tutoring but he felt that he could have done more for her during those times.

When they first played Ave Maria together during Training Camp, the emotions he never actually felt before started to develop inside of him. And as soon it did, he couldn't even admit to himself that he _loves her. _And he hated himself for that, he actually didn't understand why he denied it but only 2 possible reasons would make up his mind: 1) Maybe he was scared that when he told her that he loved her was because maybe she didn't love him back for the way his been treating her back then and even get busted, but he was wrong 2) He didn't know whether it was actually _love_ or it was just a simple 'crush' or admiration for the girl, truth to be told; wrong again. The hardest thing about growing up is that you have to do what is right for you even if it means breaking someone's heart. Including your own.

"Mr. Tsukimori….Mr. Tsukimori.." Sensei noticed the young lad slacking off in class which was very unlike of Len to do, he has tried to get hold of the boy's attention for the past minute but sadly failed to disturb him in his deep thoughts.

"Mr. Tsukimori…" he barks out his name once again; the whole class turned their attention to him. He suddenly felt their menacing stares and gave into his curiosity, shifting his head back to class he saw his fellow classmates feasting their eyes on him including their sensei's which was rather irritating.

The impatient expression glued on their teacher's face and tapping his foot on the floor only meant that he would get in trouble for dozing off. "I have been calling for your attention for the past minute Tsukimori but you do not seem to respond, is there something of a bother?" sensei questioned as if he was even concerned he just wanted a perfect excuse from the boy.

Without a response he just raised an eyebrow at him and was just silent, his brain did the answering

_Well let's just say that as soon as the longer hand reaches 5 my life is doomed which brings me to marrying a psycho woman who I will become her personal 'puppet' making me leave behind the woman a truly love or the possibility of never seeing her again. Plus it also goes to show that my parents have done a fantastic job to control my life and my future…so far, not much is a bother to me because all I would have to do is just suffer the consequences. Does that seem like a bother to you Sensei?_

Of course he wouldn't give him that kind of answer but if he had the authority he would answer him anytime, but sad to say he is just a student with a lot of problems holed up in his mind after all.

"Ehem…" snapped back once again to earth, he heard their teacher clearing his throat which was more like a sound of impatience and irritation just getting hold of his attention once again. He was already tapping his fingers on the table and hiking up his glasses, giving the atmosphere that intense feeling.

"Care to have an excuse for dozing off in my class Tsukimori?" His voice stiffened when he quivered.

"I…I…w-was just thinking about something sensei," he answered with nervousness which he never felt before.

"Care to share your thoughts with us then on what that 'something' is perhaps? I'm sure my boring class would enlighten your fellow classmates with your sharing Tsukimori…" Sensei already began to be serious; Tsukimori of course didn't fear the teacher. He doesn't fear anything….well, except for spiders (a guy being afraid of spiders is like so gay)

"It's just…It would just be a waste of time, forgive me for my behavior sensei…please do carry on with the lesson sensei."

"How can I be certain that you will listen this time Tsukimori?"

"I will sensei…I will," Len tried his best to say.

Their sensei wasn't convinced by his words but seeing that he didn't want to be pursued any further he only gave a grunt and gave Len one last death glare which sent shivers down the other pupils' spines. However, for Len it was nothing for him to actually fear since he was the best in Seiso to ever do death glares; so he just treated it like a fly passing by and began to yawn. Reading the description on the textbook once again, his sermon was enough for Len's ears and hearing him talk some more might give him a migraine if this would continues; well at least he wasted 8 or 9 minutes of their time earlier.

_Blah…Blah…Blah…Blah…Blah_ the words Len could hear playing endlessly inside his head for the pass 20 minutes already. Seriously, doesn't their sensei get tired from all that blabbering? He just wished that his jaw would fall of and no more listening for one day. Resting his head on his desk he could feel his eyelids growing heavy and are about to close but he can't sleep in class, he doesn't want to hear his scolding again…geez. He could feel his body growing light and eyes already half closed. Suddenly the playing of a violin sounds in his ears almost like a lullaby; not knowing if it is for real or only played by his mind but even so he can't deny that the music is marvelous and enchanting to the soul, only making our poor Len even more drowsy. He tries to keep his eyes wide open but he is even to lazy to lift his own head from his desk because sleeping is less boring than having to hear your teacher talk all day about this and that right? And with that thought he finally fell asleep…in class.

_After 10 minutes_

"You see class… in a solution of water and an electrolyte, like the acid in the lemon, an excess of electrons collects on one end of the electrodes. At the same time, electrons are lost from the other electrode which changes chemical …" his discussion was interrupted when he suddenly heard a strange sound, so did the whole class.

"What's that sound?" he asked aloud making the other students wonder themselves.

*snore…snore*

The sound was like a pig, no…a boar? *snore* everyone began to speculate finding out where it was coming from. Shifting their eyes to their 'prodigy' they all saw the raven haired boy sleeping like an angel, some of the girls in the class began to squeal and giggle from how Len looked when he's asleep. Like an angel I tell you. But even so, his snoring didn't find the other girls as cute no one knew that Len _actually _snores.

"_Snore…snore…snore_" his snoring made the whole class burst out into laughter, the loud sounds filled the room and despite for everybody being so happy their strict sensei was already fuming with anger and his face red hot from all the range. He walks up to Tsukimori's desk (it's just good to know that he doesn't drool) and loudly clashes his book on his desk with a loud _BAG!_ Just enough to wake the sleeping boy up and what an alarm that is.

"Huh?! What happened?! Did a building collapse or something?!" There is no doubt that he is wide awake. From the way he just reacted, everyone still kept on laughing making Len feel embarrassed than ever. Red stains started to invade his cheeks

"Sleeping in my class Tsukimori is not an exception and yet you told me that you would pay attention in class."

"I know sensei, forgive me once again my mind doesn't seem to be in the mood today."

"Your apologies won't do any good. I am sure your mind will be in work once you head to the Principal's office and there is where you could have a nice chat with the principal"

"But…I…" he sighed "I will sensei." he stood up from his sit, facing him and bows in apology. The room was quiet once again. "I promise for this to never happen again, my apologies once again."

"I know that you are having a rough time Tsukimori but if you choose to be here in class than rather having to be excused for the day then I should expect from you to listen and to not sleep or doze off. You may be Ms. Hamai's son but you shall be treated like any other pupil here in Seiso, am I clear?" he clearly pointed out.

"Hai, I perfectly do…I shall leave now." Again the room was intense when Len headed out of the classroom and their sensei still standing in the middle of the room heaving out a heavy sigh. He took the book from his desk and began to discuss once again.

_Well at least a trip to the Principal's Office is much better than having to sit in class for 16 more minutes…yawns…my neck hurts so badly, must be from the position I was sleeping in. That was really embarrassing but the nap was worth it though _he rubs the nape of his neck while walking through the narrow hall as his feet leads him to the office.

_Knock…Knock…_

A faint sound was heard at the wooden door, an old man that goes by the name Mr. Tawashima sits cozily in his leathered brown chair which wasn't facing his desk but instead facing the glass window in his office "Come in!" he calls out giving permission for that person to enter.

The screech of the door was heard when Len had entered the room, turning his chair to face the person. He raises a brow when he sees the boy standing in front of his desk, a smile curling up his lips and clasped his hand under his chin, resting both of his elbows on his desk.

"Tsukimori, I didn't expect you to be here today…shouldn't you be preparing for the wedding? It is today, isn't it?"

"Yes it is, and it is the only thing my mind is thinking about…" _not like I am pleased about it_ "I just thought of taking the time off with the preparations I am sure Akiko and mother can manage, I am a boy after all guys aren't expert when it comes to special occasions."

"Well you should be, it is your wedding after all…"

"The thought of it irritates me already, can we please change the topic?" he answered flatly

The old man began to chuckle "Take a seat, Tsukimori," he offered.

"Thank you." He sat down on the sofa which was positioned only a few feet from his desk, facing the desk side ways.

"So, what brings you here? Some advice perhaps?" he asked keeping the smile plastered on his face and still resting his chin on his clasped hands.

"I got into trouble," he responded grimly.

"Trouble? What have you done Tsukimori?"

"I was caught dozing off and sleeping in class," he answered kind of embarrassed for having a student like him to just idle during class hours

"My, and why doze off? Do you have something in mind which bothers you? Not like it's unpredictable for me to not guess."

"You clearly already know the answer to that," having said uninterested in the topic.

"You clearly seem to not be in the mood today but very well then, do you have problems with the marriage?" he quivered while resting his back on the chair

"We aren't married yet" he quickly stated

"You will be in a few hours, what's the difference?"

"There's a huge difference…" he paused for a while to sigh "and to answer your question; yes, I am having problems with my engagement, which is more like what you should call it" he coldly corrected the man.

"Ok, ok. You really are in a bad mood today Tsukimori" he scoffed

"…"

"Then do you mind telling me what complications are there with Akiko-san? She seems to be your perfect match after all."

_Clearly it's just the same old thing what people keep on telling me about Akiko, I find it very irritating. _He grunts in his mind, "What everyone else says as well…"

"What? And you are not pleased with the idea of it? Don't tell me you think that this is all a disaster," his voice tainted with little disbelief.

"Much more than that," he answered, eyes fixed on the carpet.

"Tsukimori…I…what is going on?" the old man started to demand.

"I can't tell you unless you find out for yourself…it would just ruin the fun of it," he said eyes closed but with a smirk played on his face.

"The fun of it?" voice came a yielding tone "Clearly I do not like this game."

"Oh come on, you're old. Someone like you should play games and kick the load of, you know what I mean" he turned to face him. What he expected to see his smiling expression turned out to be one full of authority, which was rather…scary.

"Fine I'll tell you…" he breathed in deep to collect first his thoughts and then exhaled. He can't believe he would confess to their Principal. Someone he least expected to tell the truth to, but he would have to let out his feelings somehow asides from Hino. All he has to do is just say the right words and it'll be all fine and if the old man doesn't have such a big mouth then, there is nothing to worry

"I don't love Akiko" he first said almost in a whisper almost impossible for a man of the age of 54 to even hear

"Huh? Please repeat that Tsukimori."

"I don't love Akiko." This time, not in a whisper but his voice was still low and again, not possible to hear

"Do you really think I could hear you boy? Only an ant would with your voice, saying it clearly and a little louder"

"I don't love Akiko!" yelling solved the old man's hearing which he was surprised by his action but even more shocked on what he just heard. Silent for a few moments and mouth in agape he was almost speechless to having confessed on the day of the ceremony was such a wrong timing.

_This boy really doesn't know how to manage his time, does he? _"Is this still part of the game Tsukimori? Don't play games with me" he was eager to know that it was just a joke

"Frankly I'm not good in joking with people…forgive me if I am being rude, but what I say is the truth, I don't love Akiko at all" saying without hesitation. He never thought he would have the guts to let it out at such a moment.

The words Len just told him still didn't seem to register in his mind but upon seeing the sinister look on his face; he is dead serious about this and so he should handle it the same way. The then atmosphere became different.

"Well…that's much…unexpected Tsukimori" voice colored with much disbelief "Do your parents know of this? More importantly, does Akiko know?"

Len opened his eyes, authenticity written all over them, "Of course they don't."

"Why so? I call for a reason Tsukimori!" he says waving his hands in the air.

"I never intended to" he rises from the couch nearing to the glass window, meeting his gaze outside its frame, the man follows his direction

""Why not? If they did then all of this would have been cancelled sooner." he began to rub his chin with his thumb and forefinger

"I didn't want to because I didn't want to destroy our family's reputation with the Sakamoto's if I declare my true feelings now or even back then, then situations would be different; I wouldn't be here in Seiso anymore because I wouldn't want to bare the shame I have caused my parents. Also, my future is in stake; after the wedding Akiko and I are scheduled to leave for Vienna to having pursue our music careers and education at the same time."

"So it's like your just using Akiko for your education and wants, huh Tsukimori?" the old man assumed him.

"Does it really seem that way?" quivering, he sits on the window pane.

"To me it does, but understanding things for your parents can be thoughtful of a son but still, haven't you thought of what bigger consequences you and your family would have to meet if they found out the truth themselves in the end?" Mr. Tawashima concluded.

_Sure he's right, but matters won't change so why worry about it now__**? "**_Life is not what about what I've done, what I should've done, what I could've done…It's about what I can do and what I will do."

"And that would be marrying someone you don't love? Is that your plan for life Tsukimori…what a stupid life you will have" he muttered but enough for Len to hear. True, if that would be his future to be with Akiko it would be better to not leave at all. He had thoughts that maybe he could learn to love Akiko like the way she loves him but as long as he reminisces _those _memories he knows that would take an eternity.

"Take chances. Tell the truth. Marry someone totally wrong for you. Say no. Spend all your cash! Fall in love. Get to know someone random. Be random. Say I love you. Sing out loud. Laugh at a non humorous joke. Cry. Get revenge. Tell someone how much they mean to you. Tell the asshole what you feel. Let someone know what they're missing. LIVE LIFE! If you want to spend the rest of your life like that Tsukimori for me it is much better to set the truth free than rather to live a life full of regrets, trust me on this one" The words of wisdom Mr. Tawashima had just said has already done a great effect on Len; what may come his way will be all of his consequences in the future. His right, live an honest life instead of a lie.

"And I thought being a teen is nothing but fun, but it also seems that it causes so much perish don't it?" Len joked around and then faintly chuckled. He still manages to smile even for his circumstances.

"It is God's test…he is testing you up to where can go from here" he said those words right out of his mouth from experience; he too has mistakes he regrets with for the rest of his life. It's hard to take chances but it is better if you do.

"Sometimes I think Experience is the worst teacher…" Len spoke of on what was on his mind. He stood from the window pane and began to walk around the room, exploring the place.

"And why say so?" Mr. Tawashima swung his chair from side to side in little movements as he follows his gaze on the raven haired boy inside his office.

"Because it gives the test before presenting the lessons; any student would fail if a teacher did that" he said at some point. He began to scan the picture frames that were placed on the shelves and ones that were hanged on the wall

"Make sense to me…" the old man said "and one more thing Tsukimori…" he called his attention.

"What is it?"

"What do you do now? Now that you plan on proceeding with the wedding shouldn't you at least think of a way to escape this mess you made?" he was trying to help him by giving him good enough choices, since that it is all he could actually do for him. He didn't want to interfere as much as he sees that he badly needs assistance.

He stops from his pacing to and from the shelves to the walls; he closes his eyes and heaves an aggravated sigh, slumped his back on the wall and arms folded; he sets a straight look towards the man

"I don't know…" he frankly said "…I may not be prepared for the future but I would just have to do my best and hopefully solve the problem as fast as I could without even harming anyone else, having one person being involved is torture enough"

"Huh? Another person involved? And who could that be Tsukimori?" Mr. Tawashima began to raise a brow at the young boy; who carelessly might reveal another secret

"Ah…it's no one…forget about what I said…" Len, trying to change the subject

"I can't just forget about a person's worries, most certainly he or she needs help…"

_Tsk…like you're helping me…_Len thought sarcastically while rolling his eyeballs

"I told you she--…this person's fine, can we now please talk about something else?" he ordered grumpily trying to divert his situation.

He already revealed one of his most inner secrets; he can't reveal any information about the relationship he has with _Kahoko_ it's too personal and private for him to talk about it to any one. Especially not to this _man,_ he doesn't even know if he could be trusted about this or not; he just hopes that he can.

Mr. Tawashima placed a disappointed look on his face with his smile upside down "You are hiding something from me Tsukimori, you'll feel better once you let it out…now come on you could trust me. I am the Principal of the school after all and I care deeply for my students so you have nothing to worry about" he tried to talk him into a calming manner gaining his trust.

He sounded pretty convincing to Len but words don't speak everything. He can't "I'll tell you when I say so, right now is absolutely not the right time to discuss it with you so please…don't force me into it."

"Oh come on Tsukimori…uh, fine…have it your way then" his plead was inducing for him to give in and just give up. This boy knows how to play along.

He played a smirk across his face declaring himself victorious "Looks like I've been here long enough, do you think I should get going now?"

Mr. Tawashima raised his wristwatch to his face and estimated the time they both had "Hmmm…yes you should, you're sensei might be suspicious of what is taking you so long to be here"

Tsukimori sent a grudge "I'd rather spend my time here than sit in class the whole day…"

Len heard his laugh "Stubborn as you are, aren't we Tsukimori?" He stood up from his desk and walked to the door, turned the door knob and held the door open for him to leave "You have to go; I still have a lot of paper works to finish"

"Well at least I used most of my time enjoying myself here…" his back left the wall and straight forwardly he walked through the door. His presence had left the room

But before Mr. Tawashima could close the door completely he still left it partly open and let himself speak "I had a good talk my boy, I haven't had a conversation like that in years time I must that from all the love life stories I've heard from other people yours is the most…convoluted yet it has an interesting way of how it will end"

Len can't say whether his love life is interesting but it was convoluted. He often times he thought that relationships and love is just a nuisance "Maybe because I am the only fool who did such a thing"

"Mmmm…can't agree with you more anyways inform me on how things work out ok?"

He looks at him from the shoulder "Yes, I will."

The squeak of the door sounded when the man gave one last smile before closing the door completely. Len directed his head from him and gave another frustrated sigh. The smallest thing in life changes something forever and there will be times when you wish you can go back to how things used to be but you just can't because things have changed so much. That's why we are given choices and decisions to see if we can already stand up on our own but it seems like Len can't; assuring himself that he can do this and that only lead him to becoming a helpless young boy who asks for nothing but for fates' second chance, just because someone messes up once doesn't mean that within time they can't find a way to change for the better.

What he asks for is time. What he hopes for is one more possibility.

What he needs is one way on how to change life.

What he needs is happiness and love.

What he needs is their forgiveness.

* * *

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	11. Chapter 10

**Minna-san! The 10th chapter is finally here! Thank God almighty! hahaha....**

**It took me all night to just finish this chappie. I thank Annalisemarie99 once again for beta-ing this fanfic of mine! Love yah loads big sis....**

**Bad news guys, *sighs* my computer however broke down and I am just currently using the computer of my crazy classmates who has a wild imagination but that's not the point, the point is it'll take some time before I might update my other fics!!!! It's a huge bummer, seriously. **

**I'm hating life more than ever. Sorry Sera-chan!!!! -_-.....**

**Please enjoy this chapter because it might take a few more months or even maybe a year before the next chapter is published. Wahhh! I hope u guys can wait!!!! *sniffs* **

**But for now, please DO enjoy it! ^^  
**

* * *

Kahoko Hino is just a sunny person.

Dejection was never in her vocabulary and somebody had to teach her about that word. What did it mean anyway?

However, time took its count for her to realize that she was already living in it. Minutes passed that seemed like forever whenever she stared idiotically at the clock's moving hands only reminding herself that tonight will be her very lover's wedding ceremony while all she does at home is lay in bed, miserably curled up into a ball and crying like a 5 year old girl who lost her favorite toy.

She finally welcomed life into her bedroom. You can't blame her for that right? It was her fault why situations had gone from here. That night, she could have just walked away and never looked back because she knew very well the consequences, but the love she couldn't repress for him compelled her actions because she believed that it would've been worth it. And for the record, it was. Telling her he loved her woke her up from her fairytale into live action scenes on the balcony while locating beneath the sky's glimmering stars weren't just a dream she intends to remember forever, but it was a memory no, it was a moment she _wanted _to remember forever every time she closed her eyes to picture his face smiling brightly at her and phrasing the words 'It'll be alright', then she would open them again because she knew it was just a lie.

All she ever wanted was _him. _She could ask for nothing more but when did wanting something so badly hurt this bad? She fell in love, was it her wrong to follow her heart instead of acting with her mind? Their love is forbidden, yes, she fully comprehends to that, but they can't stop themselves from being apart even just for a day. Today is a torture and tomorrow will be the end of it when she wakes up the very first thing; recognition will hover in her brain about the idea of her lover from being a boy to becoming a man, who is not _her_s anymore but Akiko's.

Len cheated on her because he didn't actually love her which only snaps out the answer that he deserved better. _He deserves her for the better and so does she! _The crying, the sleepless nights, the love, all the pain were still a secret to the world because no one had to know about the lie Len paraded to his parents and the bitchy attitude she portrayed for stealing someone else's man.

However, for once in her 17 years of life, she wanted to let the world know that she's already owned and that she owned someone too but how could she? She bloody can't even hold his hands in public. She suffered everyday ever since that encounter at Fuyuumi's villa, everything changed; her heart was pricked with a dagger, her eyes was always red from crying, her chest was heavier than a brick wall and what hurts her the most is to know that Len really loves her, only making the decision of letting it all go less easier to handle.

Blue didn't match with red, ice always got melted away with fire, snow melted in the summer, April is never meant for September but who knew they would actually fall in love. They belong to one another, they belong _together_ so why can't it be that simple to handle? Is it because she's not talented like Akiko? Not as pretty? Not as rich? Or maybe not that smart? Oh for kami's sake, she doesn't care! Neither does Len, he loves her for who she is because she's the person who Len came to love and she didn't have to pretend just to be loved. Why can't it be easy like 1+1? Why can't they just be like any other lovers?

Because it never was easy from the start.

Life's just a gaping hole full of challenges settled for you as trap; you falter for one minute then you're caught in the deep, having to battle with weakness and loosing your pride. Strength is your only power to savor in the sweet wine of victory, however for Kahoko…

She's already drowning herself in the bitter taste of conquer

"Loosing the battle already?" a husky voice from behind circled her ears and tickled her skin by the hot breathe that pressed over her. Escaping a little scream from her lips she jumped up from her sit and her face turned pale when her eyes fell on a certain person's purple hair with the sweet, fake smile plastered on his angelic visage. God, now is not the time for her to be insulted.

"Y-Yunoki-senpai! Y-you scared me, please don't do that again!" Kahoko exclaimed. Azuma glared at her, seeking to be fascinated by her reaction from his 'teasing' exploit. If she didn't love that blue-haired violin boy he would have had her right now. He continued to study her as she took a deep breathe trying to collect all of her thoughts about her current stand in this situation, which he shattered through her train of thoughts.

"Gomenasai, Hino-san but I can't help but stare at your upset face all day." His smile destroyed his devilish façade only illuminating to be true that he's nothing but a bamboozle in their school; Kahoko always thought he had such a sweet smile but only hard to believe that it was never even the real Azuma to what she perceived during their first meeting. Life is full of surprises, it's just waiting for the person who to surprise with.

Her eyes widened "Wh..why are you staring, Yunoki-senpai?"

Azuma's warm laugh filled her ears that only colored at the mockery and teasing to the relaxing sound she was hearing right now, "Oh Hino, you are so cute whenever I see that reaction of yours but I never thought you would be this stupid whenever it comes to speeches. Where are your logics?"

He never got tired of Kahoko's denseness; in fact, it never ceased to amaze him how clueless she's been during the conditions. His always contented himself by watching her everyday with that shine gone from her eyes and the frown that was on no account never gone but still, it never got to his heart. Horrible isn't it? For the past week, he's been taming his actions to distract himself from granting such further insults but by all means, just looking at her like that amazingly annoys him and couldn't control to restrain his fleets any longer.

"Please Yunoki-senpai, I-I'm not in the right form to be insulted right now don't you think? Tease me all you want but please…I-I'm having a really hard time already a-and…I just…"

"…you want me to stop" Azuma finished her sentence. Guilt didn't wash over him even if Hino looked more offended than with the last mockeries he did. He is such an ass, but nobody knew that

"Hai, I'm already upset about Len so don't stay here if you're only going to insult me the whole day; it doesn't help" Kahoko explained while Azuma could only shrug. This is why she hates him so much, his always this insensitive and could never cope up with her position may it be in the worst phase or not, he didn't care just as long as he got his treat by all means mocking her until she cried. The classic bully.

She got used to his tactics. It didn't make her weaker, it only made her more determined to prove to him she wasn't as stupid as the others. But hell was she wrong with him, so wrong and he knew that all to well, "Aww, come on now, Hino you do know it hurts my feelings whenever you say that to me."

"Oh please" she rolled her almond brown eyes "Stop the drama Yunoki-senpai and just tell me what you're here for, I clearly _hate_ you games"

Coherent ideas weren't even an excuse anymore, he just loves it when he gets to fool her whenever he got chances. She was his favorite toy, "Fine, if you want to know then I'll tell you…"

He circled around her before settling his body down on one of the rooftop's bench; he felt his hair swaying behind his back by the rustling winds. Such a fine day for everyone and yet he still has to deal with the miserable one. He just couldn't help his own thoughts "Well let me just say that you're an idiot Hino-san, you're being insensible about everything that's going on lately…"

"I thought I just said that…"

"I heard you, no insults I get it" he paused to gasp hot breaths "but I'm stating a fact and you're still finding the answer when it's already standing right in front of your eyes"

Kahoko rose her eyebrows "What?" her voice tainted optimism beyond knowing that she'll still won't resolve it. Azuma's heart filled chuckle filled her ears yet again, she couldn't tell whether he was mocking her or he was just really happy to seeing her like that. She couldn't tell between the two..

"You always fascinate me Hino; too bad you're taken, but the solutions to your problems are very simple if you examine it all well in your head."

"I was just doing that when you suddenly surprised me a few minutes ago," she snapped insistently.

"Really?" He grinned "None of it was my fault, to be frank I knew instantaneously the one result when Amou explained to me all about this…turmoil."

"Y-you do?" She widened her eyes with the nature of anticipation growing within her two irises, the voice in her throat seems to pitching more optimism than he had expected. One action he never ought to get from her.

He nodded sympathetically "I do…even a 5 year old child does, you just ran away."

The glint disappeared after that, her face looked the same when he found her sitting here all alone a little while earlier. Disappointment naturally passed her features; it didn't surprise him from her change of action because he always knew how vulnerable she was with every position "I don't get it, how does running away solve all of this?"

"Do I have to be the one to do the math, Hino?" Kahoko furrowed her eyes with more confusion; Azuma had no choice but to solve his own equation intended for her. He sighed frustratingly, "Look, 'running away' is just a figurative term I didn't mean literally run away from your problems but its base upon acting on logic. I know you care about Len and you don't want to hurt Akiko either but you _do _know that there's only one option for you to just forget it all happened. In a sense that it'll hurt both of you but you'll realize later on that it was nothing to regret about."

Kahoko permitted the stillness to overpower her; she sunk in his words into her mind for her to solve the puzzle. By running away, did he mean giving it all up? No, she can't do that. She never gives up. _Never. _Not with all the promises he made to her, they have desires. Desires twisting into certainty when it's all over, she can't throw it away not right now even if time is complicated, she just couldn't. She wanted what her heart always wanted and it seemed that her head was putting up with a logical fight on why she should be looking out for his well-being. Yet her heart was screaming at the head to shut up and keep holding onto him. To always, hold on, forever.

"I…I can't do that. No, I won't do it!" the glimmering tears were already appearing, the choke cry from her throat proved she wouldn't be able to last long with suppressing.

Azuma grieves over at her stubbornness "Be reasonable Hino, it'll hurt but the pain will pass. You know you have to do this"

"Bloody hell knows that but I can't do it! I love him too much to let him go, it'll break him." Nothing could be compared to the streaming tears pouring down her face, she looks so wretched during her vulnerability. Pain began to build up between the throbbing of her heart and her fragile chest; no, it can't hurt right now. She hasn't even done anything yet.

"Acknowledge to the juncture Hino, you can't refuse this. Do you want Len to suffer more?"

She didn't want to wince at the outcome of her answer but she knew very well she would have to sacrifice all of it in the end, "N-no."

"Then you have no other alternative, gomenasai, but it has to be this way but we need to give up certain feelings just to do the right thing no matter how it badly it would hurt. Situations were never easy from the start Hino, you know that right?"

She breathed in heavy oxygen through her nostrils for her to regain composure again; its stabbing pain would still be merited if she knew the whole concept and so if Len did too. Azuma's right, he always was. She never saw the product that all of her effort of fighting and pretending to be strong just for him only meant letting it all go, the deed was far more than just plain difficulty. One small evident action could shatter her into a million pieces.

"Then, w-what do you want me to do?" her lips were trembling from sudden weeping, her voice couldn't be compared to a mouse

Azuma came with little pity, "I can't answer that because you have to question yourself. It's all up to what you're going to do to him, I'm not even involved with your havoc and don't even bother to drag me in to your problems Hino. Just be thankful I found you _one_ solution."

Kahoko noted the infuriation within his immoral tone, the pissed off looked inside his two eyes spoke for itself. She didn't ask for his help in the first place but she couldn't tell him that after returning him the favor of answering all of these bloody questions piling up inside her head. It just bothered if it was the _only _answer to the question.

Azuma was tired of waiting. He stood up from where he sat and outlined the hostile visage he never gave. "I'm not going to be sitting here all day waiting for you to act like a mature adult which you should perfectly act during times like these but you're not, you're acting like an ignorant girl who could think nothing less but the love she has. Need I inform you that nothing lasts forever Hino; you'll eventually forget about him in the end so stop thinking about your pain for once and be considerate about Len's because he's already giving up so much just for you. Don't you think he has done too much? This is the only thing you can repay him with"

"How does this repay him? By gifting him with all the guilt?!"

Azuma took a step foot closer and bent down to whisper in her ear before his devious smirk appeared, "No, by simply returning all the pain he caused you."

Her eyes widened, her lips parted to set it ajar. Azuma lovingly stroked her red curls at the end of her hair and pulled himself away from her to study her inevitable outward show. He stared at her for longing minutes of anticipation lingering over his lovely eyes but the indication inside those orbs were fully intended to hurt her just to let him go instead of being her guiding way. However, Azuma did know that it was also the possible way for both of their frustration to cease and even maybe a slight opportunity too finally have her. To be with her all the time. To warmly hold her in his arms. To let the warmth of her body flow through his. To hold her hand whenever she's upset. To love her even though her love would never be his; he knew the outcoming of all his chances. He just needed the right one.

"W-what…you can't just say that…I…no, how ruthless can you get?" tears trailing down her pale cheek rewinds from her earlier weeping, but now rage and at the same time disbelief stained her brown irises.

"It's my nature; do you think it's that easy for you to be smiling at every single person I pass by every tiring day? I've shown who I really am to only you and I intend to remain it that way as long as I can handle."

"But why?" she quivered under his cold hands cupping her wet cheek

"Because," he looked directly into her deep eyes, "I love fooling people, that is why."

She quickly shoved his hand away from her face as she took a few steps back away from his distance, the tremble of her body weren't oblivious to his eyes but the reigning terror in her façade were the first ones he took notice. He escaped a laugh, knowing he had gone too far. He loved it when he was too fast for her lead. Kahoko never took her eyes off him during his time of happiness which was his deceiving insults she always got from him every damn day, she always classified Azuma as the devil's little helper because the label always suited perfectly when he does this to her. She won't take the name of insult back.

"Stop staring Hino, I know you think of me as a 'devil's little helper', right?"

Crap. Can he read her mind too? She wouldn't be utterly surprised if he was the devil himself.

"I'm being too harsh but that never even stopped me," his devilish image obliterated his angelic snicker once again. "But this time, I'll go easy on considering you already suffered too much for that heart of yours couldn't abide such torment, but remember to do as of what I have just suggested to you Hino. You'll have to thank me sooner or later for that."

Her eyes never let his disappearing figure until he exited through the metallic door. Her body slid down to the ground until she implanted her butt to an uncomfortable position but that wasn't what concerned her right now. About everything, that Azuma just said that finally descended deep into her mind only one-question wriggles inside. Should she do it? She hated taking chances but this is may be the only chance she has. _"Need I inform you that nothing lasts forever Hino; you'll eventually forget about him in the end so stop thinking about your pain for once and be considerate about Len's because he's already giving up so much just for you. Don't you think his has done too much? This is the only thing you can repay him with"._

A payment? Is this all it is?

She couldn't believe it, she didn't want to believe it, even though someone as clever as Azuma had already led her to a clear pathway she still hated taking chances. She'd stayed faithful to someone who was using her the way a nineteenth century lord used a mistress. Wait, why did the thought of 'using her' suddenly popped up in her mind? He never lied to her about simple things, he was always the honest man everyone took him as and he never got to falter that kind of reputation. Why did it have to be him? This wasn't some clichéd romance where she would stop at the airport and run back to promise him that he would always be in her heart, she couldn't do that and she wouldn't do that. Even though she knew tomorrow was going to be like ripping something out of her chest, throwing it on the ground and stomping on it just to make sure it hurt a lot more than it should. She knew that she shouldn't have gotten close to him. Payback was a bitch, yeah it surely was.

Prying herself with relationships she shouldn't be ruining is a mistake she wholeheartedly accepts. Too long, too late, she shouldn't have made him wait for her, instead falling into the wrong pits of time for the both of them, she always classified herself as a incompetent fool. Not even for a single moment in time did she change that authentic fact.

--

"Class is over, everyone walk home safely now."

That was it. That was a signal saying he would officially enter the gates of hell without any loopholes being recovered for him to pass through. Now, though he didn't want to admit it, Kahoko was definitely screwing with his head because, somehow, in the most irritatingly clichéd way ever, she'd gotten under his skin and had lodged tightly somewhere in the vicinity of his heart.

Len detested clichés and he detested words that should never have been said but most of all, he absolutely detested the fact that those words, the ones he'd shared with her by the balcony at Fuyuumi's villa, meant so much more than he thought they ever would. He just couldn't figure out if it was the words that mattered or if it was the girl he'd said them too that was screwing with his mind. There was no way in hell he could absolutely forget about her.

He walked out of the room, already feeling the start of his torture as his feet moved even slower when the halls were crowded with the unfamiliar faces of students. He paced his way like that until he left the premises of the building. Standing at the other end, he stared dramatically at the school's enticing gates almost as if it was whispering in his ears the words of the acts he shouldn't be doing at all, but the unknown voices floating in his head urges him to take little steps forward until he was only a few feet away from exiting his only sanctuary from escaping the arranged marriage dooming his life in a nightmare.

He's gone crazy, He'd forgotten what happened to his body when he'd pushed himself beyond his limit. Why was he still walking? God, this couldn't be happening. He actually decided to marry her?! What about Kahoko? Would he want to make her suffer and wait again like last time? No, he didn't wish for that…he didn't want her to shed tears for him again because he wasn't worthy being cried over for, he's just a simple boy who has damned his own life in a dead end.

Sacrifice. Len winced at the word even as how much he had sacrificed taunted him slightly. She was just part of that world that he couldn't have. Not now at least. Just like the ever-growing rift between him and his family couldn't be healed now. His fist clenched at the thought, how much more was he going to have to sacrifice for a dream that was achievable to only a minority?

Don't go down that path Len, he told himself firmly. He turned his mind away from it, knowing that if he questioned what he was doing now; his thoughts were going to go around in circles. Instead, his thoughts immediately returned to her.

She was one sacrifice he couldn't seem to push out of his mind; one sacrifice that he couldn't push from his mind when he wanted to. She was stuck there, immovable, and he wished to God that it had been what he'd told himself at the end. He wished that it really was just a summer fling. One that was harmless enough and left no scars that threatened to open whenever the subject turned to her.

Was it fair? Len wondered, to feel something for her, to glimpse a life he'd always envied and then have it whisked away the minute they all realized he'd found the perfect time to make his mark? He wasn't this stupid before he actually felt love for a certain red head, she had an immense affect on him! She was totally screwing his head with her beautiful image, red locks and impelling music that his ears always soared into that alluring sound. She was so addictive.

"Len?" a voice suddenly shattered his thoughts. He automatically turned around, eyes widened with a bolt from the blue, he saw the one person his mind had been thinking of the whole day. Still, he wasn't sure if it was best to see her in times like these but he was just happy to see her. Amazingly happy that he couldn't really explain fully the feeling.

"Kahoko," he loved it every time her name trickled through his lips, it was a new feeling for him again

"Are you…going home?" She still seemed uncertain with her question. He simply nodded at her, not knowing what she wanted him to say "So, you finally decided to…m-marry her?"

The scene turned pitch black. How could she assure herself that he would do that? There were things Len didn't understand about her and there were things he still didn't know, but swearing to herself that this deal is sealed for him and Akiko is a trait he always knew she never had. What changed her? No, what _made_ her change her?

"What?" A jumble of words still rippled through his mind as he still couldn't outcome the words he wanted to say, "No, I'm not…you know that. I was just going to—"

"You should," her voice drove him off.

"I should what?"

She starred gravely into his dumbfounded image. For the first time ever, her face impassively spoke to him with threatened eyes, "You should marry her."

He stopped breathing. The ticking of the clock seemed to be ringing louder than ever. He heard her but not one of her words seemed to be digesting into his mind._"You should marry her"_, did he hear right? She wanted him to marry her? Marry Akiko Sakamoto? A woman he never came to love and only thought of as a friend? It wasn't just a summer fling. It wasn't. Damn it, why couldn't it have just been a summer fling that left him grinning at stupid memories? Why did it have to be a summer fling where warm, happy memories of curling up by the balcony were evoked simply by hearing the sound of her voice?

Her voice, he hadn't realized he'd needed to hear it so badly, hadn't realized that the soft, warm voice could be so reassuring. Because he knew that if he thought about it, he wouldn't sleep. Len clenched his fist and fought back the urge to punch something. He knew all too well this isn't what she actually wanted him to do.

"What?" No other words could be formed from his mouth. Darn it.

"I said you should—"

"I heard what you said Kahoko, but I just can't believe you want me to do it. Are you serious?" He started to quiver from his sudden question. His instincts knew that he feared her expected answer

"I do."

And his instincts were never wrong. "But why?" he mumbled the words almost in a faint whisper, but Kahoko fully grasped his utters and started to inhale another bucket full of oxygen to cool off her brain.

"Because," she started "I finally decided that I'll have to let you go."

Speechless he was, not a sound from his throat could even come out. He could just stare at her face, the face he never grew tired dreaming of; he couldn't help but feel a twinge of disappointment and maybe…hurt? Of course, he was in pain, who wouldn't feel pain in a situation like his? Her words to him were just unacceptable and most certainly…unbelievable. Why? Only one question ringing inside his head was: _why?_ Why would she do it? Why give up? Why let it all go? Why let _him_ go? Damn, even with all of these questions filling inside his head he knew none of them would even be answered, not even a single one because he always feared the answers. Stupid ego.

"When did you decide that?" he somehow still remained his voice unwavering, not showing the slightest signs of the sting.

She shrugged it off, "I guess a few hours ago"

"But why? Why would you decide something like that? I told you I'll think of a solution, I can still make things work for us. We can still be together; it'll need little more time. Just—"

"STOP!" the sudden yell of her interjection broke his sentence. She started to tremble in her weeping, even though her red bangs covered her bursting emotion; Len knew she was crying.

"Just please stop it," she angled her head to meet his own golden eyes. Tears filled her vision once again, "I know you hate seeing me cry because you said my tears are being wasted by nothing but you're wrong about that Len, so wrong. You mean absolutely everything to me and I cry only because of you, I stay up all night thinking what would become of our happy ending but all of those thoughts always get crumpled away when I know that I'm just the second woman."

"No you're not. I don't even love Akiko."

"I know that you don't but fate won't even let us be together that's why all I will ever be to you is just the woman involved in this affair. I understand that you want to be us to still be together but we can't keep hiding forever, Len."

"Who said we'll have to hide forever? Situations won't always be like this, they'll understand" he tried to persuade with every convincing word he had but it had brought no effect.

"What if they don't? I'm letting you go because I love you and I don't want to be a burden, please just compromise with me."

He shut his eyes tight hoping he'll be able to calm himself with easy breathing, but the dominating rage inside him was overpowering his other emotions, he tightened his clenched fist.

"How do you expect me to compromise with you if you're going to leave me?! Do you think I would just let you walk out of that gate and never see you again? I'm not the Len you knew before, I was a jerk but now I actually care and I give a damn if you would just walk away from me because you're giving up! You shouldn't give up! You said you would be strong for me but what's the use of those words if you're letting your conscience drown you in regret? You can't do this Kahoko! You simply can't!"

She never anticipated that. No, not at all. It was like a bomb that had hit her for his words to burn her more into choosing what was supposed to be done and with what had to be done, it was two different things. He'd always seemed to leave her trying to be strong while breaking inside and Len had wished every time it had happened that she knew he saw her break on the inside while she forced a smile on the outside. He wished she'd known that, however cooperating with her to just figure that out would be nothing but useless and futile.

Fidelity. Is that what he lacked? Was it entrusting his faith to her and to their relationship? Truly, he didn't know.

"I can do whatever I want to make me happy again," she spoke with raw emotion flawed through her words, dead eyes returned his gaze at her

"Will _this_ make you happy?" another answer to that is what he feared.

Only one word can turn his world upside down. "Yes"

That's what he needed to be sure, and by being sure it hurts more than ever. She didn't need to elaborate much further, she walked passed him and became unknown to his presence as if he was just the wind that splashed through her face. She was leaving everything, she wouldn't be able to get it back once she walked away but it was after all the _only _solution to their problem so taking the chance was what she only had to do. A hurting voice sounded through her ears that made her stop her fleets.

"If you leave, I _will _marry her," he threatened but made no effort on facing her.

A painful smile formed on her face, while she began to move her feet again slowly creeping her way to the gate, "then I give you my congratulations."

Nothing more had to be said. That was the only answer he had to hear from her. Once he turned his body around, she was gone; gone from his life and gone forever. He's too weak to even bring her back. For a moment, Len honestly considered tormenting himself by continuing down that path but he knew he was only going to go around in a circle that led back to that same thing. He hadn't reacted because he didn't know why and he couldn't react to her leaving until he knew why. It was impossible for him to react to her leaving without her reason because it was easier to be angry at her reason instead of her leaving. He resented the time limit he'd had. He resented the fact that he'd made his promises because he could see the logic in them and not because he wanted too. He resented the fact that he was so comfortable with her curled in his arms and he could see the sunlight creeping through a crack in the curtains.

He resented the fact that he was going to leave before she awoke just so he could avoid looking into her disappointed eyes.

Reality is what makes it hard for Len to face life every single day. _"I can do whatever I want to make me happy again," _Len thought as they hit him like a blow to the stomach that he felt in the heart. He willed himself to stay standing; he fully wanted to erase every word she said before she left, he wanted to tell her she had no idea what she was talking about and he wanted to pretend that everything she was saying wasn't true.

But he couldn't. Because she was walking away from him even though they hadn't shared anything more than steamy, passion filled nights where conversations on existed in his dreams. If this was it, he wasn't going to cry over losing her. He'll just let his expressionless spirit hold him on until the wedding was over.

Kahoko knew that she would never be Len's in any sense and he would never be hers.

Fate wouldn't allow them to be together.

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REVIEWS AND CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISMS HELP ^^

THANKS ONCE AGAIN.


	12. Chapter 11

**Finally, I've updated! Wahha! Our sports fest was a killer and I totally didn't have enough time to update! I'm glad we won the Volleyball match against the sophomores! Wohoo! The best! Any, here's the 11th chappie. I want to thank my wonderful beta: Annalisemarie99 again for doing a great job as always! LOVE YOU ALL SO PLEASE...R&R! **

* * *

Deliberating wasn't part of the agenda, but it couldn't be helped.

His denial was like a stroke, paralyzing a target of body defiling every action calling out for what was meant from the start that to a certain degree where he didn't know which body part of his that was numbed away with the pain. But he knows that his heart is a part of those affected.

It's more than just a simple denial. Let's call it defiance.

Tsukimori never really minded it, except that now, he was living with his fiancée and didn't like to be bothered as much. Within hours he's getting married to the woman of, well, certainly not of his dreams, and he had no time to play these kinds of games anymore. He had so many things to take care of and if everything wasn't just perfect, he knew Akiko would get a stroke. She was nothing less than hell for him. He sighed, his head dropped down, knowing deep inside, that no matter how many times he would complain and swear not to do it anymore, he would inevitably be at the same place each time his fiancé would call.

The game was a death match amongst the three of them and it's been going on for months now without any fouls or knockouts. Only fighting it away fairly that's got all sucked up.

For Hino and Tsukimori, neither of them grew tired of this. Each kiss was sacred, special, meaningful, and it allowed them to show their love for one another in a gentle, simple way that made both of their hearts flutter in enchantment. He'd been so stupid.

They both had been; him and Kahoko. Though it was never admitted.

Akiko wasn't that gullible either to not notice both of their gestures. She was smart, perhaps too smart for the both of them.

"Len, finally you're home. Did you see your friends? Did they mention about attending the wedding tonight?"

He shrugs nonchalantly in response.

"Len, answer your mother"

"How…how could've you done this to me?"

His mother laughed off his statement, thinking it regarded to the suits she ordered but briskly he disapproved every single one of them. White wasn't his best choiceanyway. "I asked for your opinion about the tuxedo but you just always walk out on the conversation. Sometimes I wonder what's wrong with you these days—"

"Wonder? You just _wonder_ mother? Don't you even know your own son?" The tone he was setting her off seemed too much for a parent then quieted when the look she sent him told him that she needed to.

"What in the world are you even talking about?" She demanded.

Len frustratingly brushed a hand over his face, trying to restrain all of the heat within wanting his _own_ flesh and blood to know how utterly stupid he was for doing something he never should've. He should take a wild guess now that it might be useless since his mother seemed to be as ignorant as everyone else is, "This! Everything! The wedding, Akiko…it's all a mistake! Have you gone clueless to what I'm going through here? And yet I can see that you're just as blind as them."

"Why are you talking to me like this? You—"

He beat her to it with a sentence, "I did this all because I want to be pleased by you, to recognize that I was doing something worthwhile for once. To make you see that you actually have a son. Do you have any idea what it feels like to do something so stupid just for you to notice?"

"I don't get anything at all. Are you telling me this is a—lie?"

Tsukimori knew more than being a liar, he'd been doing it for months. He could have lied, should have but he didn't, he didn't want to anymore.

"Yes."

"What?" A gasp left her lips.

"I didn't want the wedding ceremony in the first place. I lied to you, to only please you."

Her eyes widened at that, setting a whole new record for it. "But why would you?"

He didn't want to face her, he looked to his side and his bangs covered his eyes. Not trying to deceive himself to what his eyes would reveal, "Because I don't know what else to do. My life is a mess Mother, I don't want to ruin it enough as it is. I…I can't marry Akiko anymore. I know I made you happy for a short time and disappointed you again but," He now faced her as a son, "Do you still accept me for my mistake? Will you still be mad at me for doing a thing only for your sake?"

He silenced her with those words. For a bleak moment in time she had seen gray. It was a disgrace, not to him but to her and she felt guilty to know that it was a sacrifice for a son to do something just for the love of a mother he longed for so long; making her happy mattered to him most. _Her_ Len out of all men, being a martyr; going after something he needed; her. She must have seen it but maybe it flew away quickly thinking it was a mistake, it was selfish for her part to give up her son's life only for her account. But, how could he speak of her implying that she be an idiot to not even know what suits the life of her child. Akiko is a good match for him and no one could agree more to that. She couldn't get the guilt off her heart-she lost her time in the past but maybe not this one.

"But this is what's best!" She hollered a cry, "I'm doing this all for you! You even agreed to Akiko and her family so why—"

"You still should've known better! You're my mother; you should've at least asked if this was what I wanted."

"I didn't need to; it was evident enough that it was."

Len gave her a look, with a tone matching his dreadful eyes. "Did you even think that it would be? It's all a set-up, a play! I don't love Akiko; I don't want to get married. I just want to live a life the way I want to, not how you plan it for me. You left me living my life for the past 17 years, what makes this a difference? Is it because you're finally here to see it?"

She was surprised and didn't know if she had to be mad about it but the way he spoke to her; it was painfully true. "I-I had no idea-"

"It's because you don't know your own son."

Misa Hamai admitted one ugly truth; she wasn't really always there for her son. She knew little of him as he grew and even less now that he's totally detaching himself from her. She regretted her faults and maybe this was a new one too. One more flaw that leads to a border, separating her heart from his when it wasn't done purposely but she made that happen only because she didn't know. All he asked was an hour of her time to make things understand but since her work always kept her busy, she had hardly knew how to or what pleased him anymore. It is a great disappointment for a mother to not truly know her son; something which Len wants to make her see. She left him so many times; he wanted to let her know the pain. A hurt of which a child can completely isolate her mother just like she did a few years ago missing so many occasions that meant something special to Len; simply like his birthday. To their family, it became a failure to actually mingle because each always had no time. Maybe something Misa should've valued even more before her life's commitment to the piano and work.

He wasn't at all in his best moods when his mother came home from tours, she felt a complete stranger to him now. At least their maids knew his favorite meal for breakfast than her, "You were lousy with the job. You rarely called to see if I was even doing fine in Japan. Father would also do the same; even for my birthday all I get stuck with is a birthday cake, presents and empty chairs. I wanted you to be a part of my life but it seemed like you didn't."

"You could've told me."

"_Could have, should have_…the verbs you're using, don't you get it?" He was aggravated for her to improvise, "It means that it was supposed to be done and maybe I say the same words to you now. You should have been a mother than I expected."

A ringing inside her ear. That's what it rather sounded than the clear words she didn't want to digest, to accept. "But why didn't you still tell me that this isn't what you desired? Were you so sure that I'd just not mind you just because this is what I said? I know I've not been good as a mother but I still want what makes you happy the least"

"But you already saw that I wasn't. You could've done something about that by then."

A pregnant pause.

"I wanted to know how to make someone happy…especially for your own mother."

Misa was ashamed. This was supposed to be her job, not her son's.

"I'm sorry." She said in a barely audible voice but her next answer was a sob, a crying plea for him to forgive her. She had been wrong; yes, she can see that now and she needs him to understand, to open up that she can give him what he wants only if he can take the apology with pity.

Len strangled himself to maneuver his head away, not yet giving in until he reconsiders. This is his mother, how can he do this? But _she_made him this way and it was still all _her_fault. Cold as he is, he still cared as a son. "I can't…I still don't know. But stop crying, you don't need to cry to me; I just wanted for you to see what you've done. Do you understand now Mother?"

She nodded meekly, letting her tears run down her face. He still loved her, mainly now that she looked so helpless and remorse. He was mean and ruthless but the love for his mother compared to no one else. He after all did this just to prove things to her. Still, Len didn't want yet to give in so. He walked passed her, nearing towards the door when she suddenly grabbed his arm making him turn to her once more, begging with her eyes "Wait. If you wish to have this all over, I'll have to tell Akiko myself and her family to make you have me again. I'm sorry. Please…you can't walk out on your own mother like this."

"I won't leave you. I only need time by myself; I've made more than one mistake. I've hurt and will hurt more people, I'm confused and need to think. You are still my mother and family always comes first." He forced a small smile at the end of his lips assuring her it'd be okay from now on. He'd make things change for the better of it. That's what he'll do, but first, he had to leave this to his mother to make things right again.

"Alright," she lets him go, "I'll give you time and after this…can we do the things we should have done? I want to fulfill my job well, starting now, as your own mother"

His smile broadened, "We'll do that."

And he left out the door. Wishing luck to Misa Hamai; the great pianist and craved a chance for being a great mother.

_7:45 pm_.

A quarter to eight, she noted again as she looked at her wristwatch and sighed painfully as her chest tightened. This makes her weak, she always was but she had the strength to let him go and all that struggles faded quickly once she had left him there standing dumbfounded. It was stiffly the hardest but it was right. Without her in the way, Len wouldn't have any problems anymore. Not to her or Akiko, he could just live freely from there. Without her. There were things Kahoko didn't understand because they hurt her, stabbed her right in until she didn't need to think it over. Tonight makes for one of them but she values the idea of it no matter how much her soul hates herself for this. If Len still goes after her and trashes out on his own wedding, she will completely now go insane. Slowly, one tear ran through her cheeks making it hard for her to breathe. A gentle winter breeze brushed over her as she sat there, the fragrance of the flowers that surrounded her washing over her as she drew in a shaky breath. She felt so stupid and gullible. He was her first, the first man to make her feel special; to make her feel that finally somebody loved and needed her. It made her ecstatic, sensible enough to feel the same way for him.

She'd been too caught up in the very idea that someone other than the boys she usually hung out with was interested in her, too caught up in blushing and feeling shy whenever he was around her, much too caught up in falling for a guy she thought she knew. Feeling hot tears burn; she fought them and shivered slightly at the breeze, the cold brushing over her bare skin. This wasn't fair, why couldn't something for once in her life be what she thought it was? Why couldn't _he_ have been what she thought he was? It hurt. Knowing that something she had been so sure she knew had turned out to be nothing like what she'd thought. It hurt more than when her parent's marriage had broken up and less than when she'd had to move for the first time and leave everything behind her. Because she'd been so sure that he was what he'd said he was, so sure that he liked her the way she liked him and right now, she hated herself for thinking that, she despised herself for even considering that maybe she meant more to him than every other girl that he'd gone after.

_I saw you smile,_

_Shining perfectly as you looked at me_

_I starred at you and it was there when_

_I knew to myself_

_That I loved you_

The song plays in her mind, a melody her father used to sing when she was still a little girl before he had left them. As a daughter, she was mad but knowing how much pain her mother has put up through than hers, it all ebbed away quickly when she had forgiven him. Now that it was her turn to leave someone, that anger she once built inside was what she guessed Len has towards her, for giving up so suddenly and not waiting like she had promised. And it took years before it her emotions wandered far away; she guessed too that it'll take years or longer before she was forgiven for her mistake. She and her father were exactly alike, they both had hurt the persons they loved. There was pain and came with a comfort not too easy to render.

_Love seems to deceive me,_

_But I was sure that you were the one,_

_Holding my hand til' time passes us_

_I thank my heart for making_

_The right decision for once_

_In my entire lifetime_

"So you're only here. I thought you were at the wedding." A voice came up from behind. Instinctively, Kahoko turned and saw Tsuchiura walking to the bench she was sitting on. The light of the moon complimented his toned skin and the olive-green shirt he wore along with ragged jeans.

"You clearly know that I won't absolutely go there. I'd just meet hell." She said exasperatedly as Tsuchiura vaulted over the back of the bench to settle himself next to her, maneuvering himself into a much more comfortable position.

"You're right. Stupid me." He said guiltily and watched Kahoko show off a smile. He felt proud doing that.

"Why are you here?" She asked him, "Didn't Len invite you too?"

"It would only be a waste of time. There are better things to do than just watching them being idiots." Tsuchiura sounded thoughtful as Kahoko willed herself to stay composed, to not release any curb and wait for the rest of what he had to say. Surprisingly, nothing else came about from his mouth.

"But they're better than that, right?" She whispered and Tsuchiura shrugged it off, not wanting to answer her.

"I broke up with him." She choked her words out; she whispered it, wanting to close her eyes even as she fought to keep them open and trained on him, "I…I don't know how I did it but I just did and I thought it would make me feel better if I just let him go so that way I wouldn't have to worry about anything anymore. I wouldn't be a dilemma to anybody especially to him. However, why am I not ok with it? Why does it hurt so much to let him free? I should be happy, he's going to get married, live his life the way he wants it with Akiko, he'll have what we wants and—"

"Hino," Her eyes narrowed at the patronizing tone in his voice. She _hated_ being patronized. As much as she was already a burden to everyone else, being taunted with authority right now wasn't what she needed or wanted. "Tsukimori knows what he wants and that's you. No one is blind to not see it, you've been on the edge so many times risking the things you care for and I saw the better side of you when it all started with your violin, the concourse. You don't just give up and that's what I always liked about you. This situation will make you even stronger if you both surpass it, you love each other and that's enough to will yourself to keep on going."

"I'm tired. I don't want to fight, I want to live. I want to actually breathe in without these things in my head. I want nothing of him anymore." Her voice sounded small, no louder than a strained whisper, even to herself. She wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed, close her eyes and forget this day, forget this moment.

Forget him.

But that was no longer an option.

Len Tsukimori was a complication, the only one that had breached her defenses.

Len and Kahoko.

Their names had never not been intertwined, a constant unit, an unspeakable bond many did not understand.

He was her protector, her guard; he had seen her at her darkest moments, forcing her to move when she would rather have stood still.

But she broke her only armor she needed to be safe, she had destroyed it on her own and it was hard. Harder than anything else to handle.

Tsuchiura saw how she lowered her head, giving it a different angle to see her face when her hair covered most of it. He loved her; Tsuchiura Ryoutaro loved Kahoko Hino ever since he started playing the piano for her. It changed him, don't ask him when, don't ask him why or how but she changed something in him and while he could say it pissed him off, it didn't. He stirred the pianist in him again and _she_did that, something he thought no one would've but thinking about it, probably he fell in love with her long time ago but he never realized about it; for him, Kahoko had been, always, his best friend, almost her brother…but at some point that changed. If before the dramatic episode he only saw Kahoko whenever she looked at him, after his confession she began to see _a girl_.

It was ironic how he'd been hearing all his life how lucky he was because his best friend was the happiest girl there is in school and the best to others…but still he only realized about it when he thought he had lost her. He'd never seen a girl in Kahoko; of course Ryoutaro knew Kahoko was a girl, but he had never looked past that – she was his best friend, period.

"But you know you can't do that. You need him as much he needs you." She fought tears at his words and nodded, he was right. Of course he was right. That didn't mean that it hurt any less.

_I won't let you go,_

_I promise you love, I'll fight_

_Because you're the one,_

_You changed my life_

It taunted her. It's too much, she should've done that but there weren't any other choices. She'd be doing it anyway for both of their freedom, especially Len's. She couldn't afford to be selfish now, there's still a lot of time to mend. Her heart would only have to catch up on it.

"Just keep on fighting Hino. I'll be here with you, going all the way to catch you incase you fall. I won't leave until I know you're already ok. I promise and that's why you can't let him go, not now" She looked at him, pointing her face to his to gawk at his words. His eyes burned her, they glossed with honesty. It was true; Ryoutaro would do anything for her because he needed to make her smile. Her face had reflected, white and blank, her eyes dark empty pools. With a chill, he remembered the look right after she cried to him at Seiso's rooftop weeks ago. She had been like a doll that would never smile again. So terribly remote it was as if she had already left.

He would wait. But now, she was all it was about. She needs this so he'd give it to her without any questions.

She needed a friend.

Kahoko's eyes were impossibly amber, unblinking and intense, directly staring into his, searching past the shadows, and then there was life in them when she smiled at him. Making him do the same to his relief thinking if she'd laugh at him for it but gladly she didn't.

"Thank you," Kahoko said softly, looking up at him innocently as he looked down at her, "For everything. You're a good person Tsuchiura, I can't see why I didn't choose you instead of him."

She surprised him with that and it was obvious how his eyes widened at her. She smiled at him sweetly and he gulped in deep; she didn't suppress the laugh, "I'm sorry. We won't get to that, it was my mistake."

"N-no, it's fine. You're forgiven."

"Sorry, I thought it was funny." He shrugged and Kahoko smiled up at him, despite her narrowed eyes.

"I guess you need a little humor. Glad to be your victim." He replied and she nodded her head emphatically before turning away as new laughter spurted through. It felt like years to be this happy.

"I mean it Tsuchiura-kun, thank you very much." He knew he'd get that. Only a thank you than those endowing words he always wanted to get from her but maybe she wasn't the one yet. There were still more of them out there; for the meantime Kahoko was all he had so he'd move on one way or another. He'd fill his grace and carry on; he wasn't much of a fighter like Tsukimori. This wasn't even his battle.

It wasn't anything new.

He is and forever will be her best friend till' the end of it.


End file.
